Just an Old Scar
by Tsuzuku
Summary: Kakashi meets Hotaru and she seems to be everything he wants in life, but old scars run deep. Kaka/OC Rated M for possible future language, violence/gore, smut. WIP
1. Introductions

_**Author's Note: This is my attempt at a story with an OC. I hope you guys like it and don't think she becomes too Mary Sue-ish *gasp!* I'll be adding chapters as I go. The rating is for possible future smut, language, gore/violence, etc... but I don't know exactly how it will all play out. =) Please R&R!**_

_**I don't own Naruto or any of the characters (except my OCs).**_

_**Enjoy!**_

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It was an unusually warm spring day and the cherry blossoms lined the small dirt road in the countryside. A girl, about ten years old, was in a field covered in lush grass and wildflowers. Though the scenery was sublime, she was concentrating very hard on her training.

She brought her hands together to form a few signs, then slapped them together and waited. And waited. And…

A gust of wind rustled the grasses and flowers of the field.

"Yeah. Sure! Make fun of me!" She shouted at the breeze, "Stupid wind…" She grumbled.

The girl started walking, giving up hope for the day. She was visibly exhausted and running low on chakra. It was her against the wind.

Wind: 1.

Wandering to the river nearby, she hopped over exposed roots and rocks scattered in the woods that were forming. She loved it out here. She couldn't imagine being anywhere else in her life. She kneeled by the gently flowing river and her reflection greeted her.

Everything about her was ordinary: her small, child's body, her dark chestnut hair, even the freckles scattered across her rounded nose. But there was one thing that set her apart. There was one thing that had the women in the village gasping with delight and the men staring at her in awe – her golden eyes.

They were as bright as the sun and the color reflected that brightness. The girl's father had told her she inherited them from his grandmother, but there were no pictures of these mysterious eyes.

She washed her face quickly and rose to head back home. It had been a long day and she was ready for supper. Halfway down the dirt road, she saw it.

Smoke.

It could've been someone burning brush. It could've been everyone burning in their chimneys together. There were a million different reasons why she shouldn't be concerned.

But at the time, this girl of ten couldn't think of a single one.

Her heart raced with dread and fear as she sprinted to her home village; her home where her mother and father lived, where her aunts and uncles and cousins lived, where her friends lived… where everything was.

As she neared the village, the huge plume of smoke turned into ten plumes of smoked. Then it turned into twenty plumes of smoke. Then thirty. And by the time she reached the gates to her hometown, they were innumerable.

When she reached the first few houses, somehow her legs carried her faster. There were people, bleeding and cut and broken strewn along the road, in lawns, and draped across bushes. Bodies hung by their necks from the large oak trees and children sat bawling beside murdered mothers.

She never once thought that anything had happened to her own parents. Her father was a well trained and experience ninja and her mother could hold her own. As she passed this destruction, her only thought was to flee with her parents from this village. They would hide out until they could figure out what happened and then seek revenge once they had a plan.

Never once did she think…

She flung open the small gate at the entrance of her father's land, not noticing the flames engulfing the top floor. She barged through the already opened front door.

"Mama!" She screamed at the top of her lungs, "Daddy!"

She dashed into the kitchen, coughing on the gathering smoke. Nothing. She went into the eating area. Nothing. When she started out to the sitting area, her bare foot splashed into wetness. She looked down.

Blood.

Hot tears started to form in her yellow eyes as she carefully side stepped puddles of blood into the sitting area. Then she saw them. Her mother lay on the wooden floorboards, giant gashes and wounds littered across her torso and chest, her mouth slightly parted and dripping red. Her father was only a few feet from her, his arm outstretched towards his wife, his head halfway unhinged from his body. His face wasn't visible for all the gore.

…

…

Hotaru sat straight up in her bed, her sleeping clothes and sheets soaked with sweat. She swallowed hard in the darkness, her gold eyes glowing in the moonlight.

...

…...

"Kakai-sensei!" Naruto whined accompanied by his trademark pout, "Where're all the ramen shops? You can't do a mission without having ramen first!"

"Naruto, he's _sempai_ now," Pink hair followed his walking pace, "Kakashi-_sempai_,"

Of course, Naruto ignored this fact. He didn't care. All his brain could think about was ramen; and eating ramen; how hot the ramen would be; would they give extra toppings like Ichiraku did? It was all pretty much a straight line towards '_ramen_' in his head.

Hatake Kakashi brought up the rear of the group as they wandered through the middle of the small town. Naruto was in front, attempting to use his nose as a guide for food, Sakura was in the middle, her arms crossed over her small chest and huffing an exasperated sigh at Naruto's every other sentence. Sai was still back in Konoha, undoubtedly doing something for Danzo, though nothing could be proved as to how sinister it was.

It was an ordinary mission… of course, nothing that needed the expertise of the great Copy-nin and two other strong ninjas together. But, they just followed Tsunade's orders as she handed them out and smiled. You must always remember to smile.

At some point, to which Kakashi was so disinterested that he had already pulled out a book, Naruto located a ramen shop. It was 'sub-par' to his favorite, but he would take whatever he could get as long as it was in the form of noodle submerged in broth. Luckily for Sakura and Kakashi, their lodgings were right around the corner. All they had to do was sneak off while Naruto was busy, get some take-out and head back to the room.

"Kakashi-sempai, when do we get to go home?" Sakura pouted as she stuffed another piece of smoked fish in her mouth, "I'm tired of 'recon'," She air-quoted with her fingers, "There's nothing here."

It was his turn to sigh, "Sakura, if Tsunade says there's been a spy threat in this area and she wants us to check it out, then that's what we'll do. No questions asked," And he finished of the last of the dango.

"Hey! I didn't get my share!" Sakura squealed.

By the time Naruto came back, belly bulging, Sakura had climbed into bed and was half unconscious. Kakashi decided it was time for adults. He loved his team like they were family, but they could start killing valuable brain cells if they were around too long. He peeked out the window of their room. A bar. Perfect. He'd go and have a couple of drinks, stare at some women maybe, and be back before Naruto got his first good snore in.

It was infuriating sometimes how Kakashi could be deathly silent without even meaning to. What took Sakura and Sai years of training, and Naruto a lifetime more-or-less, to accomplish, he had down without a trouble. It was a deadly gift.

Kakashi was out the door and down the street within a minute. He breathed in the scent o f smoke and alcohol as he stepped into the doorway.

It was a typical small town bar. There was music, smokey air, hidden nooks for the creepy, and a bar with stools for the chatty. He slid into an unoccupied nook. In seconds, a scantily clad woman with curves that could kill sauntered up to him, "Hey handsome. What'll it be?"

"Two beers and a shot of whatever you want to bring me," He responded, showing her a trademark eye crease. She winked at him and headed off, hips swaying to the rhythm of the music. He scoped out the bar while he waited. It was pretty dead for a weekend – a tell-tale sign that this town was way too small. There were only a few people sitting on the barstools chatting with the bartender. Among them, a woman sat with a friend, laughing and talking. She was beautiful. Of course, by this time in his life the Copy Nin had learned to appreciate the beauty of women.

He headed over.

"Thanks, I'll just sit over here," He told the waitress when he reached the bar. She handed him his glasses, a sour and jealous look covering her face.

Kakashi made no move to speak to the woman at the bar; he merely intended to get a better look at her. She was of athletic build, dressed in short shorts and a low cut top. She used her body to get what she wanted, that much was obvious. Her lips were full and tinted red, her hair almost as brilliant in the same shade.

"My god! I can't believe you didn't see him!" She exclaimed with delight at her companion, "He was…" She licked her lips as she trailed off, her emerald colored eyes sparkled at her thoughts.

After a moment's hesitation at the dirty images dancing in her head, the woman suddenly turned on her heels and was face to face with Kakashi quicker than he would've liked.

"Hello…" She purred, twirling a fiery lock of hair in one finger.

Her friend pulled her back, "Sorry… she gets…crazy when she's drunk,"

Kakashi was caught totally off guard. This new woman's eyes were the color of the sun. They gleamed back at him, radiating the most penetrating warmth he had ever known. It was like her eyes broke through the darkest of nights. And here they were – staring straight at him. It felt as though they could see _through_ him.

"Um... no, really, it's okay," He quickly regained his composure, but was still staring back at those eyes. He was broken from his spell when she broke eye contact.

"Really, Ai, you should learn to hold your liquor better," She groaned as her friend started to let go of the use of her legs. Ai, as she was called, slowly started to sink to the floor, the mysterious woman still trying to hold on to her.

Kakashi reached out to assist the failing woman, holding Ai up by her underarms.

"Thanks," Gold Eyes breathed. Ai was two inches away from unconscious. "Hey, would you mind bringing her back to our room? We've got a long walk tomorrow and I can't just let her sleep in a bar," She chuckled, somehow her eyes shining even more.

"Of course,"

Kakashi picked up red-haired Ai with all the ease of a giant and walked alongside Gold Eyes until they were only a couple of blocks away from his own lodgings. He followed the woman to room 31 and she pulled out a rusted metal key. The door unlocked with a scrape.

Without waiting, she opened the door and walked in, apparently expecting Kakashi just to come in uninvited.

"Come on," She called from somewhere he couldn't see, "I won't bite, I swear,"

There it was.

Kakashi's smirk was hidden beneath his mask as he entered the shabby motel room. It seemed that Gold Eyes was in the kitchen, getting a glass of water and she turned to Kakashi.

"The couch is fine," She pointed to the worn out furniture a few feet away from him, "That's what she gets for troubling me like this. Well… _both_ of us," She laughed. Her teeth were white and perfect as porcelain and she reached up to brush chestnut hair from her face with a gloved hand.

"What happened there?" Kakashi's head tilted towards the hand.

"What? This?" She looked down at her left hand as if remembering something from long ago, "Oh, it's just an old scar,"

She set her glass down, "Can I get you something? We don't have anything but water, but…" She trailed, the beginnings of another laugh dancing on her lips.

"Water's fine, thank you,"

After Kakashi laid the unconscious Ai on the couch, he went to the kitchen where Gold Eyes was propped against the yellowed refrigerator. She handed him a glass filled with tap water.

"Thanks for your help," She said genuinely.

He smiled in return.

"I haven't introduced myself. I'm K-"

"Hatake Kakashi, the Copy Ninja," She interrupted, a sly smile on her face. At his reaction she followed with, "Oh, it's obvious. You're the only Konoha ninja that wears a mask and covers his left eye with a hitai ate. Don't look so surprised,"

"And you are…?" He questioned, a little relieved at the fact that he _was_ well known. Who knows who this woman was…?

She looked nervously from Kakashi to her friend, "Well, since you're from Konoha, I guess it wouldn't hurt to say. Ai and I are Kusagakure ninja on our way to the Leaf Village. We've come across had times and are looking for help," She dropped her head as if shamed.

Looking down at Gold Eye's right thigh, he saw the hitai ate wrapped around her skin. He didn't notice, he must be getting too old.

"What does the Village in the Grass need from Konoha exactly?"

"I have orders to speak with the Hokage, if you don't mind. Anyone in between here and there is irrelevant," She replied, determination radiating through her strange colored eyes.

He held his hands up in a gesture of retreat, "Okay, okay, I understand. You must know its my duty to keep the Leaf safe as possible,"

"Oh, I know," She smiled.

Gold Eyes walked him back to the door and just before she shut it behind him, Kakashi wheeled around, "What's your name?" He spouted without thinking.

She smiled at him, the warmest smile he had ever seen, "Hotaru," And with that, she closed the old door.

…

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_**So what do you think will happen? Review please! Chapter 2 will be up ASAP ;)**_


	2. Journeys

The next day brought a downpour of cold rain. It was the kind of cold that chilled your bones. Kakashi sat outside on the porch of the motel watching strangers pass by below him. Their mission was done as of the day before and the Leaf nin had gone to bed intending to depart in the wee hours of the morning. But the "wee hour" had come and gone. It was just too unpleasant to leave with this monsoon coming down.

Kakashi looked back inside at a drooling blonde haired kid curled up in a blanket on the floor. Sakura had gone to get breakfast for everyone, but had yet to return after nearly twenty minutes. If she wasn't back within another ten, the jounin decided, he would have to go looking for her. And he hated the rain.

As he silently willed her back to the motel, the door clicked open and, miraculously, there she was. He whispered a 'thank god' and returned to the warmth inside.

Just then dark hair came through the doorway followed by red.

It was the girls from the night before. What were their names again?

"Kakashi-sempai? This is…" Sakura started but was cut off.

"Ai and Hotaru, am I correct?" He finished for her with a smile.

Sakura paid him no mind, though, and instead gave the blonde a little kick, "Naruto! Wake up!" Her eyes grew white with frustration, "Don't you do _anything_ useful?"

He mumbled in his sleep, "Hmm… Sakura-chan… a little to the left,"

Now it was a hard kick.

Naruto popped up instantly with an "OUCH!" and the young woman stalked away feeling satisfied.

Hotaru let out a slight chuckle, "Ai, he reminds me of you, am I right?"

The redhead just scowled.

"Sorry to impose," Hotaru announced to the room, but her eyes focused on Kakashi, "We met Sakura in the market and recommended some _good_ food. Those guys can be sticklers when it comes to quality,"

The women pulled out breakfast and laid everything out on the table in an organized manner as everyone came to sit down. Breakfast was relatively quiet except for the scraping of chopsticks and clinking of bowls. At the end, everyone let out a satisfied sigh.

Hotaru looked up, "So when are you leaving? We were planning on heading out, but this rain is less than desirable,"

"Hmm…" Kakashi responded.

"Same here!" Blonde locks went flying as Naruto scooted closer to Ai, "We're gonna go tomorrow I guess. Wanna join us?" He asked eagerly, hypnotized by red hair and generous breasts.

Ai burst into laughter, "Gee, I don't know…" She teased, "What do you think Hotaru?"

"Well," Gold eyes flicked back to Kakashi, causing him to get lost in the shimmer, "Since you're more than likely the team leader, it's up to you. I mean," She let a sheepish smile slid out, "We _are_ going to the same place,"

Kakashi just stared at her. Was she doing something to him? He'd never felt his heart flutter the way it was now just by looking at a woman. He only nodded his head in agreement, but it was lost by Sakura's squeal of delight, "Thank goodness! I'm _so_ tired of being the only girl around here,"

The rest of the afternoon and part of the evening was spent playing Go, exchanging stories and the girls teaching Sakura traditional dances.

"No, no, I swear I could _not_ make this up!" Ai insisted as she lounged in the floor, back against the couch, "This guy goes to attack me and all I can see is this giant booger hanging out of his nose!"

Everyone was laughing and drinking. They carried on like they were all good friends from the same village.

"Okay, I can top that," Hotaru started, "This woman cuts me off as I'm walking to Suma, right? She tries to rob me, fails miserably, and as she goes to punch me…" She paused. Everyone stared at her intently, "Her right breast pops out. No kidding!"

More laughing. More drinking.

By the time night fell, Hotaru and Ai had decided it was best to get back.

"We've been here all day, we should really get back and prepare to leave tomorrow," Ai chirped as she swayed on her feet.

Hotaru steadied her, "Yeah, she's a total lightweight, we don't want her falling over on the road tomorrow," She laughed.

"Maybe we'll see you tomorrow then?" Naruto piped in, hopeful.

They decided they would leave it to chance and with a few farewells, the girls had exited the motel and were making their way down the stone street to their own shabby motel. Kakashi made like he was going out to "get fresh air" and watched as the girls walked on. They were both truly beautiful and, he bet with himself, deadly dangerous. But they seemed nice enough. And he couldn't help but feel intrigued by Hotaru. There was just something about her…

…..

….

"There's a tea house, guys. Let's stop there," Sakura pointed to a small wood and straw building in the distance. A thin string of smoke escaped from the chimney.

"Sounds good. Let's go," Kakashi lead the group and in minutes they were walking in the entranceway of the tea house.

A hunched old lady came smiling up to them as they took a seat at a scratched wooden table.

Dango and peach tea for Sakura.

Soba noodles and green tea for Naruto.

Onigiri and hot mint tea for Kakashi.

The wrinkled woman shuffled away, the orders stuffed into her brain. The tea house was quaint and, actually, quite lovely. It was tucked away into the edge of thick woods and a creek brushed water over smooth rocks inn the back. Sunlight peeked through the trees and spilled into Kakashi and his team.

"You're ridiculous!" Laughter could be heard approaching from the dirt road. Soon, the two women from the village entered.

They stopped in the doorway, a lingering smile draped on Hotaru's face and smug one on Ai's.

"Well, well, well… Hotaru, I think we've got stalkers," Ai joked as she took a seat at a table.

"_You_ followed _us_," Sakura pouted, clearly upset at the fact that the groups hadn't rejoined that morning.

"Oh, come now, Sakura," Hotaru piped up, "We've both been busy. Besides, we've met up now, haven't we?" She glanced at Kakashi and upon noticing him staring right back, quickly averted her eyes.

Was that a blush?

Lunch was uneventful. The five of them chatted as they ate. Afterwards, they each paid their bill and headed out.

Before the sun set for the night, the front gates of Konoha were visible to the group. It was difficult for Hotaru to see, but at first glance it looked as powerful as it was. A mile high wall separated the cozy village from the threats of the outside world. She couldn't believe she was actually walking towards it.

As the enormous doors opened to greet them, two ninjas sat at a nearby spot waiting to check them in.

"Oh, hey Kakashi, it's just you guys," One of them with a bandage over the bridge of his nose called out.

"Who's that?" The other with a senbon hanging loosely from his mouth purred at Hotaru and her friend.

Hotaru stepped forward, "I'm Hotaru and this is Ai. We're here on orders to meet with the Hokage on business I cannot discuss,"

"Right, right," The first guy yawned, "Sign these, date, initial, etcetera etcetera and you're good to go,"

The senbon guy sat straight up, "You guys have anywhere to stay? I'd hate to see you stuck on the street. If you want I've got-"

"We've made arrangements, thank you," Ai cut him off.

Disappointment washed over his face and he slunked back into his seat, "Right…"

With a quiet giggle, the women turned back to the opening of the village. Hotaru couldn't believe she'd made it. The village was exposed for her now.

They were finally in the Leaf Village.

…

…

…

_**Note: I know things are getting off to a slow start, but there needs to be a little building. =) Next chapter up soon! Please R&R!**_


	3. Arrivals

Cold darkness was creeping in on them as Hotaru and her companion crept down the main road of Konoha. Streets lights were coming on and doors to shops were starting to slam shut in anticipation of exhausted owners calling it a day. Children were called home by agitated mothers. Small packs of dogs ran with them.

The truth was, the women had no plan for where they would be lodging for the night, contrary to what had been said to the guy with the dangling senbon. They just continued walking. Hotaru couldn't help but feel a feeling of welcomeness and warmth rush over her, though she had yet to talk to anyone else in the village. Everyone seemed like a giant family. It was foreign to her.

Suddenly reality rushed back to her and she stopped in her tracks.

"So where are you guys staying?" A feminine voice behind her chirped.

Chestnut hair and glittering gold eyes turned to face pink locks and green, "Well…" Hotaru looked to her friend with uncertainty, "I don't really know, actually,"

"Well," Sakura started, "I still live with my parents so _that's_ out. And I wouldn't recommend anyone… and I mean _anyone_ stay with Naruto. What a pig sty…" Naruto grumbled at this, "Soo…" She trailed off, rocking back and forth on her feet and clasping her hands behind her back innocently. She glanced at her old sensei.

He wasn't stupid. Or slow.

"No, no, no," Hotaru shook her head furiously, "We couldn't be such a bother. I mean, really, we all don't know each other. We'll just rent a room somewhere and that'll be that,"

Kakashi just stood with his hands in his pockets, "Well, as you can see, everything's starting to close up now. It would be difficult to find something so late,"

"Yeah, and Kakai-sensei has a pretty big apartment," Naruto decided to share with a smile.

"You both can stay for the night and go see Tsunade-sama in the morning," The jounin finished.

Hotaru released an uncomfortable sigh and looked to Ai for an answer. Thankfully, you could count on the redhead to be the most outspoken, and possibly rude, of the two, "If you insist. Thank you very much," She grinned at Kakashi, "Where to?"

And they headed off.

…

…...

_Naruto was right_, Hotaru thought to herself as they came to a nicely furnished hallway of a complex and Kakashi unlocked a door, revealing a large space inside. The walls were mixtures of stone and wood, with tile, wood and carpeted floors. The ceilings seemed to rise to the heavens, skylights topping them off at their peaks. The kitchen was large with marble countertops and sleek appliances.

"Holy… shit…: Hotaru mumbled, forgetting manners for a moment, "This is…"

"Not my idea," He finished for her, "I couldn't care less what it looks like. Wasn't really my choice,"

Her jaw dropped. How could someone live in a place like this and not give a damn about whether it was nice or not?

A clear thump of fabric hitting wood sounded from nearby. Ai had dropped her pack down onto the floor and was walking in circles taking in the environment.

"Well," Kakashi sounded after a long silence, "Make yourselves at home. There are two bedrooms for you both and I'll take the couch tonight," He concluded with a smile and a signature eye crease. Then they all parted ways.

…

…

It was decided that Hotaru and Ai would go to see about a meeting with the Hokage in the morning and until then would just stay at Kakashi's. Ai, being the night owl and party lover, decided she would meet back up with Sakura and Naruto and some of their friends for a night out. Hotaru, on the other hand, was exhausted from the trip and, admittedly, taking care of a drunk Ai nearly every night since they left. She vowed she wouldn't play babysitter again tonight and would stay in to catch up on sleep.

Neither had seen Kakashi since they had arrived at his home almost two hours ago, but they didn't go looking for him. There wasn't a need to bother their generous host. They had pestered him enough already.

After Ai left for the night, Hotaru spent her free time roaming the large apartment. She had taken the master bedroom and her only belongings were snug in her pack next to the bed. She spent only a few minutes exploring the bedroom, then the bathroom, then the living room until she came to a beautiful glass door. The designs etched in the glass were abstract but no less beautiful than a grand church filled with stained glass windows. Of course, curiosity got the best of her and her hand twisted the brass knob to open to a porch overlooking a back road of Konoha.

She was a good three stories above the street and, since it was so late, there was nobody wandering around outside. Hotaru cold smell the river nearby and relished in the sight of the groups of fireflies in the grass below. Konoha really was a beautiful place, but it brought anxiety for her too.

She leaned forward on the railing and dipped her head into her hands as she blew out a sigh. She shouldn't be here and she knew it, but it couldn't be helped. Hotaru stood there, her head draped over her arms until she heard "Yo," From her right side.

She jerked up like someone had just hit her. The masked ninja sat on the wooden rail, leaned against the side of the apartment, reading an orange book. _Icha Icha…_

"What the hell…" Hotaru grabbed the place where her heart was, "Are you trying to scare me to…" She focused more on the cover of the book, "Are you sitting on the rails of your three story high porch reading… a dirty book…?"

He smiled, "Yes. Yes I am. Care to join me?"

Hotaru eyed the railing near his feet. What a crazy guy. What a… strange guy.

"Uh… well…" But her answer was in her actions. She went to the railing she had just eyed earlier and, placing her hands behind her for support, lifted herself onto it.

"This is a nice place you've got here," She said looking around, "And I want to thank you again for letting us stay the night,"

Kakashi waved his hands in dismissal.

Soon, conversation started. It flowed naturally without either of them trying. They talked about old schools and training to parents and family.

"I don't really have family, either. Well, except for Ai. She's like a sister to me," Hotaru rolled her eyes, "A _baby_ sister, but still… a sister,"

An hour later….

"They want me to continue my lineage," He sighed, "That's just not my forte – the family thing,"

Two hours later…

"So this guy comes up and tells me he'll give me a hundred. I'm looking at him, really confused, so he says he'll do two hundred… He thought I was a freaking prostitute!" She clutched her stomach in laughter as Kakashi did the same.

They lost track of time as they continued to chat. Somehow they grew more comfortable with each other after every sentence. It was like they had known each other for a long time, but had simply lost touch.

A clock chimed three in the distance, "Oh my god, look at the time," Hotaru jumped up from her seat, "I should really get to bed. I'm sorry…"

They retreated inside and, after goodnights, she crept to the bedroom, changed and crawled into bed. As she laid her head on the pillow, she felt a curious warmth as she breathed in. It was a sweet, musky smell and she buried her face further into the pillow. The smell was all around her – in the pillow, the sheets, and the blanket. She breathed even deeper.

And then her heart dropped. The warmth turned to a knotted guilt in her stomach. She was breathing _his_ scent. It was him on the pillows; him on the sheets; him on the blanket. What was she doing? She shouldn't even think anything about this guy. She was here for business and that was it. She just had to get it done and go home. Period.

Hotaru punched the pillow a few times, then rolled onto her back. She tried to convince herself it was because it was more comfortable, but she really just needed to keep her face away from that pillow. She laid there, gold eyes glowing in the darkness, willing sleep to claim her.

And it did.

…

…

She turned to vomit in the bushes. She couldn't believe her eyes. She wanted to rip them out for deceiving her like this.

She stumbled her way back through the house and down the front steps. Everything was blurry before her. Her throat and nostrils burned now. The heavy scent of smoke clogged her lungs. The flames from house fires made the entire village feel like an oven.

Then loud steps neared. The girl tried to hide behind some bushes, but she couldn't see and couldn't breathe… she didn't make it before a large hand grabbed her hair and pulled her to her feet before him.

Fear should've taken hold of her, but the shock of seeing her parents weighed her heart down and blocked out anything else. The hand wheeled her around to meet her face to face.

She blinked many times to clear her vision and what she saw would haunt her dreams for years to come. He was a tall, burly man with a few missing teeth on the sides and a missing right eye. The socket had been filled with a crude metal ball that wiggled when his vision shifted. Nasty scars streaked down the right side of his face and continued down his thick set neck.

"Well, well…" He snarled, his breath causing her to choke, "What a cute little girlie we've found, mates," A thick red tongue licked dry, dirty lips.

There were three or four men behind him, the girl couldn't make out. They weren't nearly as large as this one, but they all stunk as well. They chuckled devilishly at his "wit".

The hideous one-eyed man lifted her off the ground by her hair and she winced at the pain, fresh tears springing from her eyes. A dirt and blood smudged finger stroked along her bottom lip with a lover's touch, "I think she's got a bit of fun in her…"

…

…

A blood curdling scream filled Hotaru's ears and she sat up in bed and her first instinct was that something had happened to Ai.

But she found her own mouth gaping.

Giant arms were wrapped around her torso, trying to still her and she fought them. It was the one-eyed man and she knew it. She had to get away. She had to escape.

"Get off!" She screamed, filling the blank space with echoes of her fear, "Let me go! Let me go! Let me go!" She pleaded and wailed until she couldn't struggle anymore. Her screams turned to sobs as she slunked over.

The arms loosened their hold as she leaned over to lie on the covers, her face buried in the fabric hiding her tears.

"Its okay," A masculine voice reassured her, "You're safe here," A hand stroked her arm.

Something in the voice calmed her and she turned her face to see Kakashi sitting on the edge of the bed.

"You started screaming out of nowhere," He looked at her with genuine concern, "Are you okay?"

Hotaru sat up, embarrassed at herself for acting out her nightmare at a stranger's house, "I'm… I'm okay… thank you," She shuffled back to lay against the pillows, briefly swiping under her eyes for tears, "Sorry… for that," She apologized sheepishly.

He gave her a smile. There was something in his smile that calmed her. She thought this was a funny idea considering she had never seen his face. How ridiculous.

He bade her goodnight again, after checking on her one more time, and stood up to leave her alone. But before she knew what she was doing, her hand had jumped out of its own accord and grabbed his.

"Wait. Would you… stay?" She pleaded with eyes as bright as a full moon, "Just for a little while?"

Kakashi stood for a moment, staring at her and she thought he would brush her off. Then, to her surprise and unintended joy, he walked to the opposite side of the bed, turned the light off and laid down.

…

…

…

_**Note: I've really got some good ideas for this story. =) Please R&R I love to have some feedback!**_


	4. Tensions

The first thing Hotaru felt when she regained consciousness was the softness of the mattress under her and the blankets above her. The second thing was when she cracked open one eye and bright morning sun beamed in. She waited a second to open both eyes and peer around the room. It took a moment for the events of late last night to sink in.

Kakashi.

Her screaming.

Him in the bed.

With her.

She sat straight up and looked beside her. No… he wasn't there, but she could hear movement in the kitchen. The more she thought about what had happened, the more she can to realize that they hadn't done anything… inappropriate. She was shaken by a nightmare and he had stayed to comfort her. That was all.

But it made her angry at herself. She should never have let that happen. She was here for a mission - a very important mission - and she couldn't risk it all because of a stupid bad dream.

She could hear the clinking of glass and smell bread warming as she slipped out of bed and padded to the bathroom. Hotaru furiously raked through her hair with her fingers as she peered into the mirror. Today she would talk to the Hokage, finish her mission and leave – as quickly as possible. She and Ai shouldn't be here longer than absolutely necessary.

Hotaru gathered her long hair to one side and, twisting it into a braid, tied the end off with a band she had on her wrist. She decided she would eat a quick breakfast and then she had to leave. She had to get away from Kakashi as fast as possible. There was no need to get comfortable… it never worked out for her.

When she opened the door, the assorted fragrances hit her at once. There was bread, tea, eggs, and fruit all lined out on the table. Her heart sank at his kindness.

"Oh, good morning," He looked up from pouring a cup of tea, "I was just about to get you. I figured you had a… a rough night to say the least, so I made breakfast,"

She went to her place at the table with gritted teeth.

_Don't get comfortable,_ she reminded herself as she started to silently eat.

Kakashi followed her lead, starting with tea and eggs then working his way to the cut fruit.

"About last night…" Hotaru started, not sure what to say. _'I'm crazy.' 'I had a shitty childhood.' 'I have the same nightmare at least four nights a week, no biggie.'_

"Don't apologize," He smiled.

And it melted her damn heart.

When the food was almost completely gone, she leaned forward to rest her forehead on her hand. Her head felt like it was about to explode.

"Are you okay?"

"Uh… yeah, I just…" She sighed, "I have a headache is all,"

But as soon as she finished her sentence, her skin prickled and her stomach felt like it was hovering in mid air. Kakashi had leaned towards her and his hands were on either side of her neck, gently pulling apart her braided hair.

"I think this is done too tight," He spoke softly, his face only a foot away from her's. He started at the bottom, slowly pulling the band off of the end. Their eyes were locked on each other's, Hotaru's eyebrows pulled slightly together in a worried manner. She could feel the tension; she could feel what he felt. She was just scared of what was happening.

His fingers worked themselves into the pleat and started stroking downwards to piece it apart. They didn't say a word to one another; they just kept their eyes locked on each other. Hotaru swallowed hard and, without realizing it, her pink lips had parted slightly in anticipation.

Kakashi leaned towards her, tilting his head just barely. He was going to kiss her and god help it if she didn't want him to, too. She wanted him to touch her like she had never wanted anything before and the only thing in the world was him.

His masked face was only a few inches from her lips now. Her breathing was picking up.

Then the door flew open and the chatter of a group of people broke the still air. Just like that his hands were gone and he was sitting back in his seat.

But they were still staring at each other.

And Hotaru's lips were still parted.

"Kakai-sensei," Naruto bounced into the kitchen and grabbed a piece of toast off of the table, "Did you know Ai is our age?" He motioned around the room to himself, Sakura, a girl with a blonde ponytail, and a boy with a dark bowl cut.

Ai slid into the seat beside her, "Did you guys have fun?" She smirked.

Hotaru rolled her eyes and rose from her place, taking her dirty dishes with her, "I slept, Ai. That's all. What did _you_ do?" She deposited the dishes in the sink.

"We went out to a couple fun places. I crashed at Ino's house with Sakura," She smiled at Sakura and the other girl standing in the entranceway.

"Well, Ai, that's sounds great and all, but we really need to get going so we can get this done," Ai nodded her head in understanding.

Hotaru turned to Kakashi, any traces of whatever they had shared were gone, "Thank you kindly for your hospitality. We really appreciate it,"

Within half an hour, the dishes had been cleaned up and Hotaru and her companion were off to the Hokage's mansion, Naruto as their guide.

The three of them chatted about the party the group had gone to the night before and how Ai was great fun. It made Hotaru feel better knowing Ai had been able to be normal, even if only for a night. She deserved that much.

Before long, they were at their destination and Naruto bid them a sad goodbye.

"Sucks that you guys don't live around here," He pouted, "If you come back by, look me up,"

The women nodded then entered the building. The Hokage's mansion was much like Hotaru expected it to be – it was clean, orderly, and very large. People were bustling in and out carrying papers, weapons, or even people.

They asked about the Hokage's office and followed the direction indicated to them. After climbing four flights of stairs, they encountered a large set of wooden doors. It had to be her office. But a dark haired lady was sitting at a desk nearby, "Can I do something for you, ladies?" She beckoned.

"Actually, yes," Hotaru spoke up, "We're from Kusagakure. We're here on orders to speak with the Hokage of Konoha,"

"Mmm…" She looked down at a clipboard, "She had an emergency and left to take care of it. Would it be possible to check back tomorrow?"

Hotaru crinkled her face in disappointment, "Well, we're actually pressed for time,"

"And broke," Ai threw in.

"Um…" The lady started again, apparently mulling over options in her head, "Kakashi! Come here!"

Hotaru swiveled around to see a gray haired jounin strolling casually up the stairs, orange book in hand. _This can't be real…_

The black haired lady spoke again, "Kakashi, can you take care of these ladies for the night? They're here for Tsunade-sama, but she's out today," She threw in a puppy-dog look and started to walk away, but not before she turned to Hotaru and said, "Oh, I'm Shizune by the way. When you come back tomorrow ask for me. So sorry for troubling you, but I'm sure Kakashi will be a good host," And she disappeared.

"I'm sure he will...," Hotaru turned to Kakashi, bottom jaw jutting out in frustration, "Are you following me?" She blurted when it was just the three of them.

He looked hurt by the statement, "Actually, I work around here so…" He shrugged and headed back downstairs. Pausing he asked, "Are you both coming or not? I can't just leave foreign ninjas alone in the village," Then continued his stroll downward.

Ai rolled her eyes and followed.

Actually, they followed behind him in silence for quiet awhile. At one point, they argued back and forth about whether he had actually forgotten them or not. Hotaru insisted he had. Ai was adamant that he was just messing with them. Then salvation came.

Sakura and her friend Ino waved in the distance. Ai waved back, a giant grin spread across her face. Hotaru sent a silent thank you to the heavens. But Kakashi spun on his heels to face Ai and Hotaru.

"One of you needs to stay with me," He looked straight to gold eyes, "I need collateral in case one of you gets into trouble,"

"Not it!" Ai shouted as she ran to pink and blonde haired kunoichi.

Hotaru bit the inside of her cheek, "Is there actually a point to this?" She questioned a little annoyed. She couldn't decide if it was the fact that she was attracted to him or the fact that he had ignored her for the good part of an hour. Which did she want?

"I'll give you a proper tour if you'd like," Kakashi spoke, ignoring her question. As he started walking again, book retired to his pant's pocket, she trotted up alongside him. The sun was high in the sky now and cast shadows from his hair to his face and neck. She wondered to herself what he was hiding under that mask. How many people knew?

Kakashi took her to the main square, then around some of the shops, but the tour ended at a wooded area beside the river. Not many people were near this place. In fact, it was well hidden from traffic of any kind. The way the light shone on the swiftly moving water hypnotized Hotaru as she stood, gazing at the stream. She absent mindedly thought of how rocks are changed by the perseverance of water… and how water could never wash her past away.

Gold eyes shifted to Kakashi. He seemed just as taken as she was by the current. At the sight of her movement, he looked over, "Beautiful, isn't it?" He didn't wait for an answer, "It's the best spot in the village to get away,"

Under a trance of sunlight, Hotaru started to inch towards the edge. It _was_ beautiful. She always loved and respected how villages built their lives around the water instead of destroying it.

"Hey Kakashi!" A little boy shouted a couple of feet behind the pair. Hotaru nearly jumped out of her skin and toppled… right over the edge of the bank. She hit cool water instantly and just as she was swimming upward to the surface light, a burst of bubbles exploded nearby. As she surfaced for air, Kakashi's masked face was before her's, "I don't need saving _thanks_," She ground out, "I _am_ a ninja, too, you know. I just…" She spat out river water as she grabbed onto the bank to pull herself out, "Don't expect random loud kids to scream behind me," She glared at the kid.

Hotaru vaguely imagined herself a wet cat, irritable and drooping, as she flopped down on the grass. Kakashi quickly followed suite. He didn't say a word; he just stared out at the river water again.

Then they both started laughing in unison. The boy darted off, apparently scared of wet cats that started laughing hysterically for no reason. And they continued to laugh, laying back on the grass, soaking wet.

"That was ridiculous!" She panted.

"I can't believe you just fell in like that. It was slow motion the whole way down," Kakashi added. He turned his head to face her, "I think we need some dry clothes,"

"Agreed," Hotaru nodded.

Kakashi stood and offered his hand to Hotaru's gloved one then they set off. Luckily, his apartment was only a couple of blocks from the river site so they were spared a slew of strange looks as they continued chuckling the whole way back.

Kakashi unlocked his door as Hotaru wrapped her arms around her wet body. She wasn't expecting to stay gone for too long so she hadn't prepared many changes of clothes. She figured this would fall under 'emergency' apparel.

They stepped into his apartment and the door clicked shut, "Do you have anything to change into?"

She nodded as she made her way to the bedroom. To her surprise he followed her. He didn't just follow her in the direction of the bedroom, he followed her all the way into the room and to the same side. Her heart quickened a bit at the excitement of it all, "What… what are you doing?" She breathed, his body only a couple of feet from her, closing her into a corner of the room.

Although he wore a mask, his smirk was obvious, "Well…" He drawled, "I… I…" Kakashi looked deep into her eyes, "Live here. And my clothes are here… in my bedroom…" He finished, his voice as velvety and sultry as if he were making pillow talk.

She scoffed at him and went to push herself through the other side of him, but he stopped her. His hands were holding her arms to her sides and his muscular body blocked her path, "Why? Is there something you want?" He purred.

She just swallowed hard and looked at him, desperately trying to resist what she was feeling. But it wasn't working, he could see it in her eyes.

Without warning, he bent down and kissed her through his mask. It wasn't at all unpleasant like she thought it might be. The smoothness of the mask felt warm against her mouth. She could feel his hot breath against her tongue and his lips took her bottom one and sucked gently.

He released her arms to grab hold of her hips and pressed her against the wall, never taking his mouth off of her's. She knew she shouldn't be allowing this, but at the moment she was so caught up in him – his touch, his breath, his skin, his scent – that she couldn't think straight.

But he asked her, "Is this what you want?"

She paused.


	5. Sins

_Without warning, he bent down and kissed her through his mask. It wasn't at all unpleasant like she thought it might be. The smoothness of the mask felt warm against her mouth. She could feel his hot breath against her tongue and his lips took her bottom one and sucked gently._

_He released her arms to grab hold of her hips and pressed her against the wall, never taking his mouth off of her's. She knew she shouldn't be allowing this, but at the moment she was so caught up in him – his touch, his breath, his skin, his scent – that she couldn't think straight._

_But he asked her, "Is this what you want?"_

_She paused._

…

…

Her throat was dry as a bone.

But other parts of her were very… very wet.

Hotaru's brain and desire waged war against each other in her head. She shouldn't do this. She shouldn't _want_ to do this.

As she looked up at him, all she could feel was want and need. His body heat pressed her against the wall, his hands still poised on each hip bone. He waited for an answer. Of course, she naturally assumed it was a rhetorical question. Who would actually ask permission at a time like that? But as he waited, staring into her golden orbs, she realized that he actually cared.

He was actually asking for her permission.

The sentiment brought tears to her eyes. It reminded her of a time she'd tried to forget, long ago, of a man and his forcefulness. It reminded her of her struggle to survive. And here was a man who was powerful and strong enough to take it.

But he waited.

Hotaru leaned into him, pressing her body against his, and kissed his masked face again. She brought her hands behind his head, feeling the softness of his mask and hitai ate. Her fingers ran through his silver hair. Kakashi's hands moved from her hips to cradle her lower back.

His covered mouth moved hungrily to her neck and he hoisted her up against the wall, her legs no longer grounded on the floor but wrapped around his waist. She could feel his erection pressing into her.

Hot.

Hard.

She leaned her head back, urging him to explore her neck and breast. He took the hint and moved. Before she could catch a breath, his face was buried between her neck and collarbone, nipping and kissing as he moved. Lower. Lower.

BAM! BAM! BAM!

Pounding on the door.

"Son of a bitch…" Kakashi grumbled to himself, obviously agitated at the constant interruptions they received recently. He lowered Hotaru to stand on the floor again and sighed, "Sorry… one second,"

When he had left the bedroom, she was suddenly aware of her surroundings. Sunlight poured in the large window, a few tree branches and leaves were visible window. The room smelled like dirt and sweat and clean laundry mixed into one. His room was tidy. The bed was made. She hadn't noticed anything before now and that was what scared her – she wasn't paying attention anymore. She was in a foreign village, in the middle of a job, and here she was getting hot and heavy with Kakashi - the famous fucking Copy Ninja.

What the hell was she thinking?

Murmurs could be heard in the other room, muffled by the walls and the hum of the air conditioning.

"We're going out for dinner, Kakai-sensei,"

"Yeah, we came by for Hotaru," Sakura's voice broke through the hyperness of Naruto's, "Well... and you… if you want," She added. Hotaru could hear her voice back track.

A faint smile drug across her lips. They had accepted her, though they had no idea who she was. They had welcomed her and invited her, though she was still a stranger.

These Leaf ninja were nuts.

"Want to go to dinner?" Kakashi leaned against the doorway, smiling at her.

"Are you asking me out?" She retorted.

"Hmm... is that a yes?"

She couldn't help but chuckle at his boldness. He seemed airy and like an avid daydreamer, but he definitely would speak his mind, "Of course it is. Just let me change my clothes. They're still wet, you know,"

He shut the door to let her change and the commotion started back up in the living room. Actually, once she thought about it, it probably had never stopped. Her brain seemed to short wire when Kakashi was around. Rummaging through her bag, Hotaru found her nicest outfit, though still a ninja uniform, and changed. She draped her wet clothes over the shower, pulled her fingers through her damp hair and headed for the door.

It seemed every time she came out of a room, there was a larger group of people than before, "Ai, what have I told you about collecting random strangers?" She teased to the red head.

"It's not my fault. I walk out the door, and they follow me!"

A round of laughter echoed through the room. Hotaru couldn't resist a glance at Kakashi, who had mysteriously already changed clothing. He was leaned against a nearby doorway, orange book in hand. He would chuckle when the group laughed, but other than that he seemed in a trance. It was a little disheartening, to say the least, to know he wasn't sneaking peeks back at her.

"Hotaru?" Her attention shot from Kakashi to Ai. Ai introduced the group, though honestly Hotaru was only half paying attention.

Who was it again? Sai, Lee, Tenten, Kiba, and of course, Naruto, Sakura, and Ino. She was sure her memory would fail her more times than once tonight. After just a moment, everyone formed a long line and filed out of Kakashi's apartment, heading down the street to a quaint restaurant that Hotaru wasn't sure would fit their entourage. Naturally, with these Konoha people, there were more waiting for them.

Add Kurenai, Aoba, and Genma to the list.

The sight of Kurenai made Hotaru's throat tighten. She'd heard of her, even seen pictures, but she never thought she'd actually be having dinner with the woman. A solemn mood took her for a moment.

They had to put three tables together to fit everyone in, but nobody complained. The first round of drinks was ordered as soon as everyone took their seats.

"To our guests," Kurenai raised her beer bottle and everyone followed suit and sipped.

"To Konoha," Aoba declared.

"To more booze," Genma laughed.

Everyone was having a good time. After dinner, most of the group had taken to the floor where they had turned up a radio and were dancing. Hotaru just watched Ai with a smile. It warmed her heart to see Ai in such a happy state. It was something Hotaru could never give her.

Kurenai bumped her elbow, "Care to dance? We're the only girls left sitting and its making me feel old,"

The two rose from their seats and headed for the growing crowd, music blasting from the counter nearby. The girls were dancing wildly about each other while the few boys stood swaying in the middle. Sai, in particular, seemed out of his element and mostly stood and stared at everyone looking baffled.

Hotaru let her self control loose for just the day. It was fine to make mistakes once in awhile. _He_ would never find out. She would just have fun and be happy today. She had kissed with passion and danced with all the goofiness in her. She couldn't remember the last time she had done something just because she wanted to.

Red hair skipped past and Hotaru caught Ai's arm, "We need to talk," She mouthed. Ai nodded in response, then lead her out to a patio section in the back.

Hotaru checked around them for any intruders to their conversation, then turned to her companion, "Things have changed," She spoke with a steel reserve, "We're going back. I'm not doing this anymore,"

Ai stared straight back at her, already understanding, "It's because you kissed isn't it?" Gold eyes shot up, "I overheard the guys talking. He kissed you."

Hotaru's eyes softened, ashamed at her weakness.

"You know what?" Ai gently touched Hotaru's cheek, "I think you deserve a shred of happiness," She shook her head lightly, "Actually, you deserve oceans of it, but a shred is what's dangling in front of you right now," She smiled, the purest smile Hotaru had ever seen. It was like she was seeing the little girl from years ago, "Take it,"

With that, she reentered the building, leaving Hotaru standing alone outside.

_Take it…_

She followed her friend back inside. Everyone had started taking drinking bets. Sai was bet he couldn't take four shots and still stand. He was sitting in a booth slumped over. Ino bet Sakura she couldn't chug a large beer before her. That didn't end well either.

Hotaru took her share of the games, out drinking Tenten and Kiba, but losing quickly after being challenged by Genma. Lee was _not_ allowed around the alcohol… for some reason or other.

Genma and Kakashi were in a league all their own. They challenged each other six times, all ending in ties, but on their last round, they each raised their glasses wobbly and made a toast.

"Asuma," They each bellowed before chugging the remainder of their drinks. Everyone else raised their glasses as well. Hotaru caught a glimpse of a tear in Kurenai's eyes.

The fun continued for another hour or two after they had left. Everyone started trickling out, some going out to the clubs, others going home to their beds. Kurenai needed to get home to "the little one". Kakashi was in a bad state, but the funny thing was that he was even a graceful drunk. Instead of stumbling around, he opted to sit in a booth. Instead of slurring nonsense, he sat quietly staring at the floor.

Hotaru offered to lug Kakashi home since she would have to stay there another night anyways. Ai followed Naruto, Kiba, Lee, and Genma out to a club with the promise of 'Don't wait up'.

Thankfully the walk back to his apartment wouldn't be long. He was heavy and definitely wasn't helping the situation.

She tossed him onto the couch as gracefully as she could. Unfortunately there was still an audible _thump_ when he hit. He groaned a bit and looked up at her. She sat down in the floor by his head and started stroking his hair, "How're you feeling?"

He mumbled something she couldn't understand, "I'm just going to take this off, okay?" He nodded as she slipped his hitai ate over his head and placed it on the table. Her slim fingers continued to smooth his silver locks and he turned his head towards her, inhaling deeply.

"D-did you just… smell me?" She questioned.

Kakashi smiled at her then sat up, "Thank you for bringing me home,"

Wait, he wasn't swaying or slurring at all, "You're not drunk are you?" He didn't answer, "_Are you?_" She ground out.

He smiled sheepishly at her, his left eye clamped shut, and scratched at the back of his head, "Sorry about that. I just don't like the club thing so I needed an escape route,"

"An… an _escape route_?" Her temper could rival that of Sakura's. It was a good thing she didn't use her fists like Sakura too.

Hotaru pushed herself off of the floor and stomped out of the living room. Of all the things for someone to do she had never had someone pretend to be drunk so she would carry them home… for an escape route.

Hotaru pounded into the bedroom and slammed the door shut. Forget etiquette, she didn't care if this wasn't her home. She was mad as hell and she wanted him to know it. She tore her clothes off as she hopped into bed, covering her bare legs under the covers. And just as she tugged the shirt over her head, the door flew open.

"Ka-"

But he was faster than her words were. Kakashi dove into her and kissed her as his body pressed her back into the mattress.

"I…" The words stumbled on her lips, "I hardly have clothes on," She insisted.

He growled, "You won't need them,"

His hand slipped from her bent knee up to her smooth thigh. The tips of his rough fingers skimmed the outline of her cotton panties and he kissed her through cloth. It was all so fast and she was instantly transported to earlier in the day; to before Naruto and Sakura and their friends had interrupted them.

She could feel between her legs getting hotter and wetter and his pelvis ground into her, teasing her with his touch. She bucked her hips up, encouraging more contact.

When that wasn't enough, Hotaru pulled her head back and reached for his face. She wanted to take his mask off; to kiss his lips without hindrance; to see his face without an obstruction.

But his hands caught her wrists, "I can't…"

The disappointment must've shown in her face because he spoke again, "But… there _is_ something I can do…"

"Do it," She replied without pausing. She wanted him and she wanted him now. Whatever it took for that to happen was fine with her. But when he opened his left eye and the brightness of the Sharingan shone back at her, she jumped.

"I won't hurt you," He soothed her by stroking her hair and neck. His mere touch was like fire against her flesh, "It'll temporarily take your sight so you won't see anything,"

She faintly nodded, her heart still racing in anticipation, and stared right at his Sharingan. The black lines started whirring in circles, starting out slow and lazy but increasing in speed. Then a yellowish color joined until it was only a blur of colors she could see. Then…

Nothing.

Everything went dark. Her breathing grew heavy, her chest rising and falling with each breath. Kakashi's hand stroked her neck and collarbone, "Like I said, its only temporary,"

Hotaru felt him lean back above her, the scraping of cloth against skin, and then he was back on her, pressing against her once more. The pressure was comforting and she realized that, with her sight gone, her other senses were on high alert. She was aware of the softness of the sheets on her feet; the rustling of his clothes as he moved to kiss her body. She could smell the booze and cigarette smoke on him as well as the shampoo he used in his hair. When he kissed her mouth, his tongue meeting her's, she could taste traces of bourbon and beer. She could feel the smooth wetness of his tongue.

Kakashi traced her outline with his hands as she felt his erect grow larger and push into her. Her legs rubbed against his hips, begging for his touch. The wetness below was increasing with every touch; every kiss.

Kakashi leaned back, sitting her up, and slid the shirt off of her, exposing her bare breasts. It was odd not seeing what was going on, but that was pushed from her mind as he covered her again, this time paying the most attention to her breasts. He dipped his head to one side and traced a circle around the areola. The cold of the room mixed with the warmth of his mouth caused her to gasp with pleasure. His hand sunk down low her hip and curved to her back, to cup her bottom. He raised her up, her core touching his chest. Hotaru's mouth parted in a moan at the contact. She was desperate for this. She needed this.

Kakashi's other hand slid to her thigh, grasping it firmly when his mouth finally made contact with her perky nipple. As he sucked and flicked with his tongue, his hand had found its way under her panties to her clit. The butt of his palm gently passed back and forth over her as he worked her breast.

Her breathing grew harder. Her panties grew wetter.

His fingers teased her entrance, swirling her juices around to coat the rest of her, the sticky wet sound making its way to her overly sensitive ears. She could feel Kakashi rise up and bring his face to her's, "Is _this_ what you want?"

He was asking again.

But this time he already knew the answer.

Simultaneously he took her mouth in a forceful way, his tongue diving into her mouth, as two of his fingers entered her below. Her gasp settled into a throaty moan. She felt a tingling start from her toes and rose from her legs to her stomach to her face.

His fingers drove in and out of her as he tongue fucked her mouth. His hips ground into her leg. The sucking sound coming from his fingers was getting louder as he went.

"Oh god…" She murmured in his ear as she sucked and nipped at her neck.

"God, I'm gonna cum," He responded as he sat back to remove her panties. There was more rustling of clothing that didn't last long before she felt him press into her again. But this time he was naked, too. She ran her hands up his arms and could feel his biceps bulging against his skin. She felt his chest muscles and they were just as toned.

Kakashi's hips pinned her against the mattress, threatening to enter her at any moment. His mouth took her's again as he started to press further and further until…

He filled her to the brim. Hotaru felt she would explode at any moment as Kakashi settled into a smooth rocking rhythm. He pushed in and out, in and out as he brought a hand up to smooth over her nipple. Every few pushes, he would lightly pinch and the pain cause her to hiss with ecstasy.

His rhythm was getting faster, "_Fuuuck…_" He groaned in her ear, "You're soaking,"

She continued to moan and gasp when he thrust into her, his hands tilting her hips upward for better entry. When they were both near climax, he pulled out of her, tugged her up, and flipped her over onto her hands and knees.

He didn't waste a second pushing back into her and resuming his rhythm. The thrusting was growing desperate know and she was just as frantic to get her release as he probably was to get his. Though she couldn't see, she could feel her losing balance and her head growing lighter.

Kakashi had one hand grasping a hip, determining the speed and force of entry, and the other hand curved around rolling her clit in his fingers. It felt like a dam had let loose between her legs. The combined force of his cock and the stimulation of her spot was too much to bear.

"Oh god! Oh god!" She panted as he drove even deeper, "I'm so close! So…" She trailed, unable to finish her own sentence.

Every sound escaped her ears as she climaxed. It felt like her body was a balloon that had been let loose and now she was flying through the sky. Everything went quiet in her ears as she released.

When she floated back down fro her high, she was laying against the sheets on her back, the warmth of Kakashi's body to her side. She heard a rustling and, "Kai,"

Hotaru's sight returned to her.

The first thing she saw was the wall next to the bedroom door; the second was Kakashi's re-masked face. She couldn't say she was disappointed that he hadn't forgotten to replace it, but at that moment, she couldn't care less.

He smiled back at her as he smoothed her damp hair, "Not my best work, but I _am_ a bit tipsy," He chuckled.

"Well," She smirked back at him, "You'll just have to prove that you can do better,"

Kakashi eyed her as if he was unsure of her motives. Both of his eyes were open now, his Sharingan glowing ferociously in the dimly light room. But it was somehow entrancing… and attractive. He had a story and that interested her. He had so much to him… and she wanted to know everything.

"Well, let me get some food and I'll see what I can do," He whispered as he leaned in to kiss her lips once more.

…

…...

…

**Note: Whew! That was longer than intended, but I hope it didn't disappoint. =) Please review!**


	6. Encounters

The blazing hot water of the shower felt good on her shoulders in the morning. She needed to wash off the guilt and shame and… sex. Hotaru massaged her stiff shoulders as the water beat down on her. A quick once over with the shampoo and soap, and she was out of the shower draped in a towel. She dressed quickly and tip toed out of the master bath.

She looked to the bed. Kakashi was fast asleep, masked face buried half way under a pillow, releasing an occasional snore or grunt. She couldn't help but to smile.

_Does he wear that thing all the time?_

But as much as she would love to stand here and watch him sleep like an adoring stalker, she needed to meet up with Ai to go to the Hokage's mansion.

The girls met at a tiny, six stool, restaurant nook on a side street. Ai was becoming way too familiar with the village. They took seats and that's when Ai, of course, started opening her mouth.

"Sooo…" She glanced sideways at her friend with a mischievous grin, "How was last night?"

Hotaru rolled golden eyes at the question, "You're an idiot. Miso soup, please, and some fruit," She told the young girl behind the counter.

Ai ordered the same, "Oh, please, you know as well as I do that something went down. Now, if we're going to stay here, we might as well get comfortable," And to emphasize her last statement she leaned against her elbows casually on the bar.

"We're _not_ staying here!" Hotaru hissed, "How many times do I have to tell you? Now drop it before you cause a scene!"

Ai's facial expression hardened, "I don't get why you're choosing bullshit over a decent life,"

"Death, Ai. We're talking a brutal fucking death here, okay? Now zip it,"

The food arrived and they gobbled it down like it was their last meal then paid and departed.

The Hokage's mansion was a few blocks away and they walked in silence, angry with each other for opposite reasons. Hotaru was the same as Ai's older, protective sister and, no matter how much she wanted to resist, she obeyed orders partially of loyalty and partially of ranking.

"Okay," Hotaru whispered to Ai, "Stick with the plan. We'll get in, get out and you'll have time for one more party before we head back,"

It wasn't a question, but Ai nodded anyway.

One second, the women were standing side by side and, in the blink of an eye, Hotaru had disappeared and Ai had pulled her kunai from her sheath and stabbed herself in her right thigh. She screamed with pain.

Okay, it was only about 40% real pain and the rest was great acting, but she needed the extra _oomph!_ To get as many people out of the mansion as possible.

It worked perfectly.

A swarm of people, all with the Leaf's symbol of hitai ate somewhere on their body came rushing out.

"What happened?"

"Oh my god!"

"Are you okay?"

Ai couldn't exactly remember what she told them. It was something about how "clumsy" she could be and how the pain was "unbearable". Was there a doctor around? Things of that nature. She was just the face of the operation so it didn't matter what the hell she said.

…

…

Gold eyes gleamed from the shadows of a room. She couldn't pin point where she was, but she knew she needed to make her way up.

The Hokage's office was her destination.

And she didn't have much time.

Throngs of people rushed past her and she could hear Ai screaming outside. Ai could be such a drama queen sometimes. Whenever a hallway would be clear, Hotaru would dart to another shadow in another corner or another room. Slowly she was making headway, but she still wasn't going fast enough. And, on top of that, Ai needed to make sure the Hokage left. It was pointless if she was still there.

"Is there a medic? No, no! This is _serious_!"

Bingo. Hopefully that would lead someone to grab Tsunade.

Annnd…

Blonde pigtails flew past, accompanied by a dense amount of grumbling.

Hotaru wasted no time and rushed to the door of the office. With one jiggle of the knob she could tell it was locked. But that was to be expected. She pressed her exposed right palm against the lock, forced a small but powerful amount of chakra into it and in half a second it was blown.

The door creaked open. When the people returned, they would assume the lock just malfunctioned or had gotten old. The chakra "bombs" were her specialty.

Hotaru peered around the room, trying to quickly evaluate where she should start investigating. The desk seemed like a suitable fit so she went there first.

The desk was piled high with papers. Mostly they were filled to the brim with trivial D and C rank missions for trivial up-and-coming ninjas. What she needed was good juicy info: war documents, treasury info, something stating how much man power they had or how many weapons they had in storage.

After shuffling through the majority of the desk, she decided to move on. The bookshelf caught her eye. Actually, one book in particular had her attention. It was an old, worn green book, maybe a dictionary, that protruded just an eighth of an inch from the others. If someone were detailed enough to keep all of their books lined up, why would one be sticking out. Even just a little?

With little time left, she took a chance on the moldy book and pulled it out. Only, it didn't come out. The book swung straight back, with four more attached to each side, revealing a locked cubby behind them. This was the jackpot.

Hotaru quickly blew open the lock, not damaging the outside at all and peered inside. It was a plethora of confidential documents. It contained probably about eight-hundred million dollars in information on Konoha… give or take, of course. But as she reached a gloved hand inside to retrieve what would be her next meal ticket, and most likely guarantee another five years of her life, her fingers stopped short.

She couldn't bring herself to grab them and take them from the safe. She thought, stupidly, of her family; of her past; of her present. Hotaru had done many, wicked things in her short life, but for some reason she couldn't do this one.

She slammed the safe shut, papers still trapped inside, and replaced the ratty book cover.

…

…...

The blonde Hokage stomped across the grassy area to Ai who lay helpless on the ground. She clutched her bleeding leg and continued to wail, "Ohhh! Oh, this hurts! Where's the medic?"

The Hokage loomed over her, casting a dark shadow with its shadowy hands on its shadowy hips.

"Oh… uhh…" Ai stammered at Tsunade glared at her.

"Damn wimp," Tsunade passed her hand over Ai's leg for all of three seconds and declared, "What and idiot. If someone calls me out here for something else stupid, I swear…" She announced to the crowd.

But, despite her statement, she resumed a half smile as she realized that she was temporarily free of Shizune and her paperwork. Now was her chance to escape, so she disappeared around a corner.

…

…

Hotaru stepped into the sunlight to find Ai sitting atop a stone made fence.

"How'd it go?" She asked.

Hotaru sighed, "I didn't find anything,"

"Bull," Ai shot back, "But I don't give a shit,"

Hotaru shook her head at her friend. Ai's temperament was a crazy maze sometimes, but she appreciated the "no bullshit" way she had about her. _Someone_ had to keep her sane in her chaotic life.

They walked - Hotaru disheartened and Ai irritatingly chipper - back to Kakashi's house. She knew they would have to say goodbye soon. And what was goodbye? She'd said it to so many people so many times in her life; she felt she'd lost the meaning. After all, she and Ai had only known him and his friends for a couple of days. She didn't belong here. It was time to leave.

"Hey, there's a shortcut here," Ai motioned to an alleyway near them, "I'm feeling lazy today,"

They agreed they would cut through the alley. Hotaru just wanted to get back to Kakashi's house, smell his skin, fell his touch, and forget all about her life that was swirling down the toilet.

Just as they rounded the corner, a forceful arm shoved Hotaru into the cement wall and pinned her neck. A tall, slender woman with jet black hair stood before her, their faces almost touching. The woman's body was smoky, dark plumes escaping an unknown source in her body. Her torso was concrete, but her limbs seemed to gradually turn to nothing but black puffs of choking air. Even her dark hair seemed to start at the root and gradually disappear to the ends.

A solid arm dug at Hotaru's throat, cutting off much of her oxygen, but a smoky arm held Ai at bay.

"You're been taking quite too long," The sinister looking woman hissed, "He's getting impatient. You know how he gets," She finished with a nonchalant tone.

Hotaru wished looks could kill because if they could, she would be sprouting daggers at this very moment and stabbing them into this woman's eyeballs, "We've got it under control. Now back off," She gave the smoldering woman a shove, causing her to stumble backwards and lose her grip on both girls.

The woman looked extremely flustered and deeply offended, "Just get your goddamn act together. I'm watching you," Her focus was only on Hotaru, as if they were bitter rivals, and she disappeared into a puff of smoke.

Hotaru let out a deep breath, "Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck,"

Ai looked just as worried and started pacing as she held her head with her hands.

Hotaru took control, "Okay… shit… okay, if Yakunan's clone is here, that means she's around," She looked to Ai with dread, "We have to leave, Ai. You know that,"

Ai looked downtrodden and disappointed, but in her heart she knew Hotaru was right. If Yakunan was sent here, then they were being watched. And that was bad. Very bad.

Hotaru gained her composure, still a little rattled at the fact that evil was lurking around the corner, "We've got to find out where she's hiding, then convince them its fine and just leave. Agreed?"

Ai was looking at the ground when she nodded. Her stance reminded Hotaru of a school girl who had just been told that she couldn't have ice cream before dinner. But they had to do what was best.

They took a minute to calm themselves before emerging from the haunting alleyway towards Kakashi's apartment. They would wait until nightfall then begin their search once everyone was fast asleep. They couldn't risk the truth coming out.

It was too damn dangerous… for everyone.


	7. Familiarities

**Author's Note: It's a little long and a little late, but I hope you guys will find it worthwhile. ;)**

…

…

The chill of the air conditioning in Kakashi's apartment blew across Hotaru's face as she cracked open the front door. Everything was silent. She and Ai ventured in, still feeling like intruders, searching for signs of life.

Nothing.

"He's not home," Hotaru spoke to Ai, breaking the piercing silence of the room.

Ai shrugged and sunk down into the cushions of the couch. She flipped his television on and proceeded to flip through the channels like she owned the place.

"What are you doing?" Hotaru chided.

Ai's head stayed motionless, focused on the TV, "I'm tired… I was up late last night," She saw Hotaru's stern expression reflected through a mirror on the wall, "I don't think he'll care,"

Gold eyes rolled in their sockets. Hotaru went to the front door and stepped out. She was too restless to sit around a Konoha apartment and watch TV. She felt she needed to… pace… or something.

A loud churning sound reverberated from her stomach.

Or maybe she would get lunch.

Her hand went to her pant's pocket and pulled out what little money she had floating around in there. Unfortunately, it wasn't too much. She'd probably have to get plain rice or something else cheap.

As she thought to herself, her feet moved of their own accord. They took her through Konoha's lively streets, past shops and villagers bustling about. The Leaf Village was just as he had described to her. And her heart broke at the thought that she would never be able to stay in the flourishing village.

When she looked up and, finally, noticed her surroundings, Hotaru saw a small shop with cloth coverings. It was a tiny ramen shop and it only had about six chairs.

She sighed. Ramen wasn't her favorite thing in the world, but she was hungry so she took a seat. A cheerful young woman greeted her.

"Pork miso, please," Hotaru told her and the girl scampered to the back where an older gentleman started cooking noodles.

Hotaru glanced around the shop, taking in the sights of the miniature decorative pictures and pricing signs lining the walls. She breathed in the smell of hot noodles and broth simmering on a stove. It was quaint, as you would expect, and quiet.

"Hey! Hotaru!" A loud voice yelped from behind.

She jumped and turned, furrowed eyebrows greeting a hyperactive blonde ninja.

"Oh, Jesus…" She exhaled, "Naruto, you're a loud mouth, you know that? How'd you ever get to be a ninja?" She only half teased.

He just smiled and ordered four bowls of what she was having – extra toppings, of course – and plopped down onto the stool next to her's.

"So did you ever get to see the Hokage?" He questioned.

Hotaru had totally forgotten that she was supposed to have a "council" with the Hokage, "Well… I saw her… briefly…" She fibbed, "Ai and I will have to leave soon," Naruto's spirits drooped, "Maybe tomorrow,"

Truthfully, though she wouldn't admit it even to herself, she didn't want to leave. If there was a way for her to make a whole new identity, she would.

"That blows," Naruto frowned.

They sat their in momentary silence, the mood of the afternoon brought down by thoughts of the near future. Thankfully, the Ramen Guy was quick. Their orders were placed in front of them in no time.

They replaced their depression with eating.

"This stuff is the best," Naruto said in between slurps. When Hotaru didn't reply, just kept picking at noodles and sipping broth, he added, "No… _really_,"

"Eh, I'm not a huge ramen person. It's okay,"

Naruto choked on his noodles. The shop went quiet.

The blonde's face went dead-serious as he turned to face her and said, "I can't be friends with someone who doesn't like ramen,"

She just returned his look, baffled by his seriousness, "…Wha… what? I didn't say I don't like it," His mood wasn't changing, "I mean, okay, I _do_ like it,"

His lips curved into a smirk and he lowered his head to his bowl again, apparently satisfied with her white lie.

She finished her bowl at about the time Naruto was finishing up his fourth, and final, bowl, "You're ridiculous," She teased him as she slurped down the remainder of the broth. They both sat back from the counter and held their full bellies.

"You know," Naruto started, his voice soft and, surprisingly adult-like, "Kakai-sensei really likes you,"

Hotaru sat up straight, blushing, "Naruto, I…"

"No, let me say this. He really likes you," He continued, "I've never seen him get attached to someone like that before. And I don't care if you guys have only known each other for an hour or a million years, I like that he's happy," Her throat felt like it was swelling and her mouth was getting dry; a tear formed in the corner of her eye, "I know you're from the Grass Village, but I think you guys could make it work…" He turned to face her head on, their eyes unwavering from each other's, "If you wanted to,"

Hotaru sat there, trying to take it all in. Was he… approving of… _them_? No, what was she thinking, there was no _them_. It was a fling. She'd had plenty before. It was time to move on. Even if she could find a way to escape her current life, he'd shudder at her past. He would hate her for it.

The sound of cloth rustling behind them caused them to turn. Kakashi stood in the sunlight, the small piece of the face showing revealed a smile, "There you are. I had to see the Hokage. When I got back, Ai was there. By the way, she owes me $14.99," Hotaru looked confused, "Did you know she watches hard-core porn?"

Everyone laughed at Ai's expense and Naruto stood up to leave. Hotaru grasped his wrist to stop him, pulling him down closer to her, "You're going to do great things," She whispered quickly before releasing him. He gave her a confident smile and nodded before departing.

"Bye, Hotaru! Bye, Kakai-sensei!"

Kakashi turned to her, "What'd you whisper?"

"Nothing," She smiled.

He held out a hand to her and she took it, the feeling of his skin against her's sending a warm spark through her arm and down her ribs.

"I thought I'd take you back to the river," He spoke cheerfully.

"Kakashi!" A man's voice broke through their moment.

Another well-built Konoha ninja stood outside the shop, calling to Kakashi. He looked confused, and a bit concerned, but stepped out to meet him anyway. Hotaru crossed her arms and leaned her hips against the counter of the ramen shop. They were a small distance from her, but she could hear bits of their conversation.

"What are you doing with that girl, Hatake?" The ninja demanded.

"Keeping an eye on her. There's no problem here," Kakashi replied coolly.

"The fuck there's not!" His voice was growing louder in his frustration, "She's a foreign ninja. Do you know any damn thing about her?"

Evidently Kakashi had convinced him to stay hushed because a crowd had started to form. She couldn't hear much more of their conversation. Then she heard 'slut' and, like it was in slow motion, she saw Kakashi's right arm pull back and whip forward into the man's face.

Blood was everywhere. Somehow he had managed to break his nose _and_ his jaw.

"Talk about multi-tasking," Hotaru murmured as Kakashi unlocked his front door.

"Yeah, well.."

He was, unsurprisingly, in a sour mood. An even larger crowd had come and were amazed to witness that the Copy Ninja had broken the face of a fellow Leaf ninja. And over a girl. A foreign _ninja_ girl.

Hotaru sat Kakashi down on the sofa next to Ai who was flipping through the channels again.

"Scram!" Hotaru ground out and Ai was off the couch and out the door before Hotaru had time to get a pack of ice. Kakashi had gotten the first punch and won, but the guy didn't go down without a fight. Kakashi had a black eye to show for his stubbornness.

She brought the ice and sat down next to him, releasing an irritated sigh, "You shouldn't have done that," She whispered at she pressed the ice gingerly against his skin, "Not for me. That was stupid,"

"Thanks," He responded sarcastically.

He removed his hitai-ate to allow more room for the ice pack. Hotaru kept attending to him with the ice, her expression softening slightly with every passing minute.

"I meant it," He spoke.

She stopped, bringing the ice down to her lap, "Don't say that," She pleaded, "Don't say foolish things like that,"

Without a word, Kakashi moved his hand over her's and brought it to the edge of his mask. One of his rough, large fingers pressed over her small, smooth one and threatened to pull his mask down.

His movements paused, "It's going to sound crazy," He started, one black eye and one red eye staring right back at her deep yellow ones, "I know we've only known each other for days, but I feel like I've known you all my life. You know about Obito and Rin. You know about…" His voice cracked, "You know about my dad,"

Subconsciously her body tried to escape his touch. Her face was creasing with sadness. She knew what he wanted to say.

"I think… I think we should try to make this work. I think…" He sucked in a quick breath, "I think I lo-"

"Stop. Just _stop_," She pulled her hand back, "Save it for someone else; someone who can give something back," Her eyes had gained a foreign strength, "I can't stay here... and you can't come with me. That's it,"

He sat there without making a noise; without moving. His body and mind was seemingly frozen in time. Had he heard her?

"I understand," He told her, "But still… I want to show you something," His hand grabbed her's again quickly and returned it to his mask. Just as she felt her fingertips slid the black fabric down and below a chin, she turned her head and slammed her eyes shut.

"Please don't," _I don't deserve this._

His warm, rough hand reached around to feather over the side of her jaw. It gently turned her head towards him.

She slowly opened her eyes.

His face wasn't anything out of a movie. There weren't mysterious scars or giant moles or whole cheeks missing from their toothy counterparts. For lack of a better word, his face was average. His nose was curved downward ever so slightly. He had about two days worth of silvery stubble growing along his cheeks and chin. His top lips were light pink and thin; his bottom was fuller. The aching truth of the youth in his face, though he was older than Hotaru, was apparent. Despite his silvery gray hair, Kakashi didn't have any wrinkles around his eyes or lines framing his mouth.

And, for all this "average", she couldn't help but stare. He was the most beautiful person she had seen. You could see his strength in his jaw line and the smoothness in the lips.

"You're staring," He chuckled, interrupting her.

"Why…?" She couldn't take her eyes off of his lips, "Why show me? I'm still the same person,"

"Not to me," He said as a matter of factly.

Kakashi, black mask now draped along his neck, leaned forward and took her in his arms. His lips pressed against her's and she took him graciously. Her eyes stayed open and focused on his, relishing in the fact that she could see him as he kissed her now as opposed to "temporarily blind".

She took control and pressed him back against the arm of the couch with her body. As she straddled him with her hips, she leaned in him and whispered, "You know it can't last right?"

"We'll make it count," He whispered back before she took his lips again.

Their bodies exchanged white heat as they kissed and fondled each other. His hands were gripping each cheek of her butt, encouraging the slow grind her hips had started. She kissed his covered mouth and had started to suckle on his exposed ear lobe when he told her, "Maybe we should hold off on this," Hotaru sat up, "I should really be filling out my weekly paperwork… that was due… a week ago,"

She chuckled at him, "You mean you want to read some more? What _is_ it about those books?"

He blushed and sat up. She moved to the couch cushion to accommodate him.

"No, I really do need to do it," Kakashi rose and headed for the master bedroom, "Let me take a shower first and I'll finish it quickly. Then, we can get back to…" He turned to give her a mischievous look that was only intensified by his menacing red eye and scar, "What we were doing…"

Then he disappeared.

Hotaru crossed her arms with a huff. Just because they really _shouldn't_ be having a relationship of any kind didn't mean that she wasn't hella horny right now. But, almost instantly, a light bulb went off inside her frustrated little head.

She ran to the bedroom and went to the bathroom door. The water was running and bits of steam were escaping from under the wooden door. She waited patiently until the sound of streaming water was cut off then pressed her bare palm to the door knob.

_Click._

She twisted the knob silently.

Kakashi reached a bare, wet arm out of the shower and grabbed for a towel hanging nearby. He rubbed his face, neck and hair with it then draped it across his neck and stepped out. When he looked up, Hotaru was leaned against the door frame, only wearing a pair of lacy blue panties and a strapless black bra.

"I couldn't wait," She said smugly, knowing he wouldn't be able to resist the half-naked bait.

He let out a chuckle and lunged for her. Kakashi pressed her against the frame, picking her up as she wrapped her legs around his waist. His naked body was forceful as his bare mouth explored her lips and neck. The desperation was evident in the way they blindly groped each other's bodies. Kakashi's large, rough hands rubbing over her breasts and her ass. Hotaru squeezed his biceps and ran her palms against his pecs and abs. The humidity of the bathroom caused the heat in their bodies to grow hotter. A slick sheen of sweat covered their bodies.

She could feel Kakashi press his hard cock against her core. Her panties were soaking at this point; the earlier session now combining with the raw energy of this one was building inside her. She moaned and gasped as he nipped at her shoulder.

Kakashi grabbed a better hold of her and sat her on top of the bathroom counter, locking her between the steamed up mirror and his naked body. She moaned, louder still, at this sudden move and he could feel himself twitch at her evident pleasure, "What do you want?" He teased as his hands reached around to unhook her bra. It fell to the counter and he flicked it off with a quick movement of his hand.

Hotaru didn't answer, too caught up in the moment to respond. His mouth moved to her breast and he started to lap and suck at a nipple as his hand pleasured the other. He paused only to repeat his question, "What do you _want_?"

She scrambled to make her brain work, "Oh… oh, god… I want you to fuck me," She looked him in his mismatched eyes and drawled his name, "_Kakashi_,"

The corner of his lips twisted into a smirk. Then, suddenly, He stood up, grabbed her, and placed her standing on the floor facing the mirror. She could see the devilish look in his eyes; one that made her shudder. He yanked her blue panties down and she stepped out of them as gracefully as she could handle. Kakashi leaned his back into her, his long cock sliding against her clit as he commanded, "Hands here," He placed her hands a foot apart to grip the edge of the counter, then he sunk down low.

Lower and lower.

She gasped loudly when she felt his hair brush against her rear and felt a tongue start to lick at her opening.

"Mmm…" He smacked his lips with delight, "You're already so _wet_,"

Just as Hotaru thought her legs would give out, Kakashi supported her by gripping her thighs. His tongue worked magic, alternating between lapping at her core to suckling gently on her clit. The velvety wetness stroked against her southern lips then twisted circles around her clit. She gripped the edge of the counter even more. She couldn't tell for her blurring vision, but she thought they may have turned white.

Then she felt one hand removed from her thigh. He placed two fingers to her soaked opening and rubbed them in her juices.

"Oh… fuck…" She groaned; the heat inside her unbearable, "Why are you teasing me?"

She could hear a faint laugh then he drove his fingers deep inside of her. She screamed briefly at the intrusion, but he didn't miss a beat as he started to finger fuck her as he lapped at her clit. She was throbbing now. The edge of her orgasm was inching closer with every thrust of his hand. Soon, he added a third finger and she almost lost her grip on reality.

Just as she was about to peak, he interrupted, "Not yet," He told her as he stood and placed himself behind her. Without warning he bent her over more and drove his hard cock into her. She screamed louder this time.

Kakashi drilled into her, going as deep as he could with every thrust. We he said he would make it count, he meant it. His movement grew faster and faster. Her peak was so close, "Oh please… fuck…" Her mind wasn't thinking clearly anymore. The only destination for her thoughts was release. Her breasts bounced hard with every thrust and Kakashi reached around to cup one and twist a nipple with his fingers.

Hotaru screamed with her orgasm. It rushed through her like a fire had been set to her insides. She could feel the juices start to leak down her thighs, but she didn't care. Her muscles rippled with her release and gripped Kakashi's erection with force.

He grunted a "_Fuck…_" Before claiming a release of his own. As they started to drift back to reality, Kakashi withdrew from her hot core and flipped her to face him. She was spent and her head lolled from side to side. He gently cupped either side of her face and kissed her lovingly on the lips. The salty wet taste of sweat on his lips entered her mouth as she kissed him back. More was said in that kiss than an entire novel could write. They spoke of forbidden love and desire; of past and future; of loyalty…

Kakashi loosened his hold on her and scooped her into his arms. He walked from the steamy bathroom and carried her into the living room to lay her out on the couch. She smiled, a hazy look of appreciation glowing in her eyes. Then Kakashi retreated to the bedroom for less than a minute.

He returned wearing loose sweatpants and a _very_ fitted old Anbu shirt.

"Why are you wearing that mask again?" She chaffed, still hazy eyed.

He scooped her up again and laid them down, her on to top of him, back onto the couch, "Hmm… I guess you never know who's looking in the windows," He smirked as he started to stroke her hair.

She rolled her eyes at him and laid her head down on his chest, "You're such a freak," She laughed.

…

…

"You're such an _idiot_!" Sakura wailed at Naruto as she stormed up the steps in front of him.

Naruto followed behind her like a puppy, laughing.

Green eyes rolled as Sakura kept stomping until she reached Kakashi's floor. She stopped at his doorway and suddenly turned to the blonde who almost smacked straight into her, "Just shut up. No more talking. Got it?"

She didn't wait for a reply and knocked on the door. When there was no answer she tried the knob, "It's unlocked," She whispered to Naruto and instantly they were on their guard.

They crept into the entranceway, taking in their surroundings in case of danger.

"Maybe Sensei's playing a trick on us," Naruto whispered to his companion.

Sakura stopped, too worried to keep going. Naruto took the lead from there, passing Sakura and gently taking her hand to lead her. She blushed briefly at this contact, but didn't release his hand.

They snuck around a corner, coming into the living room. The sounds of breathing could be heard.

Naruto led Sakura further into the room, creeping closer to the couch. He leaned over cautiously to peer over the edge and…

Kakashi laid there, fully clothed asleep, but the real shock was what was on top of him. Hotaru was naked, only a sheet draped across her lower half, lying face to face with their sensei. She was nestled snugly between his legs and just as asleep as Kakashi was.

Naruto jumped back and tried to backpedal before Sakura caught a glimpse of what he had seen.

It didn't work.

Sakura's bright green eyes grew three sizes too big and she clamped a hand over her mouth before a sound escaped. Naruto recognized when he needed to get out so he wheeled her around and headed to the door as quickly as they could without unintentionally waking the source of their issues.

"That was… Oh my god… We should _not_ have seen that!" Sakura exclaimed as she paced the sidewalk outside.

She looked to her old team mate for reassurance but she was met with a smug look that said he was happy his old sensei had gotten laid.

"You… you _idiot_!" She yelped before a punch went flying at him. Luckily he dodged in time, "I'm… I'm going to see Ino…" She muttered as she dropped her hand and shuffled off in the opposite direction.

Of course, Naruto just followed her.


	8. Mournings

Hotaru exited Kakashi's apartment and walked down the hall like the owned the place. The day had wrapped up fairly uneventfully. They had woken up, eaten, dressed (at least on her part), then Kakashi had been summoned to see the Hokage. Hotaru has stuck around for awhile, scoping out his place like an obsessive fan. He only displayed two pictures in his entire home – his old team, and his new, broken-up team. Though, with her expert detective skills, Hotaru had found the picture of his parents on their wedding day slid into an Icha Icha book in a cluttered drawer. Her throat stung at the intrusion, but she had been compelled to stare at the picture for quite some time.

Kakashi's father looked just like him, though Kakashi had his mother's eyes. They were the only two people in the photograph. She was dressed in a flowy white dress and, he, in his best outfit. Their arms were interlocked and they gazed at the photographer with sparkling adoration in their eyes. It was a shame that she saw so much hurt in Kakashi's.

With him out of the place for at least a couple of hours and nightfall swooping in, Hotaru considered it to be as great a time as any to scope out the outer skirts of the village for the she-devil Yakunan.

Getting out of the village wasn't a difficult feat. The two guys that usually guarded the entrance were arguing about something insignificant and she slid along the shadows. The air outside the walls seemed heavier, but maybe that was just her heart dropping at the realization of her situation. When he had approached her over a year ago, she should have kicked his ass and walked on.

But you can't take anything back.

And now he was too dead for her to apologize for the bit of his life she had leeched off.

Sticking close to the wide trunks of trees, Hotaru made her way along the fencing. She knew they had to be close. Yakunan could send a smoke clone to a distance, but even she had a limit to her capabilities.

She used her every sense to try and track the woman down. They had all been trained well how to keep hidden. After all, it was their job to be sneaky bastards. She sniffed the air, detecting a hint of campfire scent and stopped.

"Yakunan," She spoke as if the person was clearly standing in front of her.

It was difficult to tell in the darkness of the woods, but billows of smoke came together from nowhere. They connected slowly at first then grew faster and thicker until a full blown person was standing before her.

"You were always good at finding me," Yakunan drawled with a deceiving grin, "Naughty girl, what are you doing out here? Your job's inside,"

Hotaru kept her composure though her instincts told her to run and save herself. Yakunan had that effect on people, "I came to ask you a similar question. Go back. We looked, there's nothing here. The bitch is keeping everything well hidden," The smoky woman's face didn't alter, "If we stay any longer they'll suspect, "Hotaru finished, her face just as steeled.

Yakunan pondered this a moment before a sly smirk drug itself across her lips, "Mmm… I see," Her eyes flicked to Hotaru, "You've found yourself a playmate. Cut it off," She snarled suddenly, "We're leaving,"

She turned her back to Hotaru and took a few steps, "It's not like that. He's just a quick fuck," Hotaru shot back.

The smoky figure paused and she turned her head just enough for Hotaru to see on black eye, "I'm sure that's right,"

Then she vanished.

She took a deep inhale before turning on her heels and returning to the village gates. Her legs willed her to sprint with everything in her, but she knew if Yakunan was still lingering in the blackness, it would give her away completely.

She re-entered in the same manner she had left. The two men were still arguing about something incredibly stupid, too absorbed in their feud to notice a dark figure slipping along the inner walls.

She felt she couldn't return to Kakashi's apartment just yet. If he were there, she wasn't sure what she would do. She wanted to tell him the truth; how she was a conniving liar; how she was lying to _him_. But nothing good would come from it.

So she decided to wander. Hotaru was a wanderer by nature, she felt. She might not have been had her parents not been killed, but that day the whole nature of her being changed. She would never have a home.

Hotaru crossed her arms over the chest to shield herself from the cold. The wind had picked up and was tousling her chestnut locks around her face and neck. She looked up and, just over a hill was the graveyard.

She entered it.

Truthfully, Hotaru was far beyond unworthy to enter this sacred resting place, but she couldn't help but search to satisfy her curiosity. She had to look for _him_. She started with first names, unable to remember his last. But this proved fruitless.

_Think, think._

She willed her brain.

_What the hell was his last name…?_

She wandered up and down the rows in the dark; the only available lighting was the half-moon standing watch in the sky. Thick blades of grass crunched below her sandaled feet, the wind whooshed through the trees on the edge of the property.

Then she found it.

Her heart skipped a beat. She idly wondered if he could see her now, crouched by his grave marker in the wind at night. He would probably laugh at her. And, though she knew she shouldn't grieve nor had any right to, tears started to stream down her cheeks.

She had spent many days and nights with this man. He had done so much for her and yet she was his enemy from the start. She shouldn't have yelled at him before he left that day. That stupid man. That stupid, considerate, caring man.

_Sarutobi, Asuma._

…

…...

Kakashi stepped out of the Hokage's office, jammed a hand in his pocket and proceeded to stroll down the main street while religiously reading his Icha Icha as he always did. He could imagine Sakura and Naruto now: _'Why do you always have that with you?' How are you reading in the middle of the night with no freaking lights, Kakai-sensei?'_

He chuckled internally at the thoughts of his former students. He loved them as much as he felt he could love anyone.

But there was Hotaru.

She did something to him he couldn't explain. He felt he knew her his entire life. But how could he? They grew up in separate regions. They weren't the same age. She'd never been to Konoha before. It was a mystery.

It was a mystery that he, for some reason, had decided to go with. He was getting older now. He didn't want to go his whole life alone. Maybe it was finally time to settle down. She was from the Grass Village, but the Leaf and the Grass had good relations. It shouldn't be a problem for them to work something out. People did it all the time.

…

…...

Hotaru made her way down the street again, her gloved left hand forcing wet streaks from her eyes. She came to the memorial stone where deceased ninja's names were etched into the rock. She paused in front of it. Lights were focused on the front and two sides, the indentations casting eerie shadows on the stone.

"Yo," Came a deep voice, invisible to her.

"I thought I'd find you here," She spoke to the voice.

Fabric rustled and Kakashi appeared from the back of the memorial, sliding one of his treasured books into his pants pocket. He gave her a signature eye crease and a wave.

"Do you always make it a habit of being so cheerful when you're reading porn behind a sacred memorial?" She bit.

His expression turned solemn as he moved to stand beside her and face the stone. She wanted to apologize for bringing the mood down, but she wouldn't. The place was actually really depressing. You know you're lonely when you keep company with the dead.

"Nearly everyone that's important to me is here," He spoke softly beside her, indicating the memorial.

She thought it would be nice to have a stone for her loved ones, too, "I'm a horrible person," She started, her gaze not faltering from the rock. His didn't either, "I've forgotten what they look like – my parents," Her throat stung as she said this, "They were everything… and I've forgotten them,"

He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close. His clothed chin rested on the top of her head, "Just the fact that you had a hard time saying that tells me you haven't forgotten,"

Hotaru mourned silently for her wasted life while her lover held her in the dark. She imagined that they were a depressing sight – her sobbing against the chest of a man while they spoke of dead loved ones and past wars.

…

…

Kakashi took her back to his apartment. They walked in silence for what seemed an eternity. Each understood the other's pain, though they were different. They each held responsibility for the deaths of more than enough people and couldn't find the resolve they needed to pick up the pieces and move on. At night, they each mourned for their dead. And, at night, they each died a little more.

It was Kakashi who spoke up first, "So," The silence of the night was rippled by his voice, "You still haven't done what you came here for…" He looked to her as they walked and she felt a single dark eye pierce her thoughts, "Have you?"

Hotaru licked her lips, "No, you're right. But we'll talk to the Hokage first thing in the morning," She assured him.

A heavy mood beset them. The realization set in that she would be leaving.

""You could stay, you know," He stopped in the middle of the road and stuck a hand into his pocket. His body assumed his natural slouched position.

She inhaled sharply, "You know that wouldn't work, Kakashi,"

They both stopped. She rarely said his name. It felt weird on her tongue and, by the looks of it, it felt weird in his ears as well.

"You won't try," He replied coolly, not giving up his nonchalant demeanor.

"I can't. I _can't_. You're not understanding this. There's too much to this you don't know about," She tried to persuade.

"Then tell me,"

A sigh escaped her lips. She realized how exhausted she was, "It's not that simple,"

He gave her a look that said it all. He didn't believe her. If she would just speak the words it would be done and they could move on. But the demons inside her were too dark and too deep to let go of. If he knew about her; what she had done, he would kill her. They would, honestly, start a brawl right here in the middle of Konoha.

That definitely couldn't happen.

Hotaru stood in front of him, just inches from each other, "Please, just believe me," She asked, all of her emotion – her hurt, her love, her sorrow, her vulnerability – put into those words.

A simple nod was returned to her.

She closed her eyes as she slowly pressed into his lips. It was a soft, lingering kiss that held too much sadness for it to be sexual. It was a kiss that asked him to accept the way he saw her now.

And he did.

When they parted, she had told him to go ahead without her. She was going to find Ai and bring her back for one more night at his apartment before they left the next day. He reluctantly agreed and headed in the opposite direction.

She turned on her heels and aimed for the strip of bars along the main street. Hotaru assumed her fiery-haired companion would be holed up in a booth somewhere taking on drinking bets with the guys. She ran her fingers through her hair as she floated down the street.

One more night with him.

He'd be waiting for her at his place.

But she wouldn't show up.

…

…

Hotaru glided up to the check-in desk of the ratty motel, "One room, please. One bed,"

The attendant gave her a wink, "Gotcha, sweet cheeks,"

She ignored this comment and, instead, focused on keeping a strong hold of Ai.

"What in the holy hell are we doing?" Ai hissed to Hotaru, "Why don't we just go back to Kakashi's? He has a nice TV,"

Hotaru ignored her as well. Her mind was only focused on what she had to do and replying to a guy's idea that she was a lesbian about to check in for some action and Ai's constant pestering were _not_ in the plan.

She snatched the rusty key from the attendant and tugged Ai down the hall. When they were inside, she motioned her friend to sit on the bed. Ai was notably confused, but followed the lead.

Hotaru sat next to her, avoiding eye contact to stare at the blank wall across the room.

"What are you…?" Ai started but it was cut off by a stabbing in her hip. She looked down to see Hotaru holding a syringe. The thin needle disappeared under her skin. Her eyes flicked up to Hotaru, worry and uncertainty crossing her face.

Hotaru said nothing. She pressed her hand in Ai's back and another on her chest to lay her down. She brought a pillow under her head.

"I'm so sorry for this…" Hotaru whispered, her eyes sparkling with tears.


	9. Truths

**I hope you guys still like this. I apologize for my sporadic updating. I have a lot of irl stuff going on, but I'm still going! =) Please review!**

…

…

Ai lay back on the cover of the bed. Her skin felt cotton candy light on her body. Her head was swimming in a foggy haze. She looked to Hotaru for comfort.

"It's nothing serious," Shining yellow eyes met her's, "You'll be asleep for an hour… maybe two,"

Hotaru kneeled on the floor beside the bed. She clutched Ai's hand and squeezed, though the red-head could barely notice. As she brushed back pieces of hair that fell, Hotaru spoke in a soft, humbled voice.

"I've been such a selfish person,"

Ai turned her head slightly and furrowed her eyebrows in lieu of shaking her head ferociously.

Hotaru could read her friend like a wide-open book, "Just listen. Please," Urgency caused her voice to crack slightly; her eyes reflected inner demons clawing their way out, "When I met you… back then, I saved you because I needed someone. You weren't the first he brought around," She swallowed hard; her throat dry as a bone, "I never said anything to him about the other girls. Only you,"

Hotaru paused, the stinging in her throat and eyes getting worse at the thoughts of her horrible life she had lead. How had it come to this? How had she let herself get so overcome?

"I was so caught up in… in survival. I lost every bit of myself that I had," A tear streak flashed down the side of Ai's cheek. She had lost movement now. Her eyes were starting to feel heavy.

"I wasted it. I wasted every damn bit of what I had. I used people. I killed people. I stole. I lied. And what do I have to show for it?" A hint of cold bitterness and disappointment swept over her voice, mingling with the grief, "Not a fucking thing," She whispered, "Everyone's dead… except you,"

Paled pink lips parted and Ai took a deep breath.

"That's why I'm leaving you here,"

Ai's eyes flashed as wide as she could get them. Her head remained motionless, staring at the crackled ceiling in vain.

Hotaru leaned forward and kissed her friend's soft cheek. The salty taste of tears brushed her lips and tongue, "Live," She spoke just before darkness took Ai's remaining vision.

…

…...

Kakashi sat on his living room sofa, anxiously jumping at every sound. It wasn't like him to be wound so tight that he couldn't sit back and take in some quality Icha Icha time. But he had a sinking feeling he should be running.

He scoffed at himself.

_Running? Where?_

He wanted to pass it off as ridiculous. But, then, his instincts had never been wrong.

A bird tapped frantically at his window. He thought briefly that the damn bird might actually break glass.

The bird didn't calm, though, even once the window was open and it was free to dart around the room. It landed on Kakashi's sleeved elbow. The bird wore the crest of the Hokage.

He groaned.

Being summoned at this time of night was the worst. It was probably paperwork related and, frankly, he just didn't feel like dealing with that nonsense. Especially not when he had such little time with Hotaru. He had so many questions for her. He definitely wanted to get to the bottom of her strange behavior before.

The bird pecked at his wrist.

_No choice, I guess._

He scribbled a quick note to Hotaru that he would be home shortly.

'_Don't go anywhere.'_ He concluded. And was out the door.

Of course, the walk to the Hokage mansion was a leisurely one, but he wasn't nearly as late as he would normally be. You know you've fallen for a girl when you can't even read Icha Icha properly.

He pushed open the office door and resumed his usual stance. His hand was lounging in his pocket and he leaned back on one foot, but his expression turned hard and serious when he saw Tsunade's.

She held up a single scrap of paper. It was messy. It looked like it had been hastily ripped from a book and, on it, only a single word was scratched.

"What in the hell is this…?" Tsunade pushed it to his face, her face revealing an unsettling amount of dread and worry.

On the paper, in bold marker it read:

_Kakashi._

…

…

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

It took several seconds for the door to open even a crack. Shining light from the apartment soaked the hallway where Hotaru stood – face to face with Kurenai.

"I'm sorry to bother you when it's so late," God, it had to be around one or two in the morning at this rate.

Kurenai looked noticeably surprised at her presence, "N-no… no trouble. The baby was up anyway," As proof she held up an infant that squished her eyes and cooed.

"She's beautiful," Was all she could murmur.

Kurenai smiled at this compliment.

"I just…I just…" She had planned a whole speech on her way over here. Why wasn't any of it coming out? She was such a damn coward.

"I know who you are," Kurenai spoke with all the understanding of a goddess. Hotaru was floored. Her eyes remained fixed on the floor, wide a saucers for her surprise. It was her understanding that everything was confidential.

Tears stung her eyes as she spoke, "I wanted you to know that he saved me… in more ways than one," She mustered up the courage it took for gold eyes to meet red, "I can't even find words for how sorry I am that all this happened. It would've been better had we never met…"

Hot tears shone in Kurenai's eyes as well. For a moment, neither of them could move nor speak. The silence cradled them in a soft blanket of security. Even if it was only for a little while. In this brief space of time, they both understood the circumstances. They both understood the heartache.

Hotaru inhaled sharply, "I can't stay. I just wanted to pay my respects," Then she gave a quick bow and seemingly disappeared by magic.

….

….

Kakashi was clearly confused by the note.

"I said what the hell is this, Kakashi?" Tsunade repeated herself, her voice starting to give to desperation, "Do you know anything about it?"

He shook his head calmly, "I don't understand why a note with my name on it is any reason to summon me in the middle of the night," He spoke plainly.

The Hokage ignored his comment and gave way to pace the floor in front of him. Shizune and one other male ninja stood in a corner, oblivious to the situation, but concerned for Tsunade's sake.

The steady _tap, tap, tap_ of a woman's heeled shoes could be heard outside in the hallway. All three of them grew silent and still, listening to the sound grow closer and closer.

_Tap. Tap. Tap._

They exchanged glances at one another, each silently questioning why on earth someone would be walking around the hallways at this time of night.

The door blew open with a gust of wind and, on the opposite side, stood a tall slender woman. She was dressed in a strange way – like a circus ringleader. She had a woman's tailored jacket complete with tails in the back, black tights that smoothed over every curve of her lean legs, high heeled black boots that grazed the mid-thigh. She even had a top hat teetering on her head.

Kakashi raised an eyebrow at her costume-y get-up. Meanwhile the other two Leaf nin stood guard in front of Tsunade.

"Who are you?" Tsunade ground out through gritted teeth. It was obvious this woman belonged here as much as a kitten belonged in a dog house.

The woman's dark gray eyes flicked up and landed straight on Kakashi. She walked to him as if no one else was in the room.

"So this is the famous Hatake Kakashi…" She purred. Her movements were fluid; smoke escaping from a chimney, "You we had to go through a whole training course…" She reached him and placed a finger on his chest, "Just. For. You," And she let her fingers dance to his chin with each word. She bit her lip like she was fighting back the urge to fuck him right there where he stood, then she smirked and started hovering circles around the room. She let fingertips touch books on the shelf as she spoke.

"You think you know what you're doing, but you're terribly, terribly wrong,"

"Who are you?" Kakashi spoke with clear authority.

The mysterious ring leader glanced at him over her shoulder, "Names aren't necessary. I'm just here to retrieve my comrades and I'll be off,"

Shizune and her ninja friend had backed Tsunade to the farthest edge of the room behind Kakashi. Unmistakable confusion crossed his face, "And you… need us to get them for you?"

The woman laughed, "Oh, no. I just wanted to see your face when I tell you the truth,"

"And that is…"

"Hatake Kakashi… you're sleeping with the enemy, my friend,"

She let out a bellow of laughter, but Kakashi stood silent. Wide eyes were glued to the floor.

"That girl, Hotaru, and her friend Ai… Well, I hate to break it to you, Sweet Cheeks," She swiveled on her hips to face him head on, "But they're criminals,"

She tossed a thick book onto the desk where Kakashi leaned. He dared to look at it.

Inside was a picture of Hotaru. Her hair fell around her shoulders and dominated the bottom part of the head shot. Her eyes were more devious than he had ever seen them.

It was a picture of her in the bingo book.

Hotaru was in the fucking bingo book.

"Now, if I can just remember her list of crimes…" She twisted her face as though she was thinking with all her might. A finger that disappeared halfway down into smoke came up to tap her chin, "Oh right. Extortion, bribery, kidnapping, espionage… murder," Sinister gray eyes looked to Kakashi for his reaction, but he gave none. He just continued to stare at the bingo book with confusion.

The woman went to him and pressed against his body like a lover would. She leaned into his neck and stroked his chest.

The world seemed to have disappeared. If you had asked him at that moment what day it was or what time it was, he couldn't have answered. He was stuck in a daze, staring at her picture; staring at a totally different person than what he had known. He'd had sex with this woman. He'd told her about his past and his uncertain future. He'd held her trembling body in the middle of the night when she had awoken from nightmares.

But now she stared back at him with a look of death. She looked like she would crawl out from the pages and kill him with her own two hands.

Who was this person?

What was he thinking?

The smoky woman continued to drag her hands along his body, daring to venture lower until he reached his hips. She ground against him, panting and moaning.

Kakashi pulled back his arm and punched her. A distinctive _crack_ resounded throughout the room and he could hear a frightened squeak from Shizune behind him.

The woman stumbled back. She was slouched over and her feet had lost their grounding, but it was obvious that her neck was broken. It was dangling to her side.

When any other person would have dropped to the floor and screamed in pain, she shocked them with another villainous laugh. She stood upright, her head still swiveling from its correct post, and quickly snapped it back into place with a jolt of her shoulder.

The three Konoha nin stood in shock of what she had just done. Except for the swelling, bruised section on her jaw, it was like nothing had happened.

"Just send her back," She snarled to Kakashi, "Cast her out,"

Her body evaporated where she stood.

Kakashi stood, too numb to move, but when he turned his head to look at his Hokage, he found he slumped over in a chair. She held her face in her hands and, though she wasn't sobbing, was clearly hiding something. Guilt?

Shizune spoke with the male ninja, "Find them. Fine them now,"

And they both quickly disappeared from the room.

Kakashi just looked on at Tsunade. She was as still as a statue, sitting in her chair. She made no sounds. She only sat with her face in her palms.

"Kakashi," She spoke softly, "You have no idea what's going on here,"

But before she could explain further he fled the room. He just needed to find Hotaru and… and…

What? Kill her? Punch her? Yell?

He wasn't sure what his heart would bring him to do, but he knew he had to find her.

…

…

He had gone back to his apartment first, expecting her to have come back from meeting Ai. But, of course, she was nowhere to be found. The door was still locked from the inside, the note was exactly where he had left it, and her scent wasn't in any of the rooms.

She hadn't come back. Did they know they would be looking for her?

An Anbu member had appeared on his balcony and informed him that, though they hadn't found Hotaru just yet, they found Ai sleeping in a motel.

It took them less than six minutes to get there.

Morino Ibiki was standing by the doorway, his arms crossed in front of him. When Kakashi approached, Ibiki gave him an acknowledging grunt, "She says she'll only speak to you,"

Inside, the room was littered with Anbu. Two of them held a woman with fiery red hair on the floor. She was kneeling on the carpet. Blood streaked from the crown of her head, down her neck and breasts, to her stomach. They'd already worked her over.

Ai panted through the blood on her face and looked to Kakashi.

"Where's Hotaru?" He spoke calmly.

She didn't answer. She only looked at him with disdain.

"I'll ask you again. Where's-"

"She's not coming back,"

His eye widened, "She'd leave her comrade?"

His question was returned with silence once again.

"If you won't tell me, then we'll just find her ourselves," He spoke and, just as he turned to walk away, he said, "I can't believe I fell for your lies,"

He started to walk away and tried to hide himself from his embarrassment. He was a well-known, well-seasoned Konoha jounin who shouldn't have fallen for something so stupid. His shame radiated from every pore.

"You don't know a goddamn thing about her!" Ai shrieked as he passed the doorframe, her voice cracked towards the end.

"You're right. I don't,"

"I'll show you every damn thing about her life…" Ai sounded defeated. Her voice was hoarse, "If you just bring her back…"

Kakashi stopped in his tracks, "Why would you _want_ me to capture her?"

When Ai said nothing, he ventured into the room again. Her head was hanging loosely from her neck as she stared at the bloody carpet. He kneeled in front of her and pushed her chin up to look at him.

Tears streaked her cheeks, "She gave me her memories. I'll show you everything,"

Her eyes met his single black as he contemplated this. With silent understanding he jerked his hitai ate up to his forehead, exposing the deadly Sharingan eye.

She didn't waiver when she met his gaze. In fact, she was anxious to have him start. There was so much truth that she had kept bottled inside her and it was time that he knew.

"There's not much time," She murmured.

He got the idea. The Sharingan started to spin violently until both of them were sucked into black.


	10. Memories Part 1

_She didn't waiver when she met his gaze. In fact, she was anxious to have him start. There was so much truth that she had kept bottled inside her and it was time that he knew._

"_There's not much time," She murmured._

_He got the idea. The Sharingan started to spin violently until both of them were sucked into black._

….

….

It felt like he was being squeezed through an old-timey laundry wringer. His body was twisted and contorted through black space. All sense of time and location was dissolved. Kakashi wasn't sure exactly what was going on; he just knew he needed answers. His very existence depended on it.

Suddenly the sick twirling feeling was stopped completely and he looked on at a little girl and what seemed to be her dad. The girl looked only about five or six. She had ultra long hair that extended to her rear that was braided. She was standing next to her father who had dark hair as she did.

He looked on, smiling, "You can't just expect to get it on your first try,"

He chuckled at the clearly frustrated young girl. When she looked up at her father, with her bottom lip jutting out in a pronounced pout, there was no more questioning who she was. Gold eyes shone brightly in the setting sunlight.

"Dear! Hotaru!" A young woman in her mid to late twenties waved to them from the doorway of a house, "Dinner! Don't make me come out there…"

It was clear where Hotaru had received the gene of curves. Her mother had a perfect hourglass shape and lighter brown colored hair. She disappeared into the house where the shadows of a fire danced along the window.

"Papa," Tiny Hotaru squeaked to her father who looked down at her, "I want to practice some more,"

He grinned, teeth flashing, and ruffled her hair, "All in good time, Hotaru-chan,"

She lifted her short arms to the sky and he scooped her up to his body. He held her in a warm embrace and kissed her forehead gently.

As he turned to return to where was dinner was waiting, Kakashi caught a flash of metal. Around her father's right thigh was a hitai-ate tied securely.

Kakashi couldn't believe he was actually a Kusa ninja.

…

…

Kakashi felt himself twisting in blackness again. His stomach churned at the sensation, but the trip didn't last very long.

Before he knew it, he was looking on at a girl practicing her Wind technique, then rushing to her village to find her parents slaughtered. A band or rogue ninja confronted her.

A hideous man with a metal right eye and thick scars that ran down his face and neck grabbed Hotaru by the hair, "I think she's got a bit of fun in her…" He snarled in her face and panic flashed across her innocent face.

Her breathing grew heavy and quick. Her small hands clutched and scratched at his wrists.

He drug her into an alley nearby that was flanked by houses set ablaze. Kakashi could hear the whimperings of the girl. Then they escalated in full on screams. He could hear clothes ripping and the thumps and bangs of a struggle.

Kakashi tried to lurch forward; to rush to her aid and beat the shit out of the fucker who was touching her. But his body, if that's what he was inhabiting at the time, wouldn't budge. His legs refused to move a centimeter, but he didn't quit trying. His breathing grew heavy and sweat was slicked against his brow. His heart grew heavier with each passing second and he would have given up everything if he could have just gone back in time and prevented this. How had things like this happened so close to home?

Kakashi was proud, at least, that she fought. He was even prouder when the man reemerged with fresh blood oozing from his face and arms.

He looked more than displeased, "Take her back," He spat at his men who scrambled to the alley and pulled Hotaru out. She was upset, but didn't look defeated. She looked like she was trying to come up with a plan of escape.

Once again, Kakashi spun through time and space. He still felt queasy, but he was starting to get used to it when he landed inside a building.

It was actually quite nice. The floors were marble in the room he was in and the walls were smooth granite. It wasn't so much a building as a cross between a mansion and a fortress. It would be hard for anyone to get in – or out.

…

…

Hotaru was, again, a few years older than when he had last seen her. Her expression seemed as hard as the floor she was scrubbing on hands and knees. She was dressed in shabby clothes, her hair pinned back in pigtails.

Her eyes were still gold in color, but they didn't shine as brightly as he remembered them. They looked dull with her passing age. The past few years on her had been in turmoil, he could tell.

A wide door was slung open and a thin, moldy looking man tossed a young girl in. The girl looked beyond terrified as she looked to Hotaru, the only other female in the vicinity, for help.

Hotaru just kept scrubbing the floors, not bothering to look up.

The burly, scarred man strode in, a look of satisfaction draped on his deformed face. The instantly went to the girl who, not surprisingly, had scorching red hair. He had the same look of malicious intent as he did that day he came across Hotaru and Kakashi thought he would be sick all over again.

The man grabbed Ai by her arms and pinned her to the freshly cleaned floor. Kakashi couldn't believe that Hotaru would pay so little attention. He really hadn't known her at all, had he?

Questions started to pop into Kakashi's head. Why would Ai continue to be such a loyal friend to Hotaru even when this had happened? How had such a tragic past befallen the both of them?

Ai started to sob uncontrollably under the man as he kissed and licked at her neck. Panic was setting in as she tried to thrash about, though his huge body prevented much movement.

"Baal-sama…" Hotaru murmured just a few feet away from them, her worn child's hands still clutching a sponge that dragged along the floor.

He stopped what he was doing, apparently thrilled at the attention he received from her. Hotaru stopped scrubbing and sat back on her legs, "Can I have this one?" She asked so innocently, like a child speaking to her father. But her bright eyes didn't meet his and, instead, looked to floor like she was examining her handiwork, "I could use an assistant,"

His eyes narrowed at her, unsure of whether she was serious or if he should question her intentions, "Alright," He finally announced and pulled back from the girl before he damaged her any more, "Just this one. But she better be damn useful, I swear to god,"

He stood up and, amazingly, ignored Ai who still lay on the floor shocked at this turn of events. He only had eyes for Hotaru who continued to stare at the ground in front of her, "Thank you, Baal-sama,"

He nodded briefly and stormed out the door from which he had come, pushing into his two stooges that stood guard. He seemed furious.

Kakashi turned his attention back to the girls who were still as they had been before. Ai lay on the sparkling marble floor, her eyes wide and tears still streaking down her face. Hotaru quietly went back to scrubbing.

"T-thank you," Ai spoke in an immature, high-pitched voice.

Hotaru replied in an eerily ominous voice, "Don't thank me yet,"

…

…

Another round of black. Another trip of movement. A little less sickness.

Kakashi looked on as Hotaru and Ai stood side by side in a kitchen. One washed grimy dishes while the other dried and put them away.

Ai kept stealing glances at her savior, but Hotaru continued to ignore her like she did everything else. Maybe this was the time she had given up. Her steeled perseverance seemed to be broken.

"H-how do we get out… of here?" Ai dared to venture.

She was responded with only the sound of dishes clinking together and the slopping of water.

"I said-"

"You don't. You just survive,"

Ai's eyes grew wide as the dinner plate she was grasping. She looked on the verge of tears again.

"They're a lot stronger than you think," Hotaru finally stopped her work and looked straight on at Ai, "Just stay away from him, okay? He won't be nice…" A flash of despair shone through her eyes at her own words. A hidden trauma lurked within her, "When you _do_ see him, say his name. He likes when the girls say Baal-sama. Don't make eye contact with anyone else. Just do your work. Got it?"

Ai's head bobbed in a quick nod.

Hotaru dried her hands on a towel and went to the other side of the room. She stopped in front of a shiny wooden cabinet near the floor, opened it, and crouched. Her arms reached back and when that was far enough, she pushed half of her torso inside. Kakashi could hear her rummage through pots and pans. Then she reemerged holding a small package wrapped in a fresh green leaf.

She offered Ai the bundle, "Here, eat this. They don't give you much so I take when I can,"

Ai unfolded the leaf to find a moldy piece of bread. She ate it with fervor in one bite.

"The leaf, too," Hotaru told her and she obeyed.

They returned to their washing duties, Hotaru a little less stiff with Ai now, "There's one way…" She told Ai, "If you become one of them, they let you out,"

"One of them?"

"It's hard. Very hard," Hotaru frowned, "You only get one chance to try. You have to challenge one of them and if you win, you get in,"

Ai looked worried once again, "And… if not…?" She gulped.

"It's a fight to the death, so if you don't kill _him_, he kills _you_," Hotaru contemplated this for a moment then said, "Don't worry. My Papa taught me how to use Wind so I just need to train. And if I can just get past the beating-"

"_Beating_?"

"Before you can even challenge, they torture you," She looked to Ai, "In case you're on a mission and get caught, they want to make sure you won't crack," Hotaru told her as a matter of factly.

Ai dropped a plate. She looked like she about to break down in tears. Hotaru scrambled to scrape up the jagged pieces from the floor, "Idiot, they'll hear you," She hissed as she his pieces in towels and stuffed them to the bottom of the garbage, "What's wrong with you?"

Ai's lib trembled, "I can't use ninjutsu…" She whispered, her voice cracking.

Hotaru cast her eyes down. It was obvious that she would be used in 'other' ways if she wasn't useful to the team Hotaru referred to.

"I'll take care of you," Hotaru announced, confident, "I'll take the test, pass, and then I'll tell him I need you to be my assistant. You don't need to do anything if you're just my assistant,"

With that, Hotaru went back to her dishes and they continued their work in silence.

This time Kakashi stood in a courtyard. It must've been a space that visitors never saw because it didn't match the rest of the house. The weeds dominated every crack in the stone, vines drooped from the cracked and broken columns on each corner, piles of rubble rested in random spots scattered across the area.

…

…

Hotaru looked around fifteen or so when he saw her standing in the middle of the courtyard destruction. A slick sheen of sweat beaded across her face as she continued to form signs in frustration. Every few seconds a gush of wind would spin in the courtyard and then disappear without having done anything useful to her.

She'd sigh in annoyance.

"Come on…" She weaved signs again.

"Ouch!" She squealed to herself and looked down at her hands. The palms bled profusely, the red trickling down to her elbows. A light lit up in her eyes and she dashed right by Kakashi to the house.

He inhaled as she ran. She smelled like jasmine flowers, just as she did when he had been with her. The breeze from her body was chilly against his skin. His arms prickled at the closeness of her. In that moment, he couldn't control the urge to grab her and hold her younger body tight. He didn't have a clue what he would say, he only wanted to hold her and never let her out of his embrace.

He was inside now. Ai was sleeping on her torn bed when Hotaru burst into the room with glee. She pushed Ai's body with her bloody hands and, when Ai awoke, she displayed her blood soaked arms like a prize.

"Look! Look!"

"What the hell? What happened…" Ai sat straight up, concerned for her friend.

"I couldn't get it to work right, but I figured something else out. This will help me win!" She bounced around the room with joy, unable to contain her happiness.

Kakashi thought idly to himself that teenage girls shouldn't be so joyous about such things.

…

…

He was taken to the day of her initiation. Hotaru sat on a wooden stool in their room, a steeled look on her face. Ai paced nervously on the floor in front of her.

Another henchman, a bandana wrapped around his grimy head, opened the door and Hotaru stood to follow him. Ai grabbed onto her arm.

"It's fine," She whispered. "I'll be okay. Just… be here when I get back," Hotaru flashed a smile that was meant to sedate Ai's worry, but did little to help.

She was gone most of the night. How Kakashi knew this, he had absolutely no idea. Truthfully, he wasn't sure how this memory thing was working to start with. Of course it had something to do with his borrowed Sharingan, but that was the extent of his knowledge.

Steady footsteps could be heard, what sounded like ascending stairs. They reached the door where Ai sat nervously waiting.

The same skinny man from before appeared in the doorway and headed straight for the bed. He held a grim expression on his face, like that of guilt. Kakashi could see why.

Hotaru was limp in his arms; her body was covered in bruises and blood. She was breathing very faintly. Now white lips were dry and cracking. Blood seeped from her mouth, down her lips to her chin.

He set her down gently on the bed and pulled a thin blanket over her still body. She winced when her body hit the bed, but eased back, filled with pride.

"Take care of 'er. She's got three broken ribs," He spoke to Ai before turning to Hotaru, "Ya did good, kid," then he disappeared from the room.

Ai rushed to Hotaru's side and kneeled on the floor beside her. Golden eyes shone brightly again. A faint smile curved along her lips, "I did it," She croaked, "They'll let me move on to the challenge,"

Ai grabbed her hand to hold on to and, when Hotaru flinched, she released it. When she looked at the palm, her stomach churned. In Hotaru's left hand, a crest hand been seared into the flesh. A snake with wings wrapped itself around a sword. The skin was red and puckered.

Ai wanted to scold Hotaru for taking such a risk with her life, but when she looked up, she saw that the other girl was fast asleep.

…

…

A dirt area was wide open for Kakashi to look upon. Hotaru stood across from her opponent.

He could only make out bits of the fight. He supposed, in the blur of things, Hotaru's memory couldn't keep up with it all. Her opponent was, thankfully, not as large as the Boss, but much, much bigger than the girl. But she faced with unwavering confidence. It could only be expected of someone, though. The survival instinct is the strongest in humans. It was literally kill or be killed and she had no intention of suffering the latter.

She was decent at Tai jutsu, though it was obvious she needed more practice. There was only so much one person could do alone in a courtyard. Her ninjutsu was definitely stronger. At one point she used her new technique, the one used to pop open locks of doors recently, to punch a wide hole through the man's thigh muscle. It went clean through his leg, enough to see the other side. The collapsed in pain, but refused to give up his own life.

Then, surprisingly for a fifteen year old orphan girl, she pulled a metal pole from the stands and stood in front of her opponent. In one swift move she stabbed the jagged metal end through his chest cavity, right where his heart beat, and flipped him clean over her head to land on his back on her opposite side.

That was the end. She was declared the winner, to the roar of the approving crowd and was sent to her own room, Ai designated as her apprentice.

…

…

Time was surged forward at the blink of an eye. It was, perhaps, six years in the future. Hotaru looked much older, but still youthful. Her body had grown into a woman's. The curves of her breasts and hips smoothed out by a slinky bandage dress.

They were in what looked like a club. It was filled to the brim with hoards of men gathered around card tables, waiting for the half naked woman before then to deal the cards and their gambling fates. The walls were lined with booths that held long curtains for privacy. Every so often there would be a break to allow for a bar. Every employee was female and barely dressed. Music blasted from speakers scattered strategically around the giant room. Kakashi noticed they weren't near the closeted booths, probably to allow for shady business inside.

Hotaru strode across the room with total confidence. Ai walked behind her as they weaved through tables. They ignored the filthy looks of the men and, instead, focused on a certain table a few yards from them.

Kakashi was taken aback when Hotaru grabbed one of the guys by the collar and flung him to the floor. Beer and cards went flying. Some stuck to his flesh.

Instead of retaliating, he looked afraid, like she was going to slash his thick set throat at any second.

"You dumbass," She shouted above the music, "You almost got the entire fucking company exposed,"

He stuttered something Kakashi couldn't discern before her high heeled boot collided with his jaw. She reached down and grasped his shirt again and pulled his torso from the ground.

She hissed in his ear a warning, "You better get out of here before I call the Boss,"

He wasted no time and stumbled as quickly as he could out of the place, vanishing into the night outside.

It was surprising how she had had so many changes. Hotaru was once a stubborn little girl, intent on learning her father's ninjutsu. Then she had become a bitter and scared kid. Now she was a full on terrifying woman who, apparently, was in charge of a lot of people.

The bass bumped low. Kakashi could feel the deep vibrations in his feet that crept up to his stomach.

Hotaru made a few rounds in the club, collecting money, giving mission orders (some that included kidnapping and looting). Kakashi scoped out the place. He couldn't recognize any of his surroundings. He was hoping that if he could get a bead on where he was at, when he came to back at the village, they could see if it still existed. But his feet stayed glued to the spot he was in so he hoped he would get a lead somehow.

As he looked about, he recognized some of the criminals. Some of them had been in the bingo book for decades. They'd never been caught, but here they were, right before his eyes. This place was dripping with crime and he winced at the fact that Hotaru had been a part in organizing it all.

Hotaru did nothing special for quite some time. She just walked rounds, her head turning from side to side like a hawk scoping out its own territory. Men continued to gamble, some turning into violent fights which Hotaru quickly took care of. Some men took to secret meetings in one of the booths…

Something caught Kakashi's eye.

A Konoha jounin vest flashed in a corner. Dark, unruly hair marked with a hitai ate leaned against the wall. Round, brown eyes gazed from the shadows. The tip of a crooked cigarette glowed against the darkness.

What in the fuck was Asuma doing in a place like that?

Before he could get too good of a look, the memory ended with Hotaru exiting the building.

…

…

Sarutobi Asuma walked along the alleyways in the city. It was unclear where they were exactly. Everything looked average – average buildings, average street, average people. No one wore a hitai ate. No one wore the garb of a ninja. This may not be a ninja village.

Kakashi smelled the jasmine before he actually saw her. Hotaru stood behind Asuma, a sharp hunter's knife gleaming against the stubble on his neck. He froze, his hands reaching to the air in surrender.

"You've been following me," She told him, though it was obvious as to the answer, "Why?"

"You're third in command, right?"

Her eyes narrowed at this information.

Kakashi stood nearby, shocked at this revelation. He'd figured she was pretty high up, but to only be one rank away from that bastard was absurd. Why would she climb so high on the ladder? Where was the honor and pride she'd felt all those years ago?

"What of it?"

"I need to talk with you in private,"

Hotaru held the knife to his throat, though he showed no signs of malcontent, "You wanna talk to me, you can go to the club like everyone else,"

"This is different," He replied in an ominous tone.

Then the memory ended just a suddenly as it had appeared.

…

…

**I know I left this in an odd kin of place, but I wanted to split this up into two parts so it doesn't become a novella in itself. So please bear with me, the next **chapter** will be up soon. =)**


	11. Memories Part 2

**I apologize, once again, for the extreme delay. It drives me crazy when it takes people over a couple of weeks to update, but I've had a ton going on. I hope you enjoy!**

…..

…..

In present day, the night still hung over Konoha like a heavy curtain. The strong scent of rain was building from the north and it was perfect timing. Behind her, Hotaru could hear the soft _whoosh_ of ninja feet following her. She was fast, but eventually she'd have to take action. She couldn't afford to lose this mission.

Thick tree branches zoomed by her head as she darted through the forest. The strong odor of dirt and leaves sent a calmness through her body. It took her back to the times when her father would carry her out to the field behind their house. It was encircled with a dense forest, in the center a flat, green meadow. He'd taught her not to give up.

Gradually, her feet slowed, allowing the Anbu to near her. From the sounds of their feet, she could tell they had only sent two after her. They must have thought she wasn't too much of a threat. She was only escaping and they needed to know why.

Thankfully, this worked out to her advantage.

Hotaru had enough skill to take on a couple Anbu Black Ops, but if they had sent more, she would've had to be craftier. There's only so much one person could do. That way of thinking kept her alive all this time.

She darted straight up, close to the top of a tree and waited for them to run under her. Of course, they realized she was there, but it was too late. She jumped down on them and shot a high kick at one of the Anbu's head. He fell to the ground below. That left the one still standing on the branch, ready to take her on.

The Anbu sent a series of kicks and punches her way, of which Hotaru dodged and blocked. It wasn't that she did this with ease. He was fast and she'd never had formal ninjutsu training so it was a tough match.

The Anbu sent a smoldering stream of fire towards her. She darted to the branch next to her, leaving the previous tree to smoke. Hotaru sent a gust of wind shaped like blades towards him. He was scratched in a few places, but had carefully evaded.

When she looked down at the ground, she saw the other Anbu ninja stir. She needed to end this quickly otherwise she'd be overpowered and be dragged back to Konoha by her feet.

Balling her fist tight, Hotaru sprinted straight for the Anbu in the tree. He dodged her punch and chuckled from below at her failed plan. But a punch to the face wasn't her plan at all. The tree cracked in half and creaked towards him at a frightening pace. He jumped to the ground and to the side of the falling tree just in time for Hotaru to jam her palm against his stomach.

She couldn't see his shocked face nor see the blood spattered on his lips, but she could hear his moan and feel his trembling.

At the last second, she had formed her chakra into a long thin blade. It now sat imbedded in his torso. He stumbled back and fell to the dirt and leaves on the ground. Without hesitating, Hotaru strutted to him and kicked his head, rendering him unconscious.

But the fun wasn't over, she realized as she heard the other Anbu approach her at a quickening speed. She turned, using her forearm to shield herself, but to no avail. The Anbu's kunai had been stabbed into her right arm.

She winced and hissed from the pain, but she couldn't let it slow her. She sent a series of round kicks to his upper body and head. She thought they had been useless until she felt the impact on the last kick. He stumbled back long enough for her to approach. She thought she would try the same technique she had on the previous ninja, but this one wasn't falling for it.

When Hotaru had neared to his arm's reach, he grabbed her, jammed his thumb into her arm wound and shoved her against the wide trunk of a tree. Her eyes squeezed shut with this fresh agony she was feeling, but flashed open when she felt his hand grasped her face.

He forced her eyes open with the pressure from his hands. His fingers squeezed into her cheeks with fire. Her bright golden eyes met shadowed when she realized.

"Genjutsu doesn't work on me, you son of a bitch," And she followed through with a counter to his hold, pressing him against the very same tree where she had been milliseconds before. Before he could realize what had happened, she punched him square in the jaw then pressed her palm to his stomach just as she had the other one.

The Anbu slumped to the ground, his back resting against trunk and twisted roots. She then slammed a front stomp to his forehead and his head followed suit of his body.

Hotaru took a moment to assess her surroundings. The Anbu would be fine once they woke up. She hadn't hit any vital organs which would guarantee them survival; it would just hurt like a bitch later. She only had about twenty minutes until they woke up; probably less until more Konoha nin were sent after her. Confident that she heard no signs of being tracked, Hotaru sprinted to the treetops again and made her way back to the place she called home.

…

…

Kakashi looked on at Asuma and Hotaru crowded in a tiny hut like home somewhere in the middle of the country. They looked awkward and suspicious of each other. They didn't speak to one another and every so often would steal suspicious glances at one another.

Thankfully all of this was interrupted.

Tsunade burst in through the front door in an annoyed mood as she usually was. Asuma scrambled to straighten up more for his Hokage. Hotaru stayed in her slouched position.

"I'm going to cut to the chase," Tsunade spoke to Hotaru as she placed her hands on the table, "You're pretty significant in the criminal world and I think you can help us,"

Hotaru's eyebrows creased, "Help you? Help _you_? Why would I do that? I'm surprised you haven't tried to reprimand me yet,"

"Well, we would. But I've learned a little about your history and-"

"You don't know one _fucking_ about my history, lady,"

Tsunade leaned back, straightening her back, her breasts extending that much more. She took a deep breath, "You're right," She offered.

Hotaru didn't seem sold, but after a minute of silence, she couldn't help her curiosity, "So… what do you want?"

Tsunade offered a faint smile, "I want the Akatsuki,"

The only sound was the cheerful songs of crickets outside and the crackle of the fire in the room. Gold eyes grew wide as the moon at the sound of the organization, "I-" She started, unsure of what to say, "I don't have much leeway with that," When nothing was said by Tsunade nor Asuma, she added, "What's in it for me?"

"Freedom,"

"Sure, sure," Hotaru offered sarcastically.

"Your criminal record will be wiped. You'll have a sweet little house in Konoha, you'll get a sweet little normal job and you'll have a sweet little life. New identity. New past. New life," Tsunade leaned close to Hotaru, "Give us the Akatsuki and you can be a citizen for the rest of your life,"

She wasn't thinking clearly. Her breathing was growing heavier by the second. Her mind was racing. This could be the chance she was looking for. A new life for herself.

"You can't just walk away from this place," She told the Hokage, "You're in it for life,"

The blonde nodded, "Once we get what we need, we'll wipe out the organization you're involved in,"

Hotaru nodded absent mindedly, "What about Ai?"

"Bring her,"

"How can I trust you? How can you trust me?"

Tsunade looked her straight in the eye, "You have my, no… you have The Leaf's word. As for you? Well… that's up to you if you want to carry this out or start a war. It's all your call,"

Hotaru weighed her options carefully, though it took her no time at all.

Betray the organization that was responsible for tearing your life apart for the slight chance of a happy normal life in the Leaf Village? Or stay?

It wasn't hard, "Alright. But under my conditions," When Asuma tensed she added, "They're pretty tricky people so _you_," She pointed to him, "Need to come by the club pretty regularly. If they get wind that we're meeting and keeping it secret, it'll send off about a million red flags. We'll meet at different safe houses that I'll send to you ahead of time by messenger bird. I'll have to stay there a night or two since I'll fake going on recon and intel missions,"

Tsunade looked to Asuma for his approval. He gave it.

Hotaru blew out a sigh, "What the hell am I doing?" She mumbled to herself.

…

…

Kakashi was twisted in a black tunnel again. Graciously, his stomach had decided that it was tired of giving him grief and had stopped churning.

It appeared that Hotaru and Asuma were in one of the safe houses she had mentioned before. Ai lay asleep, and snoring, on a cramped bed in the corner. The two conscious ninja sat outside on the front steps overlooking a dark forest of trees. It was pitch black outside and hardly any lights were inside. Kakashi assumed if you were hiding for your life, you wouldn't have too many flames burning.

The two sat in awkward silence again, only crickets chirping to break the stagnant air.

"Hey, Asuma…"

He turned his head towards her, but she stared at her feet. The air of her voice and her body language reminded Kakashi of a child, too embarrassed to ask for help. She clutched her legs and rested her chin on her knees.

"Will you tell me about the village?"

Even in the darkness and past his thick facial hair, his smile was prominent and warm. It was apparent that, even though they still had silences, they had grown more fond of each other.

Asuma told her about the streets and the river. He told her about all of the shops he could think of and the kinds of people that worked in them. He told her about the way the seasons changed so perfectly that you could set your watch to them.

"Do you have anyone… back home?" She questioned.

Asuma stuttered momentarily, caught off guard by her intrusion, "Uh… umm… well," His face softened at the thought of Kurenai. He could almost feel her touch on his neck; her kisses on hips lips.

"We're not exactly a… _thing_," He explained, "We just see each other every once and awhile,"

Hotaru nodded, "You should change that," She spoke boldly. Asuma started to question her authority when she spoke again, "Do you love her?" Golden orbs focused plainly on his eyes. They didn't waiver. She wasn't afraid.

"You should tell her how you feel. There's no point in waiting. Especially in your line of duty… you could die first,"

A tense silence hung between them – each measured each other's ability.

Then he laughed a loud, bellowing laugh.

"Shh! You're gonna wake Ai!" Hotaru hissed, but her mouth gave way to a chuckle as well.

The two sat back in their seats, content with the stillness of the air and the game they played. It was nice, albeit strange, to not worry about the next kill or interrogation; to not worry about whose side everyone was on. They just played a steady game of Go. No words required.

"Checkmate," Ai whispered smugly.

…

…

Hotaru was back at the club. The place was dimly lit and smelled strongly of cigar smoke. It was filled to the brim with sleazy looking people. The scratched off symbols of loyalty adorned about half of the male foreheads in the giant room.

Half naked women danced around men and on poles.

She sat in an oversized, curtained booth directly next to the boss Baal. She looked like something was gnawing at her feet and there was an annoying itch. It was obvious her skin was crawling sitting next to him.

Kakashi's curiosity was only pushed over the edge when two Akatsuki ninja sit in the seat across from them. He couldn't keep his jaw from dropping when he recognized a halved Rain and Mist village symbols.

Pein and Kisame sat across from them.

Hotaru kept her composure fairly well for knowing who sat with her. She stared mostly at the scuffed wooden table in front of her and took momentary glances at the rogue nin in front of her.

"Of course! Of course! Anything for my comrades," Baal bellowed in the small space, "I'll send Hotaru, here, with you, Kisame. She should be more than _adequate_," He winked. Kisame smirked at his perverted innuendo.

Pein nodded in agreeance. Meanwhile, Hotaru was frozen with fear.

After the two had left, she argued with Baal. It was difficult to make out for Kakashi. He wasn't sure why. Many things can alter a memory, he thought, and maybe she had just tried to forget that she would be sent on a confidential mission with a member of the Akatsuki. After all, she was trying to escape.

"I can't go. This is bullshit!" She yelled at the torn man.

He towered over her, "I don't give a fuck what you think. I _own_ you. Have more confidence,"

"I have plenty confidence, you shit," She sighed out of frustration, "I just knows he doesn't have a reputation for nothing. He could probably rip me apart without breaking sweat,"

He plopped a heavy, scarred hand onto her shoulder. She flinched at the contact, but refused to look at him, her jaw clenched tightly.

"Then don't piss him off,"

…

…...

"She's changed, Asuma. I don't know what's going on, but she's more sullen than usual," Ai spoke in a gloomy voice as she continuously stirred a giant pot on the stove. The strong scent of beef broth, vegetables, and spices wafted around the small room. She and Asuma were, once again, hidden like roaches in a tiny home somewhere in the country. That was probably best. Who would go searching randomly in the countryside for traitors?

"How long will she be?" Asuma asked as he checked a small, dingy clock hung on the wall. He must've questioned how Hotaru had come across these safes houses as Kakashi had been since these memories had begun. To ensure that no one walked in on them while they were there, she had to have ownership of the property somehow. This was a staggering feat since she proposed a completely different place each time they met. And, Kakashi concluded from the way every acted toward each other, they must've met fairly often.

"I told you, I honestly don't know," Ai answered with a sigh as if she been asked the same question a hundred times, "She went with Kisame and said she had to report back to Baal-sama before coming here," She cut a hard look at Asuma, never faltering her steady hand, "She can't just flit around doing whatever. She has people she has to answer to, you know,"

"Whoa," He held his palms up as if in surrender, "I'm not your enemy here," He smiled.

Ai shook her red hair and it danced around her bare shoulders merrily, "Sorry, sorry. I'm just… on edge,"

They decided to eat as soon as Ai was done cooking. They didn't have even an estimated time that Hotaru would arrive and both of theirs stomachs growled angrily. Dinner was hazy for Kakashi. It was short and foggy… maybe because it wasn't too important to the story Ai was telling him.

In the middle of clearing the dishes from the table, Asuma stopped cold. His eyes shot Ai's and they stood there, gazing. In that brief moment, though they spoke no words, a million things were communicated.

They both bee lined for the door, but before either could reach it, it swung open.

With the black of night framing her hourglass shaped frame, Hotaru leaned against the doorframe wearily. Her right hand clutched at her left shoulder. Both were dripping with darkening blood. She swallowed hard through the evident pain and stumbled into the room.

Asuma rushed forward to catch her just before she lost consciousness and, when the memory came back, Kakashi was standing in the corner of a cramped room.

Hotaru lay in the tiny bed while Asuma and Ai kneeled by one side. The brunette was awake now, although wincing from contact with Asuma's fingertips.

"How the hell did this happen?" He questioned while Ai handed him a needle and thread.

"Mm… Let me keep this short: ship, falling mast, chase, swords, and a shit ton of rain," She groaned.

He shook his head disapprovingly, "We need to clean this and close it up,"

Hotaru leaned up with his assistance and Ai stripped her shirt from her back. Kakashi wanted to vomit all over again. Around the base of Hotaru's neck was a thick bruise in the shape of a hand. Dark purple bruising and knots popped against the subtle lines of her ribcage. When he heard a squeak from below him, Kakashi looked down to find his fists clenched.

Asuma clearly had a similar reaction. The evidence was his dangerously clenched jaw and fists.

Hotaru looked to him, "Can we please just buck up and do this? I hate needles," She told him nonchalantly as she leaned against the wall for support.

Asuma was fast, but his skill was something to be improved. It did the job, though and he and Ai headed out. Just as Ai had passed the door, Hotaru snatched Asuma's wrist.

She looked at him with desperation, "They're planning something big, Asuma,"

His interest was peaked, "Like what?"

She shook her head, "I don't know. The Akatsuki are very secretive. But I _do_ know they're planning something. Something huge," Her golden eyes latched onto his, "I'm talking about crazy, take over the world kind of stuff. Be careful, okay?"

Then darkness.

…

…

The sweet scent of rain enveloped Kakashi's being as the light cleared way to another memory. The chaos of drops slamming against metal roofing overpowered his hearing as did the occasional bang of thunder. He'd stepped directly into the middle of a fight between Hotaru and Asuma. It was difficult to make out the words they shouted at one another of the commotion of Mother Nature roaring outside. But it slowly came to him.

"It's been over a fucking year!" Hotaru screamed, irritation seeping from every pore, "When is this gonna end?"

"We don't have enough information," Asuma bellowed, not quite as loud as she had.

"Screw that. Screw _that_! I can't just make shit up for you Leaf people. They only tell me what they tell me,"

"I realize that. Just keep going a little longer,"

"You've been saying that for months, Asuma! Talk to your Hokage. Get her to understand,"

"We don't have enough information," He repeated, "We can't do anything to Akatsuki right now,"

"It's not _your_ goddamn life on the line! Or any of your's!" She flailed for emphasis, "It's _mine_! And _her's_!" She pointed to Ai who sat silent in a chair, unsure of what to do.

"I can't do anything!"

Hotaru stomped to the door where she removed her coat from the hook on the wall, "Let's go, Ai," She spoke quietly before turning to Asuma, "Go to hell. I thought you were better than this,"

When the door slammed shut and Asuma was all alone, he took a long drag of his cigarette and ran his hand through his hair. The glow of the tip was brilliant against the shadows, Kakashi thought. If only he could see him again…

…

…

"Well, just chop his head off," The scarred monster sneered at an underling stooping before him, "Why are you bothering me with this shit?"

They spoke nothing more and the underling scrambled off. When Kakashi looked beside him, he realized Hotaru was sitting right next to him. It was hard no to get caught off guard by the appearance of her soft skin. He could remember how he had it flush in his bed. Her lips were full and dry. He remembered how he'd soaked them with his own. Her hair fell in soft waves around her shoulders and some draped between her breasts. He remembered how he'd run his fingers through the soft strands.

But he needed to stop remembering and pay attention.

Baal looked up and stared straight at Hotaru without any shame. His fat, dirty lips curved into a malicious grin, "By the way, Hotaru,"

She looked to him with disgust plain across her features.

"That Leaf friend who kept stopping by… you were doing work for him, correct?"

She nodded.

"He's dead. You don't need to do work for him anymore,"

It was possible that it wasn't evident to the rest of the room – in truth, it only lasted a fraction of second and, by that time, no one was paying attention to her – but Kakashi could plainly see. Hotaru sucked in a shocked gasp of air and a horrible pain covered her face. Her eyes lost light, if only for a second, and she looked like she would break down into a fit of sobs.

Then she resumed her composure and went about her nonchalant and bossy demeanor.

Kakashi relived the news all over again. His heart felt like the scarred man had seized it in his fist and was squeezing the life from it. How many friends and loved ones would die before the world was satisfied?

…

…

Hotaru was wreaking havoc on what seemed to be a giant apartment. She slammed vases against the wall and the shattered into a wet mess on the carpet. She upturned the coffee table and raked papers and lamps off of a desk.

All before she collapsed against the wall, covering her face.

There was the breakdown she'd worked so hard to hold in.

…..

…..

It was a different day; a different hour.

Someone knocked on her front door politely. The mess from the previous memory had long since been cleaned up and Kakashi watched as Hotaru padded across her living room, barefoot and in pajamas.

She rubbed her eyes before opening the door. It was strange, Kakashi thought to himself. She must have an apartment _in_ their organization's headquarters. Her door opened to an elaborately decorated hallway. It looked just like some of the hallways he had seen before.

"What do you want?" Hotaru asked with a wide yawn.

The man on the other side remained stiff, "Baal-sama wants you in his office," And, without saying anything more he disappeared down the fancy hall.

She closed the door; all signs of weariness had vanished. She was nervous.

…..

…..

"I've got a job for you," He announced to a room that consisted of only him and Hotaru. She was now dressed and ready for combat, "I'm sending you to Konoha. Make up whatever character you like," _A ninja from Kusa looking to speak with the Hokage about financial aid_, "I need you to find someone; interrogate him,"

"Interrogate him?"

"Mhm," He pursed his lips and clasped his hands together to lean forward in his chair. Hotaru stiffened in defense, "You don't need many details. Take Ai if you need to,"

He waited. She said nothing.

"You don't want to know who you're after?" He smiled with an evil delight.

She parted her lips to reveal gritted teeth and said, in a sarcastically interested tone, "Who?"

"Hatake Kakashi,"

Her eyes grew, "The Copy Nin? Are you serious?"

His irritation exploded, "Don't question me like that. Just do the fucking job,"

"You _want_ me to get killed don't you? You can't get anymore use out of me so you're sending me off to get rid of myself,"

Baal shot out of his chair and had Hotaru's throat wrapped up in his thick hand before anyone could blink, "Oh, I still have _much_ use out of you,"

She gurgled, trying to gasp for air. He'd lifted her off of the floor. Her feet were dangling inches above the ground. Out of reflex Kakashi surged forward, but realized, again, that he was immobilized. And, of course, this was all in the past.

Baal dropped her. She almost lost her footing as her body descended back to the earth. She choked for air.

"You have the most appetizing body," He turned to her with a fire in his eyes, "Use it,"


	12. Hauntings

Hatake Kakashi was slammed back into his body with lightening speed. He hadn't realized how light his body had become until the weight of returning had turned into an obvious burden. A single black eye gazed down at his fingertips, which he flexed just for the feel of it. He ran his tongue across the smooth surface of his teeth and swallowed. It was surreal.

He had a hard time deciphering reality from dream world – just like when he had returned from Itachi's Tsukuyomi. Of course, there was much less pain and recovery involved this time around.

Kakashi looked up in time to see Ai to tilt to the side and hurl. It was evidently more strenuous on her. He gave her space and even unbound her wrists in the mean time. They had a lot to discuss.

When she was finished, Ai peered up at Kakashi with a fiery will. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.

"So…?"

"So… what?" Kakashi retorted with an air of whimsy, "Who knew I could get motion sick?"

She seemed to not know how to reply. Her eyes were narrowed into slits; suspicious of his words and lack of action. But before she could try her question again, he replied.

"How did you end up there? In that place?"

Ai downcast her eyes, "My parents sold me. It was a hard time. Apparently they needed the money more than they needed me,"

He showed no signs of interest, "Did you learn anymore about the rendezvous with Kisame?"

"No, she doesn't like to talk about it. I think it scared the shit out of her,"

"Where is she going now?"

Evidently this struck something in Ai that awakened her sense of urgency. She sat up on her heels and leaned forward to him, "There's one way out. Kakashi, you have to let me go. We can save her. We can…. We can…" Ai lost control of her breathing as heavy tears came in sobs.

"Just tell me," He spoke; clear, authoritive, strong.

"She… you can challenge them. If you win," Sopping wet eyes looked to Kakashi, practically begging, "If you win, you're free. If you win, you're forgiven for leaving,"

"And if you lose…?"

"You're dead. It's a fight to the death, Kakashi. There's only one way out. And you can only fight for one person," She pressed her lips together hard, "Kakashi, please listen to me. The way she talked… the way… I think she's… god, I think she's going to challenge them for my sake. That way when… _if_ she dies, then she fought for my freedom and I'm saved,"

Kakashi straightened his back, "Why would you think this?"

"She said I should live a good life right before she took off,"

He seemed to consider the possibilities thoroughly. It felt like hours before he finally said anything, a gleam of despair crossing his masked face; a gleam of the past he couldn't escape.

Was he cursed?

"Where?" Broke the stiffening silence.

"I'll be able to recognize it but… well, you know, I don't have chakra. We need someone who can sense chakra,"

He nodded briefly as he tugged her to her feet, "Stay here," And he disappeared in a burst of smoke.

Ai stood awkwardly in the dark room, two ninjas guarding each side of the doorway. Every minute or so they would peek back at her and, upon realizing that she was watching them as well, would snap back to attention. It was an exhausting game of cat and mouse with their eyes. Too bad, she thought, that the circumstances weren't more casual and less life-or-death.

Kakashi reappeared just as oddly as he had gone, "The Hokage knows we're leaving. And it'd be a big help if you'd stay close. I don't feel like chasing down two opinionated women today," And he perked up a smile (she assumed) and an eye crease.

"You're chipper," Ai mumbled, stepping out of the doorway past the guards.

"Helps to put on a happy face,"

He weaved a sign that she couldn't distinguish and out appeared a small herd of dog nin. Ai raised her eyebrows to him, "Sure like that smoke trick, don't you?"

He ignored her, "Which direction?" She pointed and the dogs were off.

He leaned back on his legs just before sprinting and Ai caught his wrist. Her look held a seriousness that he'd never seen before; a fear that couldn't be described. The last place he'd seen that look was when he'd been dispatched for war.

"Kakashi, I know you're great and all. I know you're really skilled and everyone shits their pants when they hear you're name. But… be careful. Some of them are really skilled, but they can rely on numbers if nothing else. I… kind of think you're… okay. So don't die, alright?"

She shot him a sideways smile before sprinting out in front of him. It would be a long run before they would reach their destination.

…

…

The trees whizzed by Hotaru's ears as she flashed through the forest. The sooner she reached the hideout, the sooner she could be done with this bullshit. She shook her head to rid her head of these thoughts.

_Eye on the prize,_ she thought to herself, _Don't compromise the mission._

She sensed dense chakra a few yards in front of her and, when she saw a flash of color amongst the brown and green, she dropped to the ground like a log. Hunching behind shrubbery, Hotaru inched closer, trying to search the chakra to get a better idea of who was there. It was definitely strong. It made the hairs on her neck stand up and a fire flush across her skin. A sweat broke out on her brow, but she stayed on course. She was determined.

Hotaru determined the path that the unknown person was walking and stood, waiting for them, in a clearing. Bright, crisp moonlight poured down on her and soaked her hair. A kunai stood ready in one hand; a chakra blade in the other. The person stepped through the brush.

She darted forward, taking the enemy by surprise and wrapping the kunai across their throat, "Who are you?" She spoke clearly into the person's ear.

They wriggled in her grasp, "Wha-?"

Hotaru pushed him away from her and retracted her chakra blade, "Naruto?"

The blonde kid stood in front of her, confused as hell. His orange clothing looked like a target in the night's light, "Hotaru? What are you doing here?" He seemed joyful to see her, but she didn't trust him quite yet. It was possible that he'd been sent to track her down. She knew he had crazy power inside him.

"I could ask the same," She cocked her head to the side.

"Oh, well, you see," He scratched his head in a sheepish manner, "Tenten told me there was a great training place out here but I don't think there is at all," He puckered his lips, "I think she lied to me, that dirty-"

"Get to the point, Naruto,"

"Oh, right. Well, I got lost on my way back. It's so damn dark in the trees so I figured I'd take my time,"

Hotaru searched him for any signs of untruth, but found nothing. Hell, the kid probably couldn't lie if he wanted to – bad for a ninja; good for her.

"Okay, well, I had to head out for some business so I'll see you around. Village's that way," She pointed directly behind her then pushed past him to continue on.

"Wait!" Naruto called, "Where's Ai?"

"Oh, she stayed behind. No worries," Hotaru flashed him her sugar-sweet smile.

It was his turn to question her motives. But, true to Naruto's form, he did it in his loyal, never-would-suspect-it way.

"I'll come along. There's no point in me wandering around,"

"No way. Go back to the village, Naruto,"

"I can help. Just tell me what we're doing,"

Hotaru turned on him, "_We're_ not doing anything. Go home,"

She ran for more than twenty minutes. The trees and their shadows filling her vision; the earthy smell of the dirt being absorbed into her nostrils…

A blonde haired, stubborn kid tailing her relentlessly.

She halted suddenly. He almost ran straight into her, "What the hell…?" She blew out a huff of a sigh, "Okay, fine. Whatever. You can tag along… for awhile," She scoped the area they had stopped, "We're camping here tonight. And no ramen for you," She poked his chest playfully with her index finger before stepping off of a branch and dropping to the forest floor.

Camp was set up quickly, probably because it was nothing more than couple blankets laid across the dirt, a scarce amount of food set up, and the canteen of water sitting next to a tree. No fire. Fires attract unwanted guests.

This was much to Naruto's dismay. He whined and pouted for a bit, not knowing the reason she didn't want attention drawn to them. He could really be dense sometimes.

The two of them settled in amongst their respective blankets and clutched a sliver of bread and some dried fruit. Looking at the young Leaf ninja, Hotaru couldn't push the memories of Asuma from her thoughts. She'd said hurtful things; acted selfishly and for what? Nothing. And now he was never coming back. She could apologize to a stone slab all she wanted, but she would never look into his eyes and tell him how truly sorry she was. She could never tell him she was sorry for what she'd done… and what she would do.

"Hello?" A palm waved back and forth in front of her eyes, "Are you awake?"

Hotaru snapped back to attention to realize he had inhaled his share already, "Wha-? Yeah, just… just tired," She gave him a weak smile, but he didn't seem to buy it. To keep him from asking questions she handed him her bread, "Here, I'm not very hungry,"

His eyes questioned for only a nanosecond before he grabbed it and started chomping away, "Hey, thanks. Um… seriously, are you okay?"

"Naruto… what would you do for Konoha?" He seemed startled by the sudden inquiry, "Would you die?"

"Yeah,"

"Kill?"

"Well… yeah, but-"

"Cheat?"

"Yeah,"

"Would you renounce everything you were supposed to be; who you thought you were? Would you hurt your loved ones in the hope that it'd matter to the greater picture?"

Silence engulfed them. Even the crickets seemed to be sleeping at the late hour. Only the steady breathing of the two rippled against the shattering quiet.

"Wha… what do you mean?"

Instantaneously she turned to him with a beaming smile, "Oh, never mind. I get crazy late at night," And she laughed. Her voice was heavy with emotion and her smile fell as soon as she turned from him. She adjusted her blanket and measly pillow substitute in preparation for a terrible night's sleep.

A masculine hand fell on her shoulder.

Hotaru froze at the contact, her eyes wide.

"I'd do anything," Naruto spoke. He sounded more adult than she'd ever heard and that was saying a lot considering he'd just whined for ten minutes about no fire. His voice was thick with loyalty and determination – something she felt she lacked.

But before she could turn to him and declare that he was perhaps the most intriguing ninja she'd ever known, he was already on to sleep. She found him strewn across his blanket, a small snore creeping through his throat.

Intriguing, indeed.

…

…

Kakashi lounged in a curtained booth alone, his arm draped across the back of the seat he sat in. The deep thumping of music reverberated through his very bones. This place was way too noisy for his liking. He'd like to lie across a tree limb absorbed in chapter twenty-seven of Icha Icha Paradise. Yeah, twenty-seven was his favorite.

He patted his pants pocket with his palm. Then his vest. Then everywhere. No Icha Icha.

_What the-? No…_

He was just becoming sour when the curtain slid aside and bright gold eyes met his. Hotaru said nothing as she slid into the booth next to him. She was naked except for a white terry cloth towel that was tied at her breasts. She clung to the knot.

He felt the urge to say something smart about her lack of clothing, but she cut him off… with her tongue.

Her mouth was on his in a hot frenzy. She grasped the back of his neck as she slid onto his lap, straddling him with her thighs. She was scorching hot and wet between her legs. He could feel it though his pants. She rubbed her toweled breasts against his vest in an effort to touch him.

He spoke, "Hotaru, we can't do this," He wasn't quite sure why, "We _shouldn't_ do this,"

His thick erection betrayed him.

Hotaru leaned back, her eyes reflecting his masked face. Long, thick layers of brunette hair fell around her face and draped over her smooth collar bone. Her skin was creamy pale and dotted with occasional freckles. A pink flush spread from her cheeks to her breasts. Kakashi found it irresistible.

"Kakashi," She breathed, holding eye contact with him, "Don't you want this?"

His mind whispered, _'Yes. But everything I love dies. Everything I have is taken away.'_

But the words wouldn't crawl up his throat. Instead he gazed back at her, his cock throbbing from the pressure of her naked body.

Hotaru didn't wait for any definite answer, as if she knew he could never say the words out loud. She didn't need an answer. She just needed him. Her mouth covered his again in a rush of heat. He bucked his hips against her, craving contact.

Hotaru ran her fingers through his silver hair roughly, tugging at the roots briefly, while her other hand tugged his mask to his chin. Her tongue fought with his inside his mouth. Full, soft lips consumed him. Kakashi felt dizzy, though he wasn't even standing. His erection pushed at the confines of his pants, a bead of liquid wetting the tip.

As he was reaching his breaking point, Hotaru started to move and surprised him. Of course, his brain went into overload as it realized how good of a surprise it was.

She was kneeling in the floor under the table and pulling his cock from his pants.

His heart jumped a little at the warmth of her hand. Just thinking about her, he felt he would explode. She gripped his member with strong, slender hands and started to pump. Once he was twitching with anticipation, she moved closer. Before he could catch a breath her hot mouth was wrapped around his hard cock.

Her tongue worked wonders on him as her head bobbed up and down. He could barely see the deep color of her hair from under the table. And, once again unexpectedly, her eyes flicked up to lock his gaze. He could plainly see his own bulge filling her mouth. His rapidly beating heart was thumping even faster after catching her eyes. Two suns were staring at him as she took him with her mouth.

Hotaru brought a hand around to cup his balls as she pumped ever harder, pausing occasionally at the tip to stroke him with her tongue. The deep pink of her tongue against the paleness of his member drove him wild.

Kakashi tried to muster a little blood back to his brain and successfully lowered a hand to her. He wanted her to ride him. He wanted to finish inside her and give her a piece of him.

But she refused. And instead pumped harder and faster, sucking his cock as she moved. He swallowed hard, a few beads of sweat breaking from the pores on his forehead. His thoughts were scattered, an orgasm was about to take him over. He wanted to contemplate why she wasn't taking his hand, but he couldn't concentrate.

She squeezed his balls gently as she sucked and just then he exploded into her mouth. Even his ears tingled as he was engulfed by his orgasm. He felt Hotaru remove herself from him and as his vision returned, he saw her wiping her mouth with her hand.

"Mm…" She smirked as if he was the most delicious thing he'd ever tasted. She resumed her seat on his lap, her naked legs straddling him.

"That was… unexpected," He spoke tenderly into her ear.

She said nothing to him, only buried her face into his neck, the bunched fabric of his mask hiding her face. Kakashi assumed she wanted to be close to him so he wrapped his muscled arms around her and squeezed gently.

But he heard sad whimpers. Was she crying?

He pulled her back to take a look and was caught off guard. The sight before him was gruesome.

Her pupils were no longer the warm color of the sun, but had turned a blood red in their stead. She was crying streams of blood that trickled down her neck. As Kakashi followed the trail of tears his eyes locked onto her chest.

There was a wide, gaping hole over her heart and it was gushing blood that ran down her stomach and thighs to pool onto his crotch. His eyes grew wide and he shook her, "What happened? What happened to you?" He pleaded but she didn't answer, only whimpered and cried tears of blood.

Kakashi's breathing grew quicker when he spotted a picture of his old team on the table behind his lover.

"That wasn't there before," He told her, though she still said nothing, "How did that get there?" The team was soaked in blood, their hearts nothing but a gaping hole just like Hotaru was before him.

"Kaka… shi," She breathed. He sat at attention, "Why won't you help me?" She held her hands up, covered in her own gore, "Can't you see I'm hurt?"

He locked eyes with her. The golden tint of her pupils was returning and was now a mixed variety of red and yellow. There was despair in her eyes, but also something much darker. There was something evil in her red tinted eyes.

…

…

Kakashi sat straight up and his first instinct was to feel for Hotaru in his lap. His second was to feel his own chest.

Cool air hit his lungs as he sucked in deep breaths. His chest was still intact, but Hotaru wasn't around. Then reality hit.

He was sleeping under a thick canopy of trees with Ai. Hotaru was never around. He was never throat deep in her and she was never missing pieces of her body.

He sighed and scrubbed his hair with a rough hand. Ai dropped from a tree directly in front of him.

"Morning, Sunshine," She smiled faintly, "I did some scoping with Pakkun… we're almost there. He can sense her less than a day's distance away and the track stops there so that has to be it,"

He nodded his head. A headache was creeping up his spinal column.

"Kakashi… Naruto's with her,"

His eyes shot up. The possibility that he knew what was going on was slim, but why else would he be around?

"Naruto…?"


	13. Infiltrations

**Note: I hope you guys still like this. =)**

…

…

Hotaru sprinted ahead. Naruto trailed her by only a few feet.

She'd gotten much less sleep than he had last night. Add to the fact that the day had been long and she was no less than exhausted. It felt like she was breathing sand from the dry air moving over her. Her eyes squinted against fatigue.

The sun was setting rapidly. Even then, it was beneath the tree line in their vision.

Hotaru dropped from the trees and held her gloved left hand up. Naruto halted as he was instructed. Her skin was tingling all over like she'd stepped into a haunted house – she could tell something was there, but she couldn't quite see it.

Continuing her steady walking pace along a beaten dirt line, she made her way to a thick tree trunk. Naruto stared at her in confusion as she pressed her naked palm against the bark. She was silent as she circled the tree, her hand still rested on its trunk, like she was contemplating some great puzzle. Her eyes narrowed occasionally as she drug fingers.

Suddenly she stopped. Naruto assumed it was all random. There wasn't anything particularly special about this tree.

"It's not too late to turn back," She barely whispered, "I'm in a lot of trouble and this'll just bring you down too,"

Naruto shook his bright blonde hair, "Doesn't matter. I knew something was wrong with you. I'm sticking around,"

She sighed, upset at his response. The soft bustling of the leaves moving in the wind encircled them. It was strange how far they were from the village, though it didn't feel that far at all. He tried to do the math distance in his head, but was quickly giving up.

"Naruto," Hotaru broke the silence, "No matter what happens, don't tell them who you are," She looked to him, "Don't tell them your name… okay?"

As soon as he nodded, a bright blue light appeared from her hand. It was so similar to Asuma's chakra that he wrapped around his kunai, but there wasn't any weapon. It was a blade… with no blade.

She lifted the glowing hand right beside the trunk and, in one swift move, ripped it through the air. Naruto hear a distinct breaking noise.

That's when he saw The Hideout.

On the forest floor lay a cut white rope and behind that lay a giant mansion. Wood brown in color, it was difficult to make out against the natural setting. Even a few smaller buildings were scattered around the main one. The surprisingly thing was that noises had started up abruptly. The sounds of talking, tools, scuffling in the dirt – Naruto could hear all of these in an instant like they were masked before. He looked to Hotaru for answers to all the questions he couldn't seem to vocalize, but she'd already started forward.

He jogged after her, still amazed by his surroundings. An "ooh" and "ahh" escaped his lips at every turn. A rich person must've lived there. There was no way someone could pay for all this on a regular salary.

Naruto felt poorer than he had before coming into this thing.

They hadn't passed even thirty yards into the grounds when a band of gruff looking men appeared before them. They all wore solemn looks. Some cracked their knuckles, some snarled, but the man in front looked stricken with grief – like his dog had just died.

"Hotaru,"

"I know what you're gonna say," She interrupted, holding her hand up to silence him.

The man was burly. He wore a black eye patch over his right eye and a thick black beard trailed from his chin to his chest. He looked every bit like a pirate would; but not the happy go lucky pirate that would probably sing while mopping the deck. He looked like he was a seasoned killer; like he could break a man's neck with his bare hands. The amazing part was that Hotaru wasn't fazed, not just by him, but by the entire gang.

"I need to speak with Baal-sama," She spoke clearly.

He shook his head, "Don't do this. Don't throw it away. I'm sure he'll punish you and move on. You're one of his favorites," Naruto wondered if he was actually begging her.

"I need to speak with Baal-sama," Hotaru repeated, ignoring the giant.

He grit his teeth and nodded to the men around him. In an instant, they passed to their backs and snatched Hotaru by her wrists.

"Hey!" Naruto shouted as someone came up and grabbed his wrists too.

"Don't struggle," She instructed him as her wrists her bound. Naruto's followed suit. He winced and hissed at the pain. Their hands were bound to the point of almost breaking in order to hinder them from forming ninjutsu signs. He felt a trickle of blood streak down to his fingertips.

They were then pushed forward through the grass and dirt to a small building to the side of the main house. People paused on the tiny street-like path to stare at Hotaru, their mouths agape at the sight. But she walked with her head down, choosing to ignore the attention.

The building was dark and musty even above ground, but as they were lead to a basement, it became difficult to breath for the thick air. Naruto coughed, uncomfortable with the whole situation. But he had decided the day before that he wouldn't abandon his friend no matter what happened. He didn't leave friends to die.

As soon as he was shoved into a barred cell, he slumped down against a corner to crouch in the filthy floor. He fully expected Hotaru to be shoved in there as well, considering it was the only cell in the place that he could see, and he would ask her just what the hell was going on. But one of the men slammed the door shut and pushed her back out of the area.

Naruto shot to his feet, adrenaline pulsing under his skin, "Hotaru!" He called, "Hotaru! Where are you taking her?" He demanded, though the only sound that responded was the distinct _boom_ of the heavy door above him closing to his cries.

…

…

"What's Naruto doing with her?" Kakashi questioned Ai as they, along with Pakkun, blazed through the tree canopy.

"How the hell would I know? I already told you, I barely figured out what she was up to," She retorted, irritated at him already.

The day had definitely been long for the three of them. Kakashi desperately wanted answers and had been warring with himself whether he actually wanted to save Hotaru or not. Ai was frustrated at Kakashi's back and forth casual demeanor and anxiousness. And Pakkun had to listen to them both banter back and forth.

The pup rolled his eyes at the pair and tried to tune them out, instead opting to hang his slobbery mouth open and take in the fresh moving air. He was just starting to succeed when he caught a whiff of something interesting.

"Hold it," He spoke to them as he slowed to pause on a tree branch.

"Mmm…" Kakashi agreed, "I feel it, too, Pakkun,"

"What? Did we find it?"

Pakkun looked to his master and they nodded, "We're right above where it should be. It's interesting, though," He told Ai, "There's so much chakra flow, but there's nothing else to indicate anything out of the ordinary,"

The redhead smirked, "This is where I come in,"

She dropped to the ground and the other two followed, "Okay, I need you to find a certain tree that screams 'stay away'," She told the dog.

He nodded in understanding and started to circle the area, sniffing as he went. Kakashi stood in his usual nonchalant manner, his hand digging deep into his pocket, "I wonder if I have time to catch up on my reading," He announced as he pulled out a bright orange book.

Ai looked at him as if he had sprouted ten heads, "She could be dying right now,"

He scrubbed his silver hair with his free hand and creased his exposed eye, "Sorry, sorry. Just a little joke," The book resumed its protected spot in his pocket.

"Here!" Pakkun shouted.

Ai and Kakashi ran to where he stood, a few yards away, to find the dog shaking.

"I don't know why, but I'm scared of this tree," He looked at the jounin, "A _tree_, Kakashi,"

"It's not you, Pakkun. There's an enchantment on it so people will stay away," She took a deep breath, evidently affected similarly to the mysterious tree, and pulled out a kunai, "Okay, guys, I have no idea what the fuck is in store, but I don't have much of a choice," She lowered her gaze to the ground, "Hotaru is all I've got,"

"Well, Pakkun, this looks like as good a time as any to disperse," And, without waiting, released the summoning jutsu to allow Pakkun to return home.

"Ai," He spoke softly, "I'm not leaving so go ahead and do what you need to do,"

Ai could see whatever spark must've hypnotized Hotaru. Suddenly he was a strong protector, but gentle, too. He had such raw emotion in his expression that she wondered if he really loved Hotaru.

She nodded and sliced the air.

Instantly the Hideout was revealed and he took a step back, his exposed eye widened in surprise.

"Kakashi," Ai mumbled, "Don't let her die, okay?"

…

…

Naruto had lost track of time at this point. The better part of the past few minutes - or hours – had been spent tracing his toe in the loose dirt. He made a smiley face, the Leaf symbol, he'd even drawn a decent bird. But his loneliness and worry didn't falter. He wondered where they had taken Hotaru… what they were doing to her. They didn't look like buddies who were off to have some tea.

The door banged open and he heard scuffling footsteps. Another random footman appeared on the steps, then Hotaru, then another man.

She was slumped over and barely able to walk. No one said a word, they just popped open the cell door, tossed her in like a rag doll, and shut the door.

Once the men were gone Naruto scooted over to Hotaru, who had collapsed by the cell entrance. Her breathing was ragged; blood seeped from her cracked lips. A thick cut ran across her cheekbone. Bruises covered her collarbone and arms. Her bindings were just as tight as his and dug into her skin.

"Hotaru," He called to her, but she didn't answer. A teardrop dotted against his eye, "How could they do this? What do they want?" His voice started to crack with despair. He wanted to do something. He wanted to beat them all down.

"Naruto," Hotaru croaked, her voice hoarse, "This is necessary. It's all necessary. It'll be over soon,"

He shook his head ferociously, angered at the thought of just letting this all go, "No… no,"

"No bones are broken. I'm fine," She tried to reassure him, "I just… need to rest. This all has a purpose,"

"What purpose? I don't understand,"

She ceased to communicate with him and soon fell asleep. Naruto did his best to slide her to a corner so she could sleep in peace.

_Purpose? Screw that!_

He fumed as her breathing became steady once more. How could there be a purpose to all of this?

…

…

The two stalked in the shadows of trees and buildings. If they were seen, and anyone alerted, the whole purpose of their impromptu mission would be lost. They didn't speak for a full hour as Ai led Kakashi around to a tiny shack structure around the back of the grounds.

She checked the windows and, upon seeing it was vacant, signaled Kakashi to follow her inside.

"No fires," Kakashi spoke low. Ai nodded silently in agreement.

The two bundled up in a small nook of the shack. It was getting colder at night and the room smelled like mold. But it was their only option at this point.

Ai sighed against the brisk chill in the air. Her cold hands rubbed her arms in a feeble attempt to warm up. No use. She wondered to herself how she could ever get to sleep.

They didn't have food. Hotaru was somewhere she couldn't get to… probably hurt in some way. If she'd come back here, there was no doubt they done something to her. That was the kind of people they were: they were all killers; every last one of them. Including Ai. But what could you do? It was a tragic story of survival. You kill or be killed. Torture or be tortured. Besides, there was no going back. Hotaru had born the brunt of the messy evil that had enveloped them, but what kinds of sins would Ai have to endure to get her only loved friend back?

And what the fuck would happen after that? There was the deal with the Hokage of the Leaf Village, but that couldn't possibly hold out now. Everything had been found out and they _still_ hadn't gotten rid of any of the bad guys.

She leaned her head back against the wall with a soft thump. She needed to just breathe and concentrate on getting to Hotaru.

Suddenly a big arm wrapped around her and pulled her. Kakashi tugged her to his chest. Her eyes grew wide but the surprise of his gesture took her words from her mouth.

"You're shivering," He muttered with no real meaning in his voice; like she was a cat or a helpless bird that needed warmth and touch.

He said no more after that and she took to opportunity to revel in the feel of his body against her's. She knew he meant nothing, and really neither did she, but she couldn't stop herself from inhaling gulps of his scent and smoothing her cheek over the fabric on his sculpted chest. A surge of fire welled up in her. She'd never been with a decent man; a caring man; an honest man.

Ai was starting to see what made Kakashi so appealing to Hotaru. He was attractive, sure. The hard lines of his jaw were visible under his mysterious mask. His arms and chest weren't bulky, but slender muscle that could kill a man. She knew he could crush her with one move of his ninjutsu, but he was too kind for that. He was too laid back and carefree.

She licked her lips, warming them against the night air. Then she shook her head. She couldn't think these thoughts. She'd seen the way Hotaru was when she was with Kakashi. She loved him, Ai knew it.

Besides, Ai needed to focus on something totally different – like getting in there and out alive. Baal was sure to have hoards of men on the prowl. Not to mention that they were in his fucking kingdom. He was brutal killer. He took joy in killing in the most painful ways.

This was going to be a fucking nightmare.


	14. Battles

She came to in a musty smelling place. The floor dug into her cheek. Metal coated the inside of her mouth.

She groaned against the pressure on her chest; against the headache that threatened to rear its ugly little head.

"Hotaru!"

Someone shouted. It felt like her brain cells were tiny gongs and that person had just beaten every single one of them. She tried to breathe, but there was thick water in her throat. She tried to speak but only gurgled.

"Hotaru, are you awake?"

Someone pushed against her shoulder and that sparked a new sense of pain.

"Fu-" She fought to open her eyes and saw Naruto hunched over her, his hands not visible, "Naruto…?" 

He seemed to sigh relief and sat back on his heels, "Thank goodness. You've been unconscious for almost a full day. They wouldn't check on you and I can't get my hands untied,"

It rushed back to her in a giant, smelly, black wave – where they were, what she was doing, why she was laying in a pool of her own blood.

"What time is it?"

Naruto looked surprised, but answered anyways, "The guard said it was close to ten,"

"A.M? That doesn't make sense,"

"No," He looked stricken, "You missed a whole day. You went under the night before last,"

Her eyes rolled back into her head.

_This is gonna be a shitty day._

….

….

Kakashi lounged in the dark, musty corner of the shack, reading his Icha Icha with practiced obsession. Old habits are hard to break.

Ai had gone out earlier to scout the place. They needed disguises and she knew the layout of the land the best. So she hopped through the only window and crept in between buildings until she was out of his sight. For some odd reason, he wasn't concerned for her safety. Despite being void of ninjutsu skills, she could handle herself pretty well – not mention that she had apparently lined the inside of her jacket with various types of grenades before leaving Konoha.

Kakashi's ears perked at a small scraping noise outside of the window. But he didn't deviate from the worn pages of his book. A true fan didn't need to look away to be aware of his surroundings.

Ai slid through the cracked window.

When she pounced upon him, attempting to place her kunai against his throat, he stopped it with one hand. His eyes and other hand, of course, still solely focused on the plot. She looked discouraged, "Damn, I thought I was pretty sneaky, too,"

He tapped an exposed right earlobe, "You were. My hearing's just really damn good," With a subtle smirk hidden under his mask, he finally looked to Ai, "Your… hair's… different,"

She fluffed it in true beauty queen form, "Oh, yeah, I dyed it," She chuckled, "I _live_ here, okay? I know where stuff's at,"

Indeed, her hair had changed form a fiery red mixture to a flat black. It didn't suit her at all; though Kakashi strangely found himself thankful she at least hadn't cut it off.

Her expression turned grim, "The schedule's set. Bets start at 2; match starts at 3," Ai gave him a heartbreaking look. She wasn't sure of what they needed to do. She needed his guidance.

"So what do you recommend?" He asked her, "You know about all of this better than I do. How does it go?"

She shook her head quickly, attempting to disperse the thoughts, "By now, they've taken her into custody, beaten her, and now she's back in a cell somewhere recouping,"

"What's this fascination with beatings?"

"It's an initiation. But just one isn't enough," Her eyes seemed hard as diamonds in that moment, "Whenever some new situation comes up, that's the answer. If you survive, then you _deserve_ to fight,"

Kakashi nodded slowly, letting this sink in. He'd seen countless bloody acts… it wasn't unheard of for a brutal mob-like leader to resort to beatings and rape to control his empire.

"So… what now?"

Ai thought for a millisecond, "Nothing," She announced, deflated, "They're keeping tight guard on her. She's probably training right now. I guess… all we can do…," She inhaled sharply, "All we can do is sneak in and pray she wins,"

"Who's she fighting?" He felt he already knew the answer.

"Anyone who challenges her. Well, really, she'll challenge Baal, but he'll keep an open invitation. If she can win against all of her challengers, then she'll fight Baal. But it's never been done before, Kakashi; no one's ever actually made it to the top," She buried her face in her hands. Light sobs escaped her throat.

Awkward as it was, Kakashi needed to get the ball rolling. Spotting a wad of clothing at her feet, he spoke up, "So what do you have for me?"

Her head shot up, "Oh, right,"

He had to give her credit; she swiped away the remains of her tears and dove straight into action without another word. She was probably a great partner for Hotaru.

"So… you've go that," Her index finger twirled around her left eye, "Sharingan problem,"

"I wouldn't call it a _problem_," He chuckled.

"Okay, yeah, so anyways, I have an eye patch. It's pretty unconvincing, but there's actually a bunch of guys here missing eyes, so I think you're good to go,"

His eyebrows furrowed, "That's reassuring,"

She ignored him, "I also got you a scruffy looking hat. You're hair a little… famous,"

Ai handed him a badly beaten moss green beanie, "Why does it need to be 'scruffy'?"

"Please," She rolled her eyes, "Does any male here look like they _wouldn__'__t_ be scruffy?"

They both laughed. She also had civilian clothes from him. He liked to think that they were freshly washed and dried. He really had to use his imagination for that one.

"So the match will be at the Dome,"

"Dome?"

"Yeah, it's about a quarter of a mile from here and we can't run so we'll have to start walking now,"

Kakashi nodded as he replayed previous thoughts in his brain. Sure, Hotaru had had a rough upbringing; hell, she'd had a downright shitty life starting close to puberty, but she still lied to him. She'd made him think she was someone she wasn't. How did he feel about coming to whisk her out of this place? And that was if she survived her little match…

….

….

"It's almost three," A thick, gravely voice spoke from the other side of the bars, "Let's go,"

Hotaru looked to Naruto. She wanted to give him words of encouragement, but in the end, how far would that get either of them? She'd learned a long time ago to let it be what it was. She'd win or she'd lose. No kind, reassuring words would change that fact.

Two guards jumped in. One snatched the blonde, who shouted words of protest, while the other grabbed her. She knew her heart should be beating itself right out of her chest then, but she was strangely calm. Was it because she had led comrades down this very road in the past? Was it because she was all too familiar with the proceedings of this event that it didn't seem real anymore?

_Fuck._

The skinny guy lead her up the cold, stone steps long after Naruto had been led out kicking and screaming for them to leave her alone. This guy's name was X. Strange name, but she'd discovered not too long after meeting him that he'd earned the name after doing so much of the similarly named drug. He had major twitching problems as well which was an unnerving thought when you knew for a fact that he had a dagger pointing straight into your back.

As she ascended the steps, she suddenly became aware that she was barefoot. When exactly she'd lost her shoes she had no idea, but the cool touch of the rock felt nice against the soles of her feet.

Abruptly the buzzing noise of hundreds of people filled her ears. They were in a tunnel directly under the Dome. The pounds of stomping feet and cheers of impatient spectators boomed through her very bones. Just above her, hoards of people that she used to command were salivating to see bloodshed; most likely her blood, but any would do.

X pushed her to a wooden box that she knew to be the shittiest elevator in existence, "I'm gonna cut these," His teeth were black from years of abstaining from a toothbrush, "Don't run away," He smirked at her, "I know you're too good for that, though,"

It was true. She'd spent most of her life trying to do reckless things that would get her killed. It was mistaken for pride and honor.

_Fuck._

He slashed the bonds and she instantly brought them to her stomach to cradle. Dirt and dried blood cluttered the wound areas. But there wasn't any sense in concentrating on them.

X stepped back and wiggled an uncharacteristic wave reminiscent of child. She nodded to him just as the elevator lurched and started to bring her up. The sunlight started as a tiny slight obstructing her sight, then grew into a full blown warmth across her body. She brought a dirty palm up to shield her eyes.

Hotaru sucked in a surprised breath.

She'd always heard about it, but had never seen it herself. Baal took joy in knowing that when someone was in the Dome, it was an all-encompassing experience. And it sure as hell was.

She couldn't see any of the audience. She couldn't hear any of the audience. But experience told her they were there, on the other side of the one-way mirror. The inside was about half the size of a football field; enough room for someone to run around and kill another. There were a few thin trees with barely to no foliage, a few rocks, and a long stretch of bare dirt and sand.

Suddenly a pounding, most likely the hidden impatient crowd, reverberated through her body. The sand shifted with the movement; just as anxious to see the flowing of red.

A single seamless door opened directly in front of her. A face she'd seen just a couple days prior appeared. It felt like an eternity since she'd been in the Leaf Village.

Yakunan appeared, an attention-seeking, eccentric costume draping down from her thin body. She was decked out in a bright red, skin tight leather body suit. The whole appearance of Yakunan made Hotaru chuckle to herself. What self respecting ninja, rogue or not, dressed so carelessly? That bright, apple red could be seen from space.

"Ladies and… gents," Yakunan spouted into a microphone, her voice switching into sultry mode as she mentioned the men, "You're in for a fan-fucking-tastic show today!" Stomps boomed again. Leaves shook on tree limbs. Hotaru had the vague feeling she was just like a hamster in a glass box, "You all know her, you all had to do her dirty work, now you have the chance to beat the shit out of her," Yakunan shot her a pig sty dirty look, "It's an open invitation, everyone! Who's the first challenger?"

Though her life was on the line, with little chance of victory, Hotaru couldn't help but laugh. Suddenly her life had taken on like a scene from a comedy. Yakunan was always into theatrics. She was probably a clown in a past life.

Ten beats past.

Hotaru could feel her heartbeat, steady and smooth, in her chest. She could feel it in her fingertips and her toes. Did no one want to fight her?

An average sized man strode through the open door Yakunan had passed through earlier. He bore the scratched-through hitai ate of the Rock Village. For once, he was actually clean shaven, recently bathed, and had all of his teeth intact. He must be new.

Without a word, he approached to within ten feet of Hotaru. Yakunan got the message as he clenched his fists, and backed through the door, slamming it closed with a bang. The rogue nin pushed his fists into the air as he braced himself on the balls of his feet.

Hotaru maintained a nonchalant look.

"Look, kid, I realize you don't know me, but you may wanna back off. No offense," This evidently did offend him.

He lurched forward, fierce punches flying at her with lightning speed. She dodged each with grace. She tossed a back flip, aiming a powerful kick to his jaw as she did. From the blood oozing from his mouth she could tell she'd hit him, maybe even clipped his tongue.

He raged on and attacked again, still relying on his fists. Hotaru zoomed towards him, stunning him momentarily and jumping to step on the crown of his head and land behind him with a soft thud. He was surprised and those few seconds of hesitation was all she needed.

"Ninja Art: Cutting Whirlwind," A large gust of wind escaped her pursed lips, aimed straight for the confused ninja before her. The small distance between them worked to her advantage. Her enemy went top over bottom through the air and slammed against the opposite wall upside down. He fell abruptly to the ground, unmoving.

She approached him slowly, "Listen, I can't waste chakra on you,"

His face shot up. Blazing mad eyes pierced her, "Fuck you," He weaved a sign, she couldn't hear his move, but as the ground started to shift and break she funneled chakra to her feet. As she ran along the side of the wall she witnessed his thoughts come to life: a gaping area broke free and fell into nothingness, leaving a giant black hole that covered half of the center of the area and part of the side where she had been standing.

It was damn impressive for someone who was still fresh to the organization, but as she analyzed him, she found his weakness. Himself.

The poor guy was already spent from his giant move, but he'd gotten no closer to victory. She pitied him.

She sighed as she approached him again, this time sideways on the wall, "You know the rules, right?" He ignored her in place of panting, "To win you live. Loser's are dead,"

At this realization his head shot up. What she saw in his eyes reflected years of pain she'd come across nearly everyday. It was unsettling how accustomed she'd become to it.

He feebly rose to his feet, shaking and weaving. He held up his hands, twisted them, "Earth Style: Mud Blockade," A high, thick wall of earth rose before him, blocking her from him.

She simply put two fingers vertically to her lips and blew. The wall cracked and shattered.

"It's a hundred years too soon for you to challenge me. What did you think you'd get out of this?" He slumped against the wall, clutching his tightening chest. She raised her right hand. A long, smooth blade of chakra emerged from her palm, "I'll make it quick,"

Just as he raised his hands to defend himself, she plunged the blue blade into his chest cavity and directly into his pumping heart.

When she'd first discovered she could use chakra blades, she was ecstatic. Here was a powerful weapon that she could use and didn't need to carry around. But there was an unnerving downside. As she dipped her blade into the flesh of her victims, she could feel them as if she were directly inside of them. She could feel their hearts slowly dying right in her hands. She could feel everything that touched her blades.

It'd taken awhile to get used to this strange and horrific sensation.

True to form, his heart seized and started to beat slower and slower until stopping completely. She hung her head in shame. True, they were all thugs and criminals, but they were all human as well. It was never okay when she'd taken a life. For the first years, she'd gotten sick after every kill, the fresh image of her slaughtered parents embedded in her memory. Now, it was just another tragedy.

Cheerful stomping echoed through the arena as Yakunan appeared again followed by a burly man that rushed to pick up the dead ninja and carry him out.

Yakunan paused a moment to glare at Hotaru as if she knew that outcome of this. Hell, Hotaru knew the outcome. No one had ever survived, but she had a purpose she couldn't ignore. This was all her life depended on anyway.

"Anyone else?" Yakunan drawled into the microphone, still staring at her sworn rival.

Three large men shuffled inside quickly. None bore ninja hitai ate. Who knew where the hell they came from or what styles that had.

Hotaru looked to the closing door just as Yakunan sent a haunting expression her way.


	15. Hardships

**Note: A big thank you to everyone that's been keeping up with this! I hope it still meets your expectations ^-^ **

**Disclaimers: The jutsus mentioned here are half made up and half legit. I tried my best. =P**

The two strangers slid carefully in between a pair of smelly old men in the front row. The space was set up interestingly. It looked much like an ordinary area, only instead of a spacious, grassy circle in the center; it was a spacious partial encompassed circle.

Taking in his surroundings, Kakashi was appalled at the way everything was set up. First, he'd found out that this Baal person had enjoyed partaking in torture and beatings, even of his own subordinates… now it was human cock fighting. But, he thought to himself, that was to be expected.

The space was filled to the brim with an assortment of bullies. Wide, towering, menacing men intermingled with sassy, dangerous looking vixens. He imagined more than a few of them had large bounties on their heads.

His attention was pulled by the sight of a ragged, but fierce body in the ring. Hotaru stood, panting, blood dripping from her right arm. Long, chocolaty strands of hair fell across bare shoulders. She was draped in dirty peasant clothing, but to him… well, to him, he couldn't imagine she looked bad in anything.

The roar of the crowd was overwhelming as they cheered her victory. A dead body was slumped against a wall. Kakashi could see the relief of her win in her face, but her eyes held sadness and regret.

His primal instinct was to rush to her; to call out her name so she knew that he was there and would do anything for her. But, as his foot took a step forward, he caught himself. He didn't know her anymore.

Ai rested a limp hand upon his shoulder, "Kakashi," She whispered into his ear. Her hot breath tickled his lobe, "There's no way in,"

He nodded, though he didn't know what he was agreeing to at that point. It was best to wait out the situation. He couldn't recall how many times he'd scolded Naruto for jumping the gun when it came to important matters.

As if reading his mind, Ai chirped again, this time with concern drenching her voice, "N-Naruto…?"

He tossed his head in the direction to the right and behind them, "He's fine,"

She looked discreetly and her worry was washed away as she saw the blonde ninja kicking up a storm.

"Hey! Hey, let me go! Hotaru!"

Ai smiled, happy that her friend was well enough to cause trouble for the poor souls in charge of him. Then three guys strutted onto the scene.

…

…

Hotaru stood, motionless as the three approached her, trying to encircled her and surround her. They were hardly indistinguishable; all three looking gruff, wide, and menacing. In unison, they popped their knuckles into fists and growled.

"Hotaru-sama, we're gonna need to wring that pretty neck of your's,"

She smirked, "You still have the decency to call me _sama_?"

He looked embarrassed and pissed, "Uh... uh…"

"Oh, cut the shit, let's get her,"

With that, the three attacked. Two were blundering with little grace or speed, but ferocious power. The third darted closer, then stopped short suspiciously.

Hotaru kept an eye on the third wheel as the two came barreling at her. One swung a punch while the other a kick. She dodged both quickly then hopped back to clear herself of their range.

"Holy shit, it's the Twins,"

The Twins were a duo of dumbass and power rolled into one. They were identical twins who had joined before she had, but she'd quickly outranked them as she had most everyone else. The third guy had to be pulling their strings because they liked eating and cuddling puppies. They were too damn stupid to know what they were doing.

"Ninja Art: Mud Crash," One shouted as his fingers danced before her.

Hotaru tossed a few flips head over heels to dodge his mud wall, but at the last second realized it was a poorly thought through trap. The other twin popped up from the ground to grab her, but she twisted her chakra blade into his heart before he could take a breath of fresh air.

His gigantic body fell to the dirt.

His remaining twin roared with anger, tears sprouting from his eyes. Hotaru was sure he was crying his dead brother's name, but she didn't have a chance to decipher it because it looked like a train was headed her way.

The live twin sprinted towards her, his head down and covered in rock. She didn't have a free second to move; he caught her right in the stomach. The twin jammed his rock encrusted head into her, pushed her forward, then slammed her to the ground. Specks of bright red blood flew into the air. He retreated to stand above her.

The world was swimming before her eyes, "Fuu…" She couldn't even get her curse out. The air had been sucked from her lungs and she was sure something had ruptured but her only thoughts were to will herself up. He was going to ram her again and this time it wouldn't be so pretty.

Hotaru barely sat up and wiped a trickle of blood from her lip. And, just as the twin was charging forward, she dashed up, landed on his back and sent a powerful kick to his head. He face planted the ground, grinding his face into the sand and dirt.

She thought that would startle him enough to conjure up a ninjutsu move, but she was wrong. He shot up, turned, and charged her again. He caught her leg this time, but thankfully she wasn't sent to the ground.

She was being pushed closer and closer to the concrete wall and knew that she would be cornered. Then a light bulb struck.

Glancing at the lone ninja further from them, she saw he was patiently waiting.

_Douche__…_ She thought.

The twin charged again. She feigned concern as she slowly backed up, quivering her lip. He bought it and steered right for her. At the last second, she channeled chakra to her feet, planted them on the wall and ran.

He drove straight into the concrete slab.

With his giant, stupid head shoved into the wall, she took the most of her opportunity.

Weaving a few quick signs, she spoke, "Wind Style: Wind Slice,"

Thousands of tiny, sharp blades escaped her lips and soared to the helpless man before her. In seconds his body was sliced to literal pieces. Only his head was still stuck to the wall.

Hotaru turned to the remaining man, "So, what are you waiting for? Don't you want a promotion?"

He chuckled, "Still have a little fire in you, do we?" He placed two fingers delicately to his lips, "So do I," A bright burst of flame spewed from his mouth as if he were a miniature, less scaly version of a dragon.

Her eyes grew wide as saucers as she barely dodged his flames. The realization that this was the worst pair up hit her like a bad omen. Fire trumped wind – everyone knew that. She ran like lightening to the middle of the arena; as far away as she could go while remaining within her range.

"Wind Style: Wind Bullet," Thick, dense bullets of air popped towards him.

"Fire Style: Flaming Eagle," Giant birds made of fire shot out from him and soared towards her bullets. They twisted around the wind until it was swallowed up and disappeared well before reaching him.

"Son of a bitch…" Hotaru mumbled as she sprinted to dodge another fire attack. She wouldn't be able to keep up this cat and mouse game forever. She still had the big shots to battle and she was gradually losing stamina and chakra.

"Fire Style: Raging Flame," Small flames teased around her. They resembled campfires that had come to life and gone to ballet school. She'd be hypnotized by them if they were so damn dangerous.

As soon as the first one came within five feet of her, it burst into a raging fire; far from the cute dancer previous. It singed the flowing sleeve of her shirt.

_Think__…_ She willed herself, trying to stay calm and rational. Hotaru took in her surroundings. She needed a trap. In order to sustain her energy, she needed to lure him then have him finish himself off.

But what…?

She performed a serious of hand signs that lasted a fraction of a second.

But nothing happened.

The stomping of the crowd boomed throughout the arena once more; a sign of their impatience. It was inevitable. When so much money was staked on something, they wanted to know the outcome and there was still so much left to the battle.

She looked to the fire style ninja approaching her and attempted her signs again. Nothing. She tried again. Still nothing.

What was she doing wrong?

Sweat gathered on her forehead as the pressure of his approach started to build.

"What's the matter?" He drawled, purely confident in his abilities, "Given up?"

He stopped; put his fingers to his lips for the last time, "Ninja Art: Fi-"

"Haven't you?" Hotaru stood just behind him, a chakra blade slid under his thick neck, "You really should pay more attention,"

His eyes slid to the side just enough to see a crack in the ground, "You bitch. You were underground?"

"A weak clone was all I needed," She replied, thanking the gods that she'd at least leaned that one jutsu years ago.

She didn't grace him with more words. The blade drug painstakingly slow across his skin and dug into his windpipe. He collapsed to the earth with a gurgle. His hand instinctively clutched at his wound, though to no avail. As he clawed numbly at his blood soaked throat, she stood watch over him. This was the end for him, but she was only beginning.

As a hidden crowd stomped their pleasure into the ground, Hotaru heard a single clap inside the arena.

Yakunan was making her way to the center of the arena, "Great job. You've become a fantastic killer, Hotaru,"

Hotaru scoffed at this unpleasant compliment, "I'm not nearly as soulless as you, Yakunan,"

They exchanged catty stares before another single man waltzed in. Hotaru's jaw dropped clean to the floor.

…

…

Upon completion of the second round, Kakashi turned to Ai against the deafening noise of the audience, "Why're they all stamping the ground?"

"Well," She leaned in close, enveloped by his scent, "Inside, everything's silent so they can't hear when you cheer or anything. But they can feel the vibrations of the stomping… or so I've been told," She looked at him, a certain darkness in her eyes, "I've never been in there before,"

He inclined his chin in understanding. Naruto has ceased his bantering by then. Kakashi wasn't sure if he was enthralled by the fight or had finally lost his breath.

Most likely the fight.

The ringleader woman pranced into the arena, stopping just short of Hotaru. And, just as Hotaru's eyes widened, Ai sucked in a gasp.

"What?" Kakashi questioned.

"That's Kimbo,"

"Kimbo…? Odd name,"

"Well, I don't know what his real name is, but I can't believe he's out there, that bastard," Ai clenched her fists in subconscious anger. She threw a punch to the one way glass in front of her. It didn't even crack.

"What's so special about this guy?" Kakashi leaned back onto one leg and tucked a hand into his pocket.

"He's been the only guy either of us could trust. But I guess that's out the window…" She turned away from the scene, her eyes squinted shut. Drops of tears flecked from her eyes.

"Round three, Pretties…," The ringleader woman announced, "Is us,"

…

…

Hotaru possessed the same sadness of betrayal that Ai held. Kimbo walked to her as though everything were normal. They were back at the mansion. She was eating breakfast and he wanted some bacon.

'_Come on… Just a piece?' He pled with her, still adorned in his pajamas._

'_Geez,__Kimbo,__you__'__re__a__sight.__Why__do__you__think__you__need__to__come__to_my_place__for__bacon?__Or,__really,__any__food__for__that__matter?__' __She__rolled__her__eyes,__playing__with__him__as__she__padded__back__to__her__apartment__kitchen__and__tossed__a__plate__of__freshly__crisped__bacon__on__the__counter._

_He paused like a child contemplating the right answer, 'Because you have bacon…' He announced matter of factly._

_Hotaru burst into a fit of laughter._

Her heart felt tight as he continued to approach, "Hotaru, stop this nonsense. It's gotten out of hand," He tried to reason.

"You know I can't," She whispered, the sting of regret scratching at her vocal cords. She swallowed cleanse her voice.

Yakunan wasted no time pursuing her prey. She wove hand signs, summoning a horde of shadow snakes. They slithered to Hotaru with a frenzy. A handful reached her in record time and snapped at her legs.

But she disappeared into a puff of smoke, revealing a chopped log.

"Substitution…" Yakunan growled, "Kimbo, do something!"

The giant man stood there, his hands hanging at his waist, "That's something I can't do. You said I could come out here to talk some sense into her, but I'm not doing a damn thing else,"

A raging fire awoke in Yakunan. Her eyes simmered to pitch black, "Traitor!" She zipped to him. Snakes escaped her hair; her sleeves, her whole being. They gathered in her hand and turned to steel. She struck the sword deep into his gut, "Bastard! Bastard! You goddamn bastard!" She shrieked as she drove the blade into his torso only to retrieve it and dig it in again.

Hotaru dropped from the tree where she'd hidden during her substitution jutsu and ran like hell to him. He wasn't going to betray her at all. The thought sunk deep inside her chest and grabbed hold. She wanted to weep with joy and grief at the same time. He'd cared. He'd _cared_.

"Kimbo!" She called to him, though he lay motionless in patchy grass. She sent a powerful gust of wind to Yakunan, pushing her back.

Hotaru slid on earth to meet Kimbo and cradle his head, "Kimbo…" She wept. Fat tears fell on his face. His eyes flickered open. At a time when a person would say their final wishes; words of encouragement; even a will, maybe… he was true to typical form.

"What the hell are you doing, kid? Go kill that crazy bitch,"

Hotaru forced a chuckle for him and laid his head gently to the ground. She stood, a fresh anger rising up in her. The ugly face of her one true goal reared its head in her soul. She was close… so close.

Yakunan laughed, "Aww… so sad," She cruelly teased, "So whatcha gonna do, princess?"

Hotaru stepped slowly toward her, her head lowered to the ground. She was numb from the killing; numb from the evil; numb from the blatant disrespect for the dead.

"I feel sorry for you, Yakunan," Her voice was lowered; steady.

"Oh?"

"You've been jealous of me for a long time. But there's nothing to be jealous of. I've lived a long, sad existence. Even I don't want to be me,"

As Hotaru neared her, Yakunan pushed her fists into fighting position, "Jealous?"

"Yes. You wanted his attention, but I was his favorite. For that I'm truly sorry,"

"Hah! Don't feel sorry for _me_! I'll kill you and be done with it,"

"No," Hotaru's head shot up to look her enemy square in the eye. They were a mere foot away now. Bright golden eyes of the sun stared back at the lifeless, black eyes of Hell, "I feel sorry that you want anything to do with him,"

In a split second they went from standing calmly and chatting to a battle royale. Hotaru threw a few quick punches, a couple jabbing Yakunan in the face. Yakunan, on the other hand, sent counter punches and roundhouse kicks, smacking into Hotaru's face and chest.

They battled their taijutsu skills for awhile, the skills fairly even on both sides. Just when it seemed one had the upper hand, the other would cut them down.

Before Hotaru could realize what she was doing, Yakunan had grabbed a fistful of sand when she dipped for a roundhouse kick. She flung the sand in Hotaru's eyes and, when Hotaru was blinded, jabbed a few quick punches. Hotaru cut a few back flips, trying desperately to get out of her enemy's arm range. But, as she was landing her final flip, she lost her footing and tumbled onto her back.

Sand was tangled in her matted hair. She wiped at her eyes, blinking furiously to clear them. Yakunan came into perfect view in front of her. Without breaking their eye contact, Hotaru started to stand, wiping away the dripping blood from her nose onto her sleeve. She could taste the iron on her lips and it only caused the rage within to build.

It was Hotaru who instigated the ninjutsu.

"Wind Style: Wind Slice,"

Yakunan countered by substituting herself with a few of her snake allies. She ran up behind Hotaru, slinging kunai with deadly accuracy. Hotaru dodged all but one. It stuck to the outside of her thigh. Thankfully, karma had worked wonders for her. It had landed in the leg that the Twin had crushed before.

It was already dead weight.

She yanked it from her own leg and it sliced through the air at her enemy. Metal pierced the space between the bones in her rib cage.

Yakunan shouted curse words as she clutched her side and came to an abrupt stop. Hotaru didn't risk the chance and continued running, trying to think of a feasible plan. She absent mindedly thought of Asuma's prodigy student. What was his name?

Shikamaru. That was it.

If she remembered correctly, he was damn good at coming up with good strategies. Too bad he wasn't around. She thought of Asuma; how he chain smoked like it was going out of style; how he laughed at the dumbest jokes; how when she and Ai would dance around, he just watched, laughing, from a corner.

_Asuma_…

Hotaru stopped dead in her tracks.

A shadowy figure stood before her. It was tall and well built, but not as tall as she remembered. Nevertheless, the form made her heart stop.

"…P-Papa?"

Before her, her father stood, smiling at her just like she remembered him. She realized that she was now standing in the very same field that she remembered from her childhood. Her father taught her wind style in that field.

Even the flowers were the same.

"Hotaru…" He stretched his arms out to her, "Hotaru…"

He looked great; healthy. Her throat stung. Her eyes flooded with tears. She could hardly see his face.

She brushed the moisture from her eyes. She wanted to see him. She wanted to see his figure; his facial hair that grew in so quickly; his broad shoulders. She wanted to see his sparkling eyes.

"Papa…" She took a few cautious steps toward him. Nothing happened.

"Hotaru," He beckoned her to reach him, but her feet were planted where she stood.

"This isn't real," She tried to reason with herself. But it was so spot on. It was her dream. It was her life before her horror.

He repeated her name, but she couldn't move. Her arms hung limp at her sides. She wanted to say more to him; to tell him how much she loved and missed him, but her voice was cracked.

"Hotaru," A feminine voice peeped behind her father.

Her mother appeared from behind him, "Its supper time, Hotaru. Won't you come home?" She cocked her chin to the side and beamed with joy. Her hand was outstretched to her daughter.

Hotaru reached out her fingertips, wanting to touch them, if only for a second. She wanted to feel their warm embrace, one last time. Was it so wrong? Was it so bad that she wanted to know their touch just one more damn time?

The tips of her slender fingers nearly reached her mother's.

…

…

Kakashi's eyes were huge; his mouth dropped open a little. Ai was breathless.

Neither of them had known her parents, but they knew from Hotaru's memories who they were.

What had happened…

She reached her hand forward to touch them. From his own Genjutsu experience, Kakashi knew it would all be over then.

_No… Hotaru…_

He willed. She needed to snap out of it. The ringleader woman was approaching fast…

…

…

She extended her hand just a little more.

A little more.

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to just let go. If she died here with her parents, then maybe she could have peace. Maybe she could just rest… finally. She was so tired.

"It's… not real," She murmured.

In a flash, she brought forth a chakra blade and shoved it behind her as fluid as water.

Yakunan clutched her stomach.

Hotaru turned her back to the Genjutsu parents disappearing on her and faced Yakunan. A forceful shove pushed her onto her back and Yakunan fell to the ground. Hotaru raised her hand to deliver a final blow when a snake thick as rope escaped Yakunan's shirt sleeve.

It sunk its sharp teeth into Hotaru's calf and she screamed in pain. The venom burned like fire and the teeth cut like knives. She cut the snake in half before sinking her blade into Yakunan once more.

The woman sneered just as Hotaru grabbed hold of her shirt collar. She dragged her enemy to the edge of the giant canyon her first opponent had created. Yakunan flailed her legs and clawed at her attacker, but to no avail. Hotaru continued dragging her as if nothing were wrong in the world.

She tossed Yakunan beside the crumbling edge of the makeshift canyon, "See you in hell,"

Hotaru kicked her enemy over the precipice.

Yakunan's screams were heard echoing in the darkness until it faded into nothingness. Hotaru sunk into the dirt.

Her will was strained. Her strength was giving out. Her chakra was becoming diminished.

This was how people died in these battles. By the time they reached Baal, they were spent. He wouldn't have to lift a finger. It was his perfect plan.

She sat, covered in dirt and blood and tears. This was harder than she imagined. Would it be worth it in the end? Would it be worth it if she died right here?

Suddenly a strange feeling brushed across her heart. She had an overwhelming urge to stand to her feet. She obliged, but the feeling continued. She knew she just _had_ to walk to the one way mirror.

She approached the wall, only her own image greeting her. She looked terrible. Her hair was matted with others' blood and death. Bruises from the night before discolored her cheek and neck. Her leg was swollen, blue, and bleeding from just minutes before. The snake bite was burning as the venom inched its way up her arteries.

But all of this escaped her attention. She knew where he was.

Him.

_Kakashi is here._

It wasn't a question or a guess. She wasn't coming up with a theory or a rationalization. She knew, without a doubt, that Kakashi was standing before her. A strange music seemed to play in her mind. She felt a great sense of urgency. She wanted to see him; to hold him and feel his skin on her's. She wanted to make love to him again.

…

…

Hotaru approached the glass. Her face told him her entire story.

She knew she was going to die there. She knew there wasn't a way out. How did she know he was there, though?

Kakashi couldn't keep his eyes from her. Though she had gore and death spelled out across her body, her eyes were as bright and sparkling as ever. It was a fitting irony.

"I thought you said she can't see this side?" Kakashi muttered to Ai who seemed as stunned by this turn of events as he was.

"She… can't…"

Hotaru's bloody and cracked lips parted. She looked like strong weakness; like she would break down at any moment, but hadn't lost her will to fight for what mattered.

Kakashi could feel it in his soul. He'd seen this look on more than a few comrades. She'd come to say goodbye to him and he couldn't bear the look. She reached out a hand and placed her fingertips on the glass. Then her palm.

Her palm was pressed directly in front of him. She'd placed everything right into her hand and offered it to him.

Without knowing how or why, Kakashi pressed his large hand against the glass to meet her's. He didn't know if she could feel his presence. It must've been his mind playing tricks on him, but he imagined he could feel her warmth and energy through the glass. His throat tightened.

But the connection was broken all too soon as Hotaru dropped her hand and stepped from the glass.

"Baal!" She shouted to a giant, empty space, "Come out here! Let's finish this!"


	16. Deaths

Hotaru slowly stepped to the center of the barren arena as she called to her greatest enemy. She beckoned him to finish the job he had started over a decade ago.

"Baal!" She screamed at the top of her lungs.

She stood, so very alone, in the dead center. Her clothes had been torn, only one sleeve remained of the pair on her filthy blouse. The peaks of her collarbones jutted from above shabby dirt and blood stained fabric. The sting of the snake bite burned like hot coals through her veins. The poison was spreading rapidly.

She stood there alone; surrounded by hundreds of crazed criminals, but in utter solitude. Her shoulders drooped on her frame; her eyes sagged under pressure. The harsh reality that she may be no match for him by this time was sinking into her brain, but her heart kept her going.

She felt like shouting at him some more, maybe spouting obscenities, but she was drained and saved her energy for whatever decided to walk through the door next.

It opened sooner than she anticipated.

A giant man, larger than any of the others before, stepped through. First, she could see a torn up face coupled with jet black hair. He was nearly bald on top. Even his arms, as large as her entire body, were covered in twisting scars and misshapen tattoos. Upon a closer look, the shining of his metal eyeball was apparent. It swiveled in tune with his other natural eye.

_Baal…_

So he'd finally come for her. Possibly the sudden death of his second in command was what sent him over the edge. He'd never actually entered the arena to battle before. He filled the space ferociously.

As he stepped through the doorway, a menacing sneer streaked across his hideous face, Hotaru caught a glimpse of his weapon of choice. It wasn't really a surprise. She knew what he carried with him. But she sucked in a quick breath anyways. It seemed bigger than life itself.

Slung across the back of his shoulders and neck, Baal held in one hand, the handle of a giant blade. It was even larger than he was himself, but he seemed to carry it with ease. Hotaru remembered that he named it Zeva. It was as thick as his body, but branched out taller than he. Zeva had intricate designs of curing snakes slithering from the handle and venturing up the blade itself. The shiny tip curved up, giving Baal enough room to slice a person clean in half.

"Hotaru," Baal purred as he strode in, confident of his skills and the sword he carried. "You've been a naughty girl,"

Since Hotaru was a girl, she could never remember a time when he was well schooled or mannered, though he'd improved in recent years. Baal was a barbarian and that was all there was to it, but there was a definitive reason he was so high up on the totem pole. He was a ruthless son a bitch. He played dirty. He took what he wanted and left the scraps for the dogs. How he had gotten so many followers was a true mystery to Hotaru, but she aimed to bring him down.

Now if only she could come up with a good plan. She'd used more chakra than she had banked on when she came here and now she was on a serious time crunch because the venom in her blood stream would spread further, inhibiting her movements very soon. If that happened…

"I don't appreciate you bringing down my best girl," He sneered as he approached her.

Hotaru ignored his attempt at riling her up. Her mind was racing.

He lunged at her before she could come up with anything good, and swung Zeva. She ducked, losing a few strands of hair to the enormous blade. In one fluid motion she tucked and rolled to the side just as Zeva sliced through the air and struck dirt. It was amazing how much strength he had that he could go from one swing to another instantly.

Hotaru jumped to her feet and sent a kick in Baal's direction. She smacked him in the face, but he wasn't fazed. He turned in her direction and swung Zeva through the air. She hopped, tucking her legs under her and, as Zeva sliced under her, she stepped onto the metal, ran up the blade, and double kicked Baal in the head once more.

It didn't have much of an effect. He took one step backwards and shook his head. Hotaru took her chance.

"Wind Style: Wind Snake Jutsu!" An enormous serpent comprised of wind struck from in front of her and lashed out at Baal. He jumped back, sliding on sand, dirt, and tiny pebbles as he landed.

"Roar, Zeva!" Suddenly his sword burst into flames. He ran, wielding his blade by his side and swung fiercely at her wind snake. The snake swerved and dodged as best as it could, giving Hotaru the break she needed to escape. But Baal won out as the fire in Zeva smashed the wind to nothingness.

Hotaru attached her feet to the wall once more, allowing herself to get behind him. She darted for his body. She tossed lightening fast punches and kicks as he swung his sword and slammed it to the ground. She had to get creative to get close enough to his weak points since he towered above her. An opportunity arose and she dashed from tip toeing on Zeva to stand on his shoulder briefly enough to slam her heel directly into his natural eye.

He shouted and dropped his weapon to paw at his injured eye. It was stupid to think she could move Zeva so she did the next best thing.

"Wind Style: Wind Blast,"

A terrifying gust of wind shot forth and knocked him head over heels about twenty yards backwards.

"Wind Bullet," She shouted before he could stand to his feet. Baal was bombarded with five huge wind bullets.

He lay on the ground, breathing heavily and bleeding from his face and chest. He didn't move, only laid there with his eyes closed.

Hotaru was suspicious of his intentions. Had she actually knocked him hard enough to disable him or was he just pretending? She inched closer, cautious of his movements. He didn't stir.

She approached from his feet and move closer to his head. He still didn't move, only groaned and breathed hard. Hotaru kicked him with her foot, retreating quickly after she did.

Nothing.

Her eyebrows furrowed. She expected much more of a fight. She was just about to ready her chakra blade when he sat straight up and grabbed her ankles, sending her falling to the ground. It knocked the wind out of her lungs, but she didn't have time to worry about that. She briefly saw Baal stand to his feet and snatch her from the ground.

He tossed her in the air and as she came flying back to earth, he slammed a powerful into her back. She heard a snap and spewed blood from her lips.

Baal jumped high into the air to follow her and grabbed on to her limp body, "This is gonna hurt," He laughed into her ear as she was helpless to stop him. Baal held her from behind and turned them head down to the ground below. She couldn't see much, but she could tell they were spinning faster and faster.

They slammed to the ground and heard a crack from her skull.

She'd been head slammed into the earth and was on the brink of unconsciousness. The world was silent. She cracked her eyes. They stung from the blood. Baal was laughing and speaking to her, but all she could hear was the steady, slow beat of her heart and her ragged breathing.

Her throat stung. She'd failed. She was going to die here, alone, in this enclosure with the one man she hated the most in this world. She failed her mother and father; she failed Ai; she'd failed everyone she'd ever known. She failed Kakashi.

Tiny pebbles and debris dug into the left side of her face. Tears started to trickle down and smoothed over her nose to plunge to the ground. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to force reality from her mind. Her body was growing weaker by the second. Even if she could sit up now, the venom from the snake would likely finish her off before she could do anything.

She could taste the iron taste of blood in her mouth. She could taste the salt in her tears.

Years ago, she swore to the memory of her parents that she would avenge them. She swore that she would avenge herself. But she was too powerless as she lay, helpless, on the ground.

Baal strode to her and crouched next to her. He grabbed her limp head and held it up, laughing and shouting something. Then he dropped her head to the dirt with a thud.

Her body was becoming numb. She couldn't even feel the sting of the poison anymore. She spit blood from her mouth in an attempt to clear her windpipe.

_This__is__the__end._ She thought, unable to speak the words.

A blurry vision of Baal was walking away from her. But he stopped, apparently too cocky to continue without on last word. He stooped beside her again to mutter vile words, "You know," He started, "It was great having your mother… then you," Hotaru's eyes grew wide at this new information, "But the best part…" He smiled, evil pushing through every pore in his body, "The best part was that you followed me like a dog for the rest of your goddamn life. You accomplished nothing. You did everything I ever asked, then you have the balls to challenge me… and lose. Die a miserable death just like your miserable life,"

He stood and kicked her hard in her stomach. She curled into herself, coughing and sputtering blood.

_It was great having your mother…_

She clenched her fists, a ball of fire gathering in her chest.

_Your mother…_

She pushed her head up as much as she could to see him walking away from her.

_Then you…_

Her life had been wonderful and then, one day, he just ran in and destroyed everything. _Everything._ She needed to remember there was a reason she was here. There was a reason she had endured.

A horde of unidentifiable men ran in the half opened door where Baal stood. They shuffled towards her, preparing to finish her off where she lay. But she gathered all of her strength and pushed herself from the dirt.

It was difficult to catch her breath, but she managed as she sat on the earth, her feet under her legs.

The men circled around her, making it impossible to escape, but she didn't pay attention. Her mind was racing; her chest on fire. She only felt rage. She only wanted to kill him.

Hotaru punched the ground with what little strength she had left, vaguely aware that a wind had started to pick up. She looked to a group of the men around her. Instantly they gasped and stepped back, their eyes widened in terror.

…

…

Kakashi sprinted through the bustling crowd, anxiously searching for the door that would lead him inside. Hotaru was laying limp on the ground and a sea of ninja was piling into the arena to finish the job Baal had started. Ai shouted to him, stuck far behind him in a crowd of people, but he couldn't heed her cries. He needed to get to Hotaru.

But the crowd stilled. Everyone together. Next to him, Kakashi heard a man whisper, "Jesus…"

Kakashi looked to the other side of the one way mirror to Hotaru. She was sitting on the earth. Everything about her posture – head down, shoulders lumped, back weakened – suggested she was done for, but Kakashi saw what everyone else had.

She looked up to a group of men crowded around her with pure unchecked rage. Her eyes had turned from a sunny gold to a menacing red color. A steady wind was picking up.

The ninja around her hesitated, unsure of what to do, as she shakily stood to her feet. She swayed, unstable so far up, but as soon as she steadied herself her gaze went directly to Baal.

To Kakashi it looked like someone possessed. She didn't move like a human or have the gaze of a human. Her eyes glowed red. As she started to walk towards her prey, her feet shuffled forward. As she picked her feet barely off the ground, the tips of her toes would drag the dirt just a little. Her arms dangled carelessly at her sides.

Kakashi ran once more, searching for a way in, but he didn't keep his eyes from the situation inside the arena. He pushed through gaps in the crowd, elbowing people as he went.

Without weaving any hand signs or chanting, a powerful cyclone had built up around Hotaru. It had become so fierce that her clothes and hair whipped around uncontrollably. It didn't appear that she noticed or cared, though, for she only kept her eyes on Baal as she stumbled toward him.

Baal seemed reasonably shocked at this turn of events and, just as his hand reached for the door, it slammed shut with such force that it actually cracked down the middle. He froze and turned to look at Hotaru.

She hadn't moved from her previous state but he, like everyone else, knew it had been her doing.

Frantic, the men lunged forward at her. Some brandished sharp weapons; others depended on their brute strength. But, without lifting a finger, the huge cyclone caught them. They were flung to the walls and ground – some even across the arena. The clattering of shattered bones and falling weapons rattled inside the enclosure.

Another wave of ninja prepared to attack. Half of them tossed kunai and knives in her direction while the others sent ninjutsu attacks. She didn't pause in her walking, but held up a hand arm to them. The hand attached was limp and dripping with blood.

As soon she lifted her palm to face them, hell broke loose.

It was like an entirely different attack A burst of wind shot to them and ripped the clothes and flesh from the ninja attacking. It caught the blades that were thrown and turned them with ease. Just the wind sent the weapons flying straight back to their owners, piercing them in the eyes, the throats, and the torsos.

The few remaining dropped to their knees and cowered, afraid of what she would do to them if they advanced.

"Get up! Get up, you pussies!" Baal screamed at them, growing more nervous as she neared him. He sprinted to try and sneak around her, but she held out her hand again.

It stopped him dead, "I-I can't move," He sputtered, the whites of his eyes taking over his pupils, "Help me, you assholes!" But no one listened to him. They stayed in their safe positions.

Hotaru turned her head to look directly at him, red eyes glowing like embers in a fire, "There's no escape," She muttered to him and she flicked her wrist.

Baal's giant body soared directly upwards as if by some strange phenomenon then, with the slightest of hand movements, he was sent spiraling down again. As soon as his form smashed into the ground, it sent debris flying. A large, round crater had torn itself into the earth and, directly in the middle, was Baal's limp body.

The torrent of wind continued to screech about Hotaru as she steeped ever closer to her enemy. Her mind was blank. She could only think of how she wanted to rip this man to pieces. She couldn't even remember where she was.

Kakashi breathed a brief sigh of relief when he spotted the door nearby. As he pushed and shoved his way through the thickening crowd, he watched a crazed Hotaru step down into the crater where Baal lay. As soon as Baal saw her, he tried to scramble backwards to get away. His fingernails dug deep into the earth as he whimpered and cried.

The wind of her rage blew his tears sideways and matted his stringy hair in the streams. She seemed unaware of the effect she had on him and she staggered forward in a zombie-like trance.

Two guards rushed forward to tackle Kakashi as h approached the door in a hurry. They aimed to keep him out, but that wasn't an option for him. He glanced behind him quickly and realized that Ai was completely lost to the crowd now. It was better that way. He wouldn't be able to concentrate on getting to Hotaru if he had to worry about the chakra-less Ai.

It only took a single punch in the face of each guard to knock them out.

Pathetic.

He glance around to see if there were any other objectors, but everyone, wide-eyed, stumbled backwards out of his way. He gripped the handle and pulled as hard as he could.

It didn't budge at all. He peeked out of the glass to see how Hotaru was doing and stopped in his tracks. His hands fell limp from the knob at the sight.

Hotaru stood over her enemy, chakra pouring from her right arm. She looked crazed. Red eyes glowed in the dim light. Her hair whipped wildly around her as she raised the blade, but Kakashi realized it wasn't a blade he had seen her used before.

She had fashioned a saw from her chakra and was holding it over a cowering Baal.

With a shout she swung it down upon him. He held up his arms out of instinct to protect himself, but the plan didn't work.

She dug the saw into his right shoulder and started to push it back and forth. Baal shouted out in agony as blood spurted and flowed from the wound. He cried and sputtered.

When his arm was successfully removed, she picked it up with no remorse and tossed it away from the and out of the crater.

Then she turned to him again, "I want you to beg for your life, Baal,"

"P-p-please…" He muttered, sobs escaping his white lips.

She panted, "I want you to apologize for destroying my village; for killing everyone,"

"I… I'm sorry,"

"I want you to apologize for killing my father; for raping and killing my mother," She paused, emotion returning to her in a rushed wave. She slammed her eyes shut as a stream of tears betrayed her and escaped.

"I want you to…" Her throat caught, "I want you to apologize for raping and killing me,"

"What? Baal attempted to sit up in his feeble state and failed, "I didn't kill you," He attempted to reconcile.

"You killed everything about me!" She shouted at the top of her lungs. Baal was quiet and still, "You killed my childhood, my future. You killed my soul," Hotaru started to sob. She wiped the tears with her arm, thick blood dripping from the tips of her saw.

"I'm sorry," He breathed. Baal was turning pale white quickly. He was too weak to sit up. Internally he probably pleaded to his men for help, or even god, but she ignored his sad state.

"That's not good enough!" She screamed as she dug her saw into his other arm. It wasn't clean work as the other had been. She was tired and frantic now. It was a crime of passion and she wanted him to feel it.

She didn't think about what she could gain by tearing his arms off one at a time instead of just stabbing his beating heart. But this is what she had woken up to. This is what she was dealing with now.

She sawed clumsily, but fast. Hotaru couldn't keep the tears from falling as she did. She coughed with guilt, sorrow, and disgust.

Blood was spattering onto her face and in her mouth. She spat to rid herself of it.

When she finally came to her senses, she stepped back in a daze. It was almost as if she had gotten drunk on revenge. She stumbled backwards out of the crater and stopped at the rim.

As she looked down on the lifeless, armless body, all she could see was relief. She'd survived the challenge and avenged her parents, her village, and herself. She wanted to fall to her knees, but couldn't even do that. She just stood, her hands at her sides, and looked on.

Warm blood dripped slowly from the tips of her curled fingers - evidence of her sins.

Hotaru thought, vaguely, that she should try to get out of the arena before anything more happened. She started to back up once more, still unaware of her surroundings.

…

…

Kakashi returned to the door desperate to get to her and relieved that it was over. She'd done horrific things, but he had to get to her. He had to make sure she was safe from now on.

He pulled the door again and, again, it didn't budge. After a few more failed attempts, he decided he would just kick it down when an older man stepped forward, skittish. The old man twisted the knob and pushed.

"Of course," Kakashi grumbled to himself as he rolled his eyes and stepped through, "Thanks!" He told the stranger.

Then he locked eyes with her. His heart skipped a beat.

…

…

Hotaru heard a scraping and click. When she turned her head to the left to see what was going on, she saw him.

Kakashi was actually right there with her. He was looking directly at her and her heart soared with happiness. Until she felt a sharp pain.

It was something she'd never felt before – about a million stabbing pains at once spread out over her body. In an instant her eyes turned from overjoyed to hazy. It was like she was looking at something sad in the distance. A trickle of blood escaped her mouth.

She knew without a doubt that someone had stabbed her and now her body really was dying. Whether it was the snake's venom or whatever was stuck in her, she was done for. Her body was frozen where it stood, but she could move her head just enough to glance down.

She was right.

There were countless shards of ice jutting through her skin from behind. They ran from her chest all the way down her torso to her legs. Gripping suffocation took her. She coughed more blood this time.

Kimbo used a jutsu comprised of ice.

The ice retracted and she fell, spinning to the side. It was then that she realized where she had been standing – right next to the canyon that the first challenger had created. She fell over the edge, her hands drifting above her.

She wasn't quite reaching out to someone to save her. She was more like reaching out to those she would be greeting soon.

She thought of her father with his stern, yet joyful face and her mother who always held love in her heart. She thought of Asuma who she'd wronged. If she had told him that the Akatsuki were going to Konoha he probably never would've been killed.

He could be there for Kurenai and their daughter.

In her final moments, Hotaru grieved for the people she had wronged, but she was in peace at last. Her life since Baal had barged in had been nothing but evil deeds and plotting revenge. He was finally dead and so she could die as well.

The dark air engulfed her as weightlessness took her breath. The hair that wasn't matted in blood flew upwards and around her face. It was comforting to die with the sensation of the wind around her.


	17. Endings

**Note: Coming to the conclusion! ^_^**

…

…...

Kakashi jumped straight through the doorway and locked eyes with a sunset. They had brightened at her sudden victory. She'd won freedom for her and Ai. He could see the grief and tension rise from her shoulders where she stood.

But it happened in slow motion.

The man from before, Kimbo, staggered from behind her. He raised his hands to the sky and when he brought them down, he slid dozens of needle sharp ice shards into her fatigued body.

She never broke eye contact with him. Not once.

A sparkle of a tear escaped her eyes. The light in her eyes started to dim. She tried to maintain vision of him, he could tell, but it faded. It was like she was looking at something beyond him; beyond what that world could see. She was looking into the beyond.

He was frozen in shock; in grief.

As she started to tumble over the edge of the cliff, all hell broke loose. The fury of the crowd angered at the out-of-bounds kill echoed through the arena. Piles of infuriated men and women swarmed in around him, heading straight for the traitor.

Flashes of a distant past pounded his brain. One last glimpse of Obito as the rocks fell in; running to Rin as she lay bleeding on rain soaked earth. They gripped him from his very core and he felt as if he would crumble under the pressure. His lungs were being squeezed; his bones felt like they would break; his heart was going to burst.

Kakashi caught a glimpse of bright yellow hair streak by him.

It only took his name to shake him back to reality.

"Kakai-sensei!" Naruto screamed as he summoned a horde of shadow clones and dashed to Hotaru's attacker.

Kakashi felt as if he had opened his eyes. Only her arm peeked up from the edge of the man made canyon.

Her eyes were almost fully closed. Blood covered her from head to toe. It was difficult to tell what was her's and what was the result of her murderous frenzy. Still, she looked like an angel falling from the peaks of heaven straight to the depths of hell.

He leaned way over and snatched her hand before she could slip away forever.

Naruto was battling Kimbo; ice was flying everywhere. Somehow the crowd had turned into a mass pit of violence. Everyone fought each other. There were no allies.

And yet…

And yet Kakashi kneeled on the ground, clutching at Hotaru. His throat burned and he swallowed trying to relief the flames. Hotaru lay limp in his arms. He thought she was gone until her eyes cracked just slightly.

She didn't say anything. She couldn't. Her lungs had been pierced along with the rest of her body. She wheezed and rasped against Kakashi's chest. The gore smeared across her dying body transferred to his own.

He wanted to say something. He wanted to say something wise or loving like he had summoned with Rin, but he was at a loss. Maybe the trauma of losing everyone close to you had finally gotten to the better part of his brain for all he could do now was cradle her.

As he looked upon her, she parted her lips just enough to give him the faintest smile. If he hadn't of already known her coy expressions, he would've missed it, but it was clear as day. She opened her eyes just a little more and smiled at him.

He thought his heart would burst.

But it soon faded along with her breathing; her heartbeat. And she sank into his weakening arms.

By the time Naruto found him, he had lost track of the days and time. He couldn't look up and away from her face. He wanted to cry but the tears had dried up years ago. Ai rushed forward and her screams were a muffled haze. He was so numb he couldn't even resist when Ai tried to pull Hotaru to her as she sobbed.

Naruto looked stricken. He put his hand gently upon his sensei's shoulder.

…

…...

Tsunade heaved a great sigh, "Sakura can handle that. She's plenty capable," And turned back to pretending to settle some paperwork.

Ai was listening outside the door to the conversation when the Konoha nurse stepped through. The nurse nodded to her to continue their chat further down the hall.

"Is this Sakura person any good?" Ai questioned, frantic and disheveled at the lack of sleep in the past few days.

The nurse turned to her, "She's great; like a tiny Tsunade," She stopped and smirked, "Attitude and all,"

Ai knew she should take comfort in the nurse's humor, but she was too stressed and worried, "Do you…" She paused in the middle of the hallway, "Do you think she'll make it?"

The nurse paused, turned and smiled at Ai. She rested her hand on Ai's shoulder as a mother would as she consoled her child, "If she's a tough as you say she is, with Sakura's help she's got a chance,"

The damage was extensive. A multitude of bones were broken, she needed stitches, but none of that was nearly as bad as all of the puncture wounds. Organs were punctured. Tissue was punctured. Even her heart was punctured.

Tsunade had told Ai that she looked like a "barely living pincushion". She'd promised to do everything they could. That was rich considering all the trouble they had put a village they didn't even belong to through.

Ai had been given a vacant hospital room on the same floor as Hotaru, but spent most of her time with her long time friend.

Hotaru received many concerned visitors. Hell, even the guys that guarded the gate came by to see how she was. They all walked in on a grim sight: she was battered and bruised, her wounds kept bursting open and bleeding on the sheets, and she was hooked up to a respirator that perched by the bed.

Kakashi had yet to come by.

She saddened and infuriated Ai. He acted like he cared before, but in the end, everyone was the same. It was kill or be killed. That was what Hotaru had taught her and it rang true every time. But there was too much to be concerned about instead of worrying about some guy.

Ai flopped down onto her Konoha Hospital standard issued bed and closed her eyes. Maybe she would just sleep and when she woke up they'd be on a deserted island somewhere with all the mixed drinks they could stomach… and more.

…

…...

Everything hurt. Slivers of light seeped through to bruised and swollen eyes.

They cracked open.

A pristine white ceiling hung from above. The only sound was the steady beeping of a heart monitor; the gentle whirr of a respirator nearby.

No one was around.

…

…...

Ai stood outside of Kakashi's apartment. The fading rays of a setting sun beamed through the windows and onto his door as if an illuminating sign from god. She'd been standing here for the better part of an hour.

Hotaru deserved more than this. People they didn't even know where visiting in the hospital. But he was no where to be found.

She raised a fist to the door, breaking through the sunlight, but froze.

"Yo," A smooth, casual voice broke from behind her.

She jumped and spun around. He was stepping up the steps, one hand in his pocket and the other wrapped around a brown bag with leafy greens and the top of a milk carton peeking out.

"Kakashi!" Ai exclaimed, unable to form a coherent sentence in her surprise.

"That's me," He replied as he headed for the door.

She stepped into his direct path, "You haven't come by,"

Without even making eye contact, he made a move to push past.

"Why?"

It was a simple question, but one that stirred so many emotions. Her heart was pounding at the anticipation of his answer. Kakashi stopped and looked at her directly, "I've completed my job. It's done, Ai,"

Ai shook her head, "Job? What job? What the hell are you talking about?"

"An innocent person was about to be killed. I aided in her recovery. She's getting medical attention. I can't do anymore,"

He side-stepped around her and drug a key from his pocket with his free hand. It was like she was nothing.

Ai stood there, angry tears building in her eyes; her fists clenched by her sides. She bit her lips fiercely.

"Bullshit," He turned to face her, "This is bullshit. We both know, Kakashi. Don't pretend you don't give a shit. I mean, they don't know _what_ could happen. She's not out of the woods yet,"

She wanted to collapse on the ground where she stood. The last week or so had been hell on her. Whenever she thought of where they had been just a few weeks ago – in their "normal" world, not even knowing these Konoha people – she felt like she was dreaming. It felt like years ago.

Suddenly, an unexpected anger roused in Kakashi. He shoved his front door open and slammed his free hand against the door jam, causing a crack in the wood frame, "I don't know who that person is," Before Ai could say a word, he continued, "I can't go in there, Ai,"

Kakashi disappeared behind the giant wooden door and slammed it shut. Ai pounded at the door, pleading for him to reconsider, "Kakashi!" She shouted to the other side, "Kakashi! She loves you!" She rammed her whole body against the door, "She loves you, damn it!"

Moments passed, but the door didn't open. Not a sound was heard from Kakashi's side. Ai gave up her noise making and pressed her forehead gently against the material.

She whispered, "She says your name in her sleep," Just before retreating down the stairs and into the falling night time.

…

…...

Kaisa sat at her desk, only the soft glow of a single lamp nearby to light the way of her pen. It seemed like there was an endless amount of paperwork and she blew out a sigh in frustration.

"I can't believe she left me this much damn paperwork at the start of my shift,"

She scratched her head and returned to the form in front of her, "Several large lacerations to the torso…" Her pen scribbled as she mumbled to herself, "Twenty-seven stitches… Sixteen…"

The front door squeaked open and she looked up. A smile drug across her face, "Oh, Kakashi-san," Her heart fluttered at the sight of him clothed in darkness, "What are you doing here?"

He approached the desk, giving the nurse a signature eye crease as a greeting, "Kaisa, I'm here to see someone,"

"Oh?" She searched the desk for a list of patients currently checked in.

"She's a foreign nin… Hotaru,"

"Oh, yeah. She's in room twelve," She tried to give him her most sultry gaze, "Should I show you where it is?"

He didn't seem fazed, "No thanks," And padded down the darkened hall.

She huffed and crossed her arms across her chest. It was fine that she was shot down, again, by the famous Copy Nin, but to have to follow that up with the rest of these forms? That was too much.

…

…...

It didn't take Kakashi too long to find room twelve. His hand paused on the handle.

"You came," A feminine voice whispered in the night. He smiled to Ai who stood next to him.

He slid the door open and stepped through. But there was nothing in there. The bed was empty and had fresh linens arranged neatly across the top. There were no personal items. No one sat in the vacant chair in the corner.

Nothing.

"Wrong room?" He asked the woman next to him, but his heart had a sinking feeling that it wasn't.

Ai couldn't move. Her face had gone white and her hand was splayed across her mouth, "She's gone," Tears overflowed from her eyes and she fell to the disinfected floor whimpering.

The next few hours were a whirlwind.

Kakashi dropped Ai off in her room with a nurse attending her. She sunk down into her bed with reds eyes and wet cheeks. Her eyes were almost swollen shut from sobbing for so long and for so hard. He then ran to chat with a few doctors who didn't seem to understand what was going on. No of them could recollect a female foreign ninja who had come in badly injured.

He tracked Tsunade down the hospital and stopped her in a hallway. She didn't know anything and didn't seem to care too much. Her work load was full and she was on her way to surgery as Kakashi trailed behind her like a lost pup.

His next stop was the morgue. It took a whole different strength to be able to push the swinging doors open. The whole floor smelled like death.

And Kakashi had smelled his share of death in his lifetime.

But the mortician was clueless too.

With a sense of relief and worry settling in his stomach, Kakashi made his way back up the three flights of stairs back to Ai's room. He was out of ideas and no one besides he or Ai seemed to remember she existed.

It was like she had fallen off the face of the planet.

…

…...

Two months later the moon hung brilliantly above Konoha like a goddess keeping watch over her cherished followers. She smiled brightly upon the sleeping town as a heavy rain beat down upon the earth.

She stood in water that reached almost to her ankles. She was soaked through to the bone, but stood loyally despite the downpour in front of a bright red door.

'_She's bought a house for herself,' He told her as he smiled, 'What d'ya think of that?'_

It was beautiful.

She stepped under the awning and out from the rain. In an instant she found herself slid into the small opening she created in a window. Ai was in the very same room, turned in the other direction.

The house was small and quaint. It was funny to see how people acted, and what they liked, when they weren't forced; when they were finally free. She was rummaging through a drawer in a wooden desk that looked old as dirt.

She was frozen, unable to say what she had finally come to say. Her heart broke at the thought of saying goodbye. She wanted to stand here for eternity and just watch.

Ai suddenly stopped what she was doing and froze. Then turned her head to the side. Then spun around.

"Hotaru," She gasped at the sight of glowing golden eyes.

Neither of them could find the strength to move. One – too scared and mournful to bid her friend farewell. The other – too shocked at the sight of someone who should be a ghost.

The stared into each other's eyes for what seemed like hours, tears threatening to spill over in two sets of eyes. It was the red head that broke the trend with a grin.

"I knew you'd be alive," Hotaru's eyebrows drew up in surprise, "After I thought about it… I knew you couldn't be dead,"

With this, an old, familiar form stepped from the shadows outside. The giant man, Kimbo, had appeared. He smiled sheepishly and waved to his old friend.

"It was all a scam, wasn't it?" Ai questioned, though already knew the answer, "You always meant to leave me here – with you're 'I need to take care of you' and all that," She half-heartedly laughed, realizing the truth behind it all, "You knew I'd come looking for you so you had Kimbo deliver the final blow. That way we'd both come back here and you could sneak out again," She huffed a chuckle, "It was brilliant," Suddenly her eyes lit up, "You're the leader now, aren't you? Is that what this was about?" Her eyes grew wide, "I can't believe I never thought about it. If you kill Baal, you take his place at the top,"

Hotaru rushed forward to embrace Ai, "I'm so sorry," She buried her face in lush, red locks, acutely aware of the squashing sound of her clothes as she moved. Ai pulled her face back and spoke, "Don't be sorry. You're a fucking genius. Besides, I'm doing fine here. I'm sure you've been checking up on me," She chuckled.

Hotaru wiped her face like a child and smiled, "Yeah, you're right," They laughed together like old times.

"If you need me, you know where to find me," Hotaru said on a more serious note.

Ai nodded in response, "Now go. You need to get out of here before anyone sees you. I'm sure that'd be an interesting conversation,"

Hotaru retreated to the window and slid out of the crack again, but couldn't resist one last look at her best friend. They'd suffered so much together it felt unnatural to part ways after all this time.

Ai watched Hotaru disappear into the darkness of the shadows and only after she was about to return to what she was doing did she notice a brown linen sack lying on her chair. She walked over to it, ran her fingers over the soft, wet material, and undid the drawstring. A bundle of money tumbled out and onto the floor in front of her feet.

…

…...

Kakashi shuffled out of the bar and out into the pouring rain. He wouldn't have noticed the drops beating down on him if it weren't for the deflating mop of hair hugging his head. He shook his head, quite similar to a dog's, and continue to walk carelessly down the darkened street.

Looking back, he should've known what was bothering him, but hindsight's always perfect vision. This night he assumed he was 'living it up' like young bachelors did. Too bad he wasn't so young any more.

He thought about how wild Obito would be if he were here. He'd probably be using his Sharingan for petty and sinful things, knowing him. But wasn't it Kakashi who used it to have a sexual romp with a certain missing nin?

God, that felt like ages ago.

The Leaf nin had searched briefly, but to no avail. They assumed she was dead, but that made no sense. How would someone who had a decent chance of pulling through just suddenly up and died one night? And to further confuse things, even if she had… wouldn't there be a body…

Somewhere…?

It was like she had disappeared off of the planet. As much as the crazy, irrational, Obito side of things wanted to turn up every piece of matter looking for her, the rational, logical, young Kakashi side waited. Well, waited and got drunk nearly every night.

Even that part sucked. Apparently his tolerance had been built up more than he realized. He could drink for hours and not get smashed the way he was hoping to.

Oh well, another night wasted.

He would've pulled out his Icha Icha, but he didn't want to risk ruining its precious pages with precipitation. Instead he strolled down the dirt path, only weaving a little, and made his way to his sanctuary.

His true home, it seemed.

If he hadn't been there about a million times in the middle of the night before, he would've thought the stone memorial and its grounds were exceedingly creepy. But he'd seen every side of the rock's faces – sunshine, rain, cloudy, windy, and everything in between. He spent more time here, it felt like, than he did at home. Which made sense. Everyone he loved was here.

Well, all but one.

And that was a giant confusing mess.

As stood, the rain washing over his skin, the hairs on his neck started to prickle. He calmly looked up.

And a ghost stood before him.

Not but a few feet from him, in front of the memorial, stood the person that had died and vanished. Kakashi took a few moments to contemplate whether it was an alcohol induced mirage, he needed to finally get sleep, or if she was actually just standing right before him. She looked so casual.

And regal.

Something about her demeanor had changed.

His lips turned upward into a smile, "Aren't you dead?"

She seemed sad; grieving like someone had died.

Maybe she _was_ a ghost.

"Kakashi…" She whispered, "I didn't come here to apologize. I did what I had to do. I just couldn't leave knowing you were in the dark about everything,"

He was trying to figure out her motives and didn't say a word.

"Ask me anything and I'll tell you truthfully," She declared.

"You've changed," He muttered, "What happened? What was all of that fight bullshit then you up and run away?"

Hotaru dropped her head briefly, hiding her golden eyes from him for seconds. She sighed, "I figured you'd ask that right off," When she looked back to him, her gaze didn't falter, "I challenged Baal not just for revenge. I challenged him so I could take his place as the commander," His eyes grew wide, "As commander, I can release anyone I choose. So I _did_ fight for Ai's freedom like I told her, but I went about it in a very different way,"

"So you're… the leader of the fucking criminals now? Why? Why do something like that?"

"Someone has to be the bad guy, Kakashi. This way I can regulate the crimes. This way women and children won't be ripped from their families and raped. This way entire villages won't be piles of ash. Someone's got to do it. It's not going away because you believe in the good of the world. That's a myth and you know it,"

Then he did something that surprised the both of them.

In a flash, she was pinned against the hard rock. He was leaned in deathly close. It would've been kind of romantic if he was growling with anger and holding a freshly formed Chidori inches from her torso.

His exposed eye flashed with anger, "That makes you Konoha's enemy, then… _my_ enemy,"

It was all she could do to keep from crying where she stood. She fought desperately to maintain her composure, "That's how it has to be. It was destined from the time we were born. You can't fight things like this, Kakashi," She told him matter of factly.

He swallowed hard against his anger; his frustration. Why did everything turn to shit? Couldn't he have one god damn thing in this life?

"I should kill you now,"

"Go ahead," It wasn't a challenge or even spoken out of anger. She was truly devastated at the events of her life. But this was how it had to be.

She drew up her left hand, ungloved for him to see, "We both wear fabric to cover our insecurities, whether they can be seen on the skin or not," He looked at her palm. It had been disfigured by a blade and instead of a burned in marking, it was a jumble of knotted scar tissue, "This is the first time in my life that I've been able to take that glove off without hating myself," She smiled at him. He thought he caught a glimpse of a tear mixed with the rain smoothing across her face.

He lowered his head.

As if reading his thoughts, she spoke again, "If you want to see me again, then hunt me down. Follow me to the corners of the world,"

His eyes shot up to her's. It was like when they had first met again. He was entranced by her gaze. He could see the brightest sun in her eyes and feel the warmth that they gave off even in this cold, night rain.

"If you don't want to be labeled a traitor, then you need to kill me. I'd try to kiss you now, but I think that might spoil your reputation,"

Kakashi raised his eyebrows, but then he realized the situation. His nose, even in the soaking rain, caught the scent of a Leaf nin hiding in the foliage yards away. They were obviously watching to see the events would unfold. Kakashi could smell his rapidly beating heart and the sweat soaking through to their dampened clothes. They were nervous.

But he knew what he had to do.

"Chidori!" He shouted as he jammed the dense ball of lightening into her stomach. Her mouth fell open as she jerked in pain. Her eyes never left his, as they hadn't the first time she had gone down before him.

Hotaru disappeared into a puff of smoke.

The unknown ninja leapt from the bushes exclaiming, "Holy shit! A shadow clone! I can't believe it!" He stopped panting in front of his superior, "I thought for sure you had her,"

Kakashi was right. He was a nobody ninja who was scrawny enough to toss across the entire village, but his mind was stuck on something else.

'_If you want to see me again, then hunt me down. Follow me to the corners of the world.'_

Who in their right mind would risk their life, their reputation, and their class as a jounin of The Leaf to see her again? There was no question about it. She was an enemy now, as much as it pained him to admit.

Kakashi nodded his head in the direction of the Hokage mansion, "Come on. We have a report to file, I guess,"

He set off, the storm still beating down relentlessly, as the scrawny ninja followed at his heels.


	18. Bonus Chapter

**Note: I was going to end it at the last one, but I couldn't resist a bonus chapter. Beware, there is some graphic stuff here. Enjoy! ;)**

…

…

Two years had come and gone.

He never showed up.

Hotaru strolled through a deserted area. Rotting chunks of wood and piles of crumpled stone were scattered around her wherever she went. The ash was long gone by the time she could return to her broken homeland; washed away by countless summer storms and winter snows.

As she walked she remembered some of her fondest memories. She'd play with the siblings that lived in this house, or she used to get a drink of water from that old lady's well. It was a crumpled town full of nostalgia. She chose to remember all of the good times she had shared with the forgotten village.

She made her way further into the country, passing giant oak trees draped with ropy vines. The dirt road had been deserted for so long that it had devolved into nothing but a dirt pathway into the countryside. It was overflowing with grass and weeds that tickled her ankles as she walked.

When she reached a certain field, she paused and grinned. She could almost hear her father chuckling directions at her as she attempted a jutsu far beyond her grasp. He applauded her determination, but knew it was nearly impossible for her to succeed. He would never have told her that, though.

The house was virtually non existent. Even she, having lived there years ago, had a hard time finding it the first time she had returned. The grasses and flowers had taken over where the structure once stood proudly. Only the tiny, shattered remains of a chimney disrupted nature.

She smiled, content with the fact that, since she hadn't been able to give her parents a proper burial, nature had taken over and planted wild rows of brightly colored flowers in her stead.

Her mother would've loved the natural feel of her new home.

She continued her way up an impromptu pathway that had only recently been forged and made her way into the nearby forest. It was only a quick walk away, but it was, to her, the perfect spot.

Overlooking the river that wound its way through trees and rocks, was a freshly built cabin. It only had a few rooms, but it was her new home that held its roots in her old one.

She twisted the knob on her front door and strode in.

But she stopped. There was a different air about her place. She could feel it in her skin.

"You're hella late," She chuckled as she resumed her former motions and walked to the kitchen, "Even by your standards,"

A masculine laugh echoed from a darkly lit corner of the room, "I was held up,"

A man rose from the chair and stepped from the shadows. His silvery, white hair glistened when the sun's rays hit it.

Hotaru stopped where she stood. Her heart was beating so ferociously that she thought it was going to skip out of her chest. The soft padding sound of sandals on the wood floor crossed achingly slow until they stopped just behind her. She could feel his breath on her shoulder and on the back of her neck. Her whole being wanted her to turn around but something in her told her to stop. She couldn't bear it if she turned and it was someone else or, worse yet, no one at all.

A heavy hand rested itself upon her shoulder. He did the work for her and turned her.

She only caught the quickest glance of a barefaced Kakashi, Sharingan eye bared and all, just before he took her to his mouth. His musky scent overwhelmed her. Her knees grew weak and she started to wobble on her feet. Kakashi wrapped his muscular arms around her for support.

His lips were surprisingly soft, just as she remembered them. He had a five o' clock shadow dancing its way across his chin and jaw. It scratched at her face as she kissed him back.

He kissed her hungrily, as if he had craved her every second since they had parted. But it turned to soft, slow kisses, then to gentle pecks. She paused between these to look him over. He seemed unchanged; maybe a bit tired. Upon a closer look she spotted a couple of extra wrinkles that hadn't been there before – perks of the job. She was just thankful he was still alive and breathing.

"You're not wearing your Konoha gear…" She said as more of a statement than a question.

He put his palm to the side of her face and smoothed the pad of his thumb across her cheekbone, then down to stroke her plump bottom lip, "I'm not a Leaf Nin today. I'm just Kakashi," He smiled before kissing her again.

He backed her up until she was pinned between his waist and the edge of the kitchen counter. She ran her fingers up the muscles on his arms, across his broad shoulders and tangled them into his hair. The silver strands were soft, warm; just a little greasy from a long travel alone.

He found his way into her mouth; two velvet tongues dancing in the warmth. They weren't desperate for each other's bodies. They were more appreciating the fact that they had been brought together once again. They relished that they were so close after having been separated. They wanted to take their time; to cherish it. Instead of sex, they wanted love.

He slid his large hands down her waist and gripped her butt. He gave her a quick squeeze and lifted her to sit on the counter. She obeyed, too drunk on his kisses to care, and spread her legs for him to come closer.

Kakashi pressed in and she could feel his hot erection against her core. As they kissed and touched, she grew wetter. Her heart felt like it was expanding, pressing against her sternum, and it felt wonderful. He took the breath straight from her lungs.

A masculine hand teased at the bottom of her top, stroking along her stomach and obliques. He pulled the fabric above her head exposing a delicate, lacy pink bra. He smirked at her, giving his approval.

She smiled, but it was cut short into a gasp as he pushed a bra cup down and started to lick and suck at her pert pink nipple. He growled with desire, his cock pushing hard against his pants. As his mouth and tongue worked one breast, his other hand attended to the other.

The sound of their heavy breathing and the wetness soaking through her panties was driving her wild. Just knowing they were both aroused sent her to the edge. She tugged at his shirt clumsily, trying to get his shirt off of him. He pulled back just long enough to ditch the garment before diving to her breasts again. She whimpered and gasped when he would hit a soft spot. Before she knew it, she was grinding her core against him.

Kakashi rose to give her a fiercely hot kiss before grabbing her under the arms and standing her straight up on the floor. Her eyes grew wide in protest, but he was too damn fast for her brain to comprehend. He had slipped both her pants and panties from her where she stood. Confusion took hold. Her brain wasn't receiving the blood it needed to process this.

She was placed back on the counter in just a pink bra.

He pushed her thighs wide apart and, just before he could dive in, he swayed. His sensitive nose could pick up on every whiff of her arousal and he felt his cock throb against fabric. He dove into her core, lapping at the juices. His thick tongue stroked slowly across her opening up to her super sensitive clit.

She hadn't been with anyone in over twos years. She'd been holding out and having him sucking at her pussy was going to send her to the clouds.

She shuddered at the contact. He reached a hand up to continue to stroke and pinch her nipple as he slowly dipped his tongue into her. He tongued her with a gentle speed, but soon grew faster and faster until he was tongue fucking her like it was himself inside of her.

She moaned and cried as he built up speed. A soft ringing started in her ears and she felt like she would pass out. The room was spinning.

Suddenly the roof broke open and everything went black and bright at the same time. She was breathing rapidly and not breathing at all. Her body shook with pleasure. He gripped her outer thighs as she rode the wave of ecstasy.

When she came back down, he was still kneeling before her, his lips glistening and turned up into a pleased smile. Kakashi took no time and rose to his feet to embrace her mouth with his once more. He quickly unclasped her bra, exposing her breasts to the chilly air in the kitchen. She giggled like a little girl, unable to think straight.

Two huge arms wrapped gingerly around her and scooped her to his body. Hotaru wrapped her bare legs around his waist and kissed him. She could feel him moving beneath her body, but couldn't think. All she knew was that he was finally here, in her home, and that was all she needed from anything.

She was laid gently upon her bed and he stepped back to undo his pants, dropping them to his ankles. He stepped out, one leg at a time, and returned to the bed, covering Hotaru with himself.

His hard erection pushed against her. She could feel herself becoming hotter again, desperate to have him in her. She wanted to tell him, but could only fumble up a moan.

He chuckled, aware of her needs. He pressed against her body as he kissed her. Her nipples perked up and became hard as her rubbed his tight chest against them. Her hips ground at his erection, pleading him to move forward.

He took her cue. His hips drew back and pressed, slowly, into her. She cried at the invasion. Once he was completely in she could realize how empty she had felt the past year. He filled her to the brim and then some. He stretched her out.

Kakashi let out a cross of a moan and grunt. His cock twitched with anticipation inside her. He started to move at a steady pace.

She could feel the orgasm growing inside her again. She thought she would burst from the heat building up within. A sheen of sweat spread across their bodies as they moved in perfect rhythm of each other. Hotaru could feel Kakashi's erection start to tighten and she put up a hand to stop him from thrusting anymore.

When he pulled back he had the same wide eyed expression of defiance as she had when he had removed her from the counter. But she pushed him to lie on the bed and as soon as she straddled him, his gaze grew half-slit and sleepy as always.

She positioned him to her soaking wet opening and started to sink down on him. When he was fully in, he groaned and closed his eyes with pleasure. She started to grind on him, the soft sucking noise of the juices at her core echoing around the room. She leaned back and rubbed her hands across her breasts, teasing and pinching the nipples to please herself. Kakashi seemed to be enjoying the show. He watched her intently.

She kept up the steady grinding and stroking until he decided he wanted in on the action. Kakashi moved a hand to her pelvis and placed his large thumb to her clit. She ached at his touch and the grinding grew faster.

"That's it," He growled, "That's what I want,"

His expression was heady. The desire in his eyes made her even wetter until she was soaking his hips and thighs. He twirled his thumb in a circular motion and she bucked at the sensation. He urged her on as she went faster, her rhythm becoming more unstable.

She ground faster and faster. She couldn't take it anymore. She planted her palms against his rock hard chest for support as she dug her hips further and further. She could feel him hitting her sweet spot and she bit her lip so hard it drew blood.

Faster. Faster. Faster.

As he stroked her clit, she ground on him. She was losing sense of reality. The room was spinning once again. She felt like she was losing balance and would topple any second. But the sense of urgency kept her going at full strength.

It hit again and she wasn't sure if she fell over onto the bed or stayed where she was. She was floating high above the world in space and had no intentions of coming down.

…

…

The sun had gone down over the horizon hours before. A fire crackled in the fireplace. Kakashi and Hotaru lay intertwined on the sofa, a fluffy blanket draped across them. They'd lain there, just staying with each other, for a few hours. Catching up on the past year. They had vowed not to talk about work. It would just remind them of the giant red line that separated them.

As Kakashi lounged against the arm of the sofa, Hotaru nestled in his arms, he remembered something that he had wanted to ask her since he had seen her memories, "Did you love him, too?"

She had been softly stroking the hairs on his arm and paused. She didn't need to know the name. She already knew.

"I guess in a way… I did," She started, "But I think it was more about having someone there for me than wanting a lover,"

She pictured Asuma sitting at her beaten down table at one of her safe houses, a cloud of smoke swirling around his hair.

"Mm," Kakashi hummed.

She didn't feel any jealously radiating from him. Kakashi held a deep respect for the former Hokage's son. It was natural that anyone would gravitate towards him. It just cleared up a few moments of memories for him.

…

…

Later that night, long after the stars had come out to play in the sky, the pair laid in bed, nestled under the covers with the warmth of each other. It would be difficult, they knew, continuing down this path. Kakashi couldn't leave the village. It was his long time home and he'd more than once put up his life in exchange for the well being of its people. Likewise, Hotaru couldn't give up her life's work. On the outside, it seemed cruel and harsh. But she believed it was worth giving the rest of her life, and the easiness of 'good', to give a chance to unsuspecting victims.

She lay on her side, face nestled into the pillow and Kakashi tucked in behind her, as she started to drift into sleep. Her lover stroked the long brunette locks of hair that fell across her shoulders and down her back. With his sigh of contentment, she allowed herself to close her eyes and slip away.

In her dreams, she saw him once again. He sat, as always, at one of her tables, chain smoking a crumpled cigarette that hung loosely from his lips. It didn't take long for her to realize that this was an old memory of her's bringing itself back to light. She watched his mouth as he talked and licked her lips.

He sat toying with the pieces on the Shougi board, thinking an impossible move through.

"Asuma, why don't you give it a rest?"

He didn't look up, "I can't. I want to know how the hell that kid got out of this," He replied, speaking about his prodigy child Shikamaru.

She laughed off his comment and sat down at the table across from him. The pieces were in such a deadlock, she couldn't find the mysterious winning move either. A slender finger tapped her lip, "How about here?" She asked as she moved a gold general.

He shook his head negative, "No, that wouldn't work, see?"

She tilted her head and moved the piece to its previous position. They stayed like this, quiet, contemplating for awhile. Each trying to outwit a kid who wasn't even there.

Asuma broke the silence, "You know, you keep telling me to profess my love, right?"

She smirked, "Something like that,"

"I think you should find someone, too,"

Her only response was a faint laugh.

"No, I'm serious," He smiled at her. She couldn't help but notice how his nose crinkled just a little and his eyes sparkled, "I actually think I know a good match for you,"

She played intrigued, "Oh really? Well, do tell Mr. Matchmaker Man,"

"Hatake Kakashi,"

Her laugh faded into nothing, "The Copy Nin of the Leaf?" He nodded, "Jesus Christ, Asuma,"

"No I mean it," He grew serious, thinking of something she couldn't tell, "Just meet him, okay?"

Hotaru rolled her eyes playfully. The bond between them was something unexplainable. No one could define just what it was. But when she heard that Asuma had been murdered, it broke her down inside.

"Okay, okay. Now let's just figure this shit out. I feel like this thing with your kid is a personal battle now," They both laughed well into the night, attempting to outsmart Shikamaru. Of course, to no avail.


End file.
